


and if you call for me (you know i'll run)

by acumirklis



Series: Aisle of Poppies [3]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Complete, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Internal Conflict, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pining, Slow Burn, Unrequited Love, anyways buckle up and enjoy folks, dream and sapnap are the bestest of friends, friendship rocks, that sweet sweet yearning, they're oblivious sir
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:26:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 48,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27963005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acumirklis/pseuds/acumirklis
Summary: George loved Dream, and Dream loved George.So, why was it this fucking hard to admit to it?___George explores his newfound feelings, while Dream copes with his.(for more context, you can check out the first two oneshots of this series)
Relationships: Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: Aisle of Poppies [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1920604
Comments: 34
Kudos: 216





	1. Of Flustered Georges And Burnt Bread

**Author's Note:**

> I finally found some time to write :D  
> English isn't my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes, I don't have a beta haha
> 
> Anyways, enjoy!! As always, be respecful folks, and if any of the people say they're uncomfortable with these kinds of works, I'll take it down.
> 
> (title; old money by lana del rey)

_"There could have been no two hearts so open, no tastes so similar, no feelings so in unison." -Jane Austen_

___

Loving Dream knowingly was as easy as breathing.

What had he been so scared of, the first time he realized? Did he fear his feelings themselves, or the consequences they held?

It was pretty easy to figure out what the truth was. Of course, the love itself he felt for Dream was neither scary, nor bad. It was beautiful, so natural and oh, it felt so right. If there was one thing George was wholeheartedly sure of, it was that without all the messes and worries, he wouldn’t change a thing about what he felt. He’d embrace it, and bask in it, maybe even announce it to the whole world, yelling from the highest building mankind had ever built.

Truly, he loved Dream, and he loved the love he felt. But things weren’t that easy, were they? When had life ever been fair?

Because really, it was the implications and possibilities that scared George the most.

While most people’s biggest fear would have been rejection, George’s was change.

He was scared, regardless of the outcome of a potential confession; no matter if Dream reciprocated or not, something would change.

It was silly, but something about that made George feel uneasy. It wasn’t even that he felt like their friendship was fragile and easily shaken, quite the opposite. No, he wasn’t worried about that in the slightest. But there needn’t be an enormous change for things to start feeling…off.

To George, nothing felt quite worse than imagining small changes in their relationship due to these newfound feelings. If Dream didn’t love him back, he’d still be his friend, George knew. He’d be there for him, joke with him, and make him feel so comfortable he could forget his worries for a while. But what if, suddenly, he’d be more cautious about saying the words “I love you” to George? What if all of a sudden, he’d stop jokingly using ridiculous pet names for each other? What if, when they joked around and someone made a joke about them being flirty, he’d immediately go to George’s defence, allowing for the carefree mood to cease? George hated those scenarios the most, because seemingly nothing would change, they’d carry on, but the small things they’d refrain from doing, tiptoe around, would slowly kill him overtime.

He worried that he’d make Dream feel uncomfortable with certain things he did, naturally, and allow for an ever-present tension of slight discomfort to loom over their friendship.

And yet, he also feared the opposite; an absence of change. What if Dream carried on, as if nothing ever happened, and would remain the same? Wouldn’t that hurt just as much, this obvious feeling of Dream not caring? Would it even be genuine, or forcefully faked?

George was so, so confused. For weeks he’d tried to come up with answers, take pros and cons into account. He’d always been someone to overthink and over plan, but that usually never happened with people he was romantically interested in, not that he’d had very many in the past.

Truthfully, George was the kind of person to jump in head first when it came to love; he saw no reason to hesitate. Because why, really? Hesitation was a waste of time, and overthinking everything would only result in more complications, could result in the person you desired leaving because your silence lasted too long. With his ex-girlfriend, he’d confessed a week after he’d realized he was in love with her. Of course, he’d had worries, but he knew that he had to tell her, he needed to get it off his chest, so they could figure out what to do from there. When they’d talked, she’d confessed that her feelings had been known for quite a while, she had just been too shy to say anything. George knew then that he was glad to have made the first step, because truly, would their spark have been burning for much longer if none of them had fed the fire?

With everyone he’d found interest in, George had let them know very early on. He wanted them to be on the same level, talk things through, and grow together from then. So why was the thought of confessing to Dream alone enough to trigger fear in his heart?

The answer was simple; Dream was different. From the moment they’d started their friendship, George had always had a special place for Dream in his heart. Their bond had been unique from the beginning, and George found that he never quite got the same feeling of familiarity and safety around others as he did with Dream. The latter had been with him through it all, always by his side, never once leaving. He’d been there for the biggest events of George’s life, and all of the smallest. Dream’s presence was as natural as the changing seasons, the bustle of cities. There was a blanket of trust and comfort over George’s shoulders whenever Dream was present, and he was so very grateful for that. As someone who’d been a loner for most of his life, always wanting to handle things on his own, the day he realized that he wanted Dream to be there with him was one of the most game changing ones. After he knew, he’d no longer cry alone, he’d cry with Dream on the other end of the phone line, providing comfort, reassurance and safety. He no longer went without telling Dream right away when the smallest of victories happened. All of the things he’d previously suffered through or enjoyed alone, he now shared with Dream. He was no longer alone, and he no longer wanted to be.

Dream had been the only constant in his life for so long, George worried with confessing, he’d step into a new territory unknown to them, and their future together.

And even if Dream felt the same, George feared the change. Would they work as lovers, would there always be a distance between them, some sort of tension? Would it be awkward, weird, would it make them uncomfortable? Would they struggle with intimacy, trust, and finding a new balance after living a different one for years? Would they maybe realize that this was not something they wanted after all, end it and have their friendship be forever marked with a weird event in-between? Would that affect their happiness for the other, would there always be awkwardness whenever they introduced their new lovers to each other?

George was so unsure; his head was starting to hurt. Overthinking was as natural as his heart beating to him, but for once in his life, he wanted nothing more than for it to stop. He wanted to be just as straight forward, just as confident in telling Dream about his feelings, wanted to be the one to show some reassurance and stability. If Dream had any worries, he wanted to be the one to tell him that there was no reason to, they’d get through whatever this was, because their bond was so much stronger than anything else. For once, George wanted to be sure of himself, but he wasn’t, he couldn’t.

Loving Dream knowingly was as easy as breathing, but so was the dread.

Maybe he’d felt too surely about their friendship, what if it wasn’t as solid as George believed it to be? That thought alone made him wince, because these thoughts were venturing into a territory he hadn’t been to in so long, and never wanted to return to. He was confident in what they had, but not in what this would do. He knew their friendship, their dynamic, their history, but this was completely new, and he worried that it would be the one thing to throw off their balance, stir things up ever so slightly and have it all be threatened to fall.

What was at stake here, what could he potentially lose? His love for Dream was like waves of the sea; sometimes soft and even, other times big and wild. More often than not, it was unpredictable; he’d be feeling just fine, and then, suddenly, Dream would do something that tipped him over, and he felt the love for his best friend crush his whole chest, washing it all ashore. The beauty, and the agony. He would feel his breath hitch, and for the smallest amount of time, he’d have to still his movements, afraid that a single motion would shatter something and he’d drown in it. Those moments weren’t as frequent, thankfully, but when they did occur, George wouldn’t stop thinking about it for the whole day. Sometimes, people picked up on it, he knew, but no one ever said anything, aside from maybe a small comment on his sudden mood change.

It was unpredictable, but whenever it didn’t happen, all George would feel was a sense of calm. It was a feeling he liked to compare to the safety of a home; cosy and warm, ever-present. Dream was the only one who could make George feel so at ease, allow him to fully come out of his shell, just be himself, because that was the George Dream loved the most.

Truly, Dream loved George, the older knew that. It wasn’t even because of the countless of times the younger had told him just that, it was rather the fact that George could see Dream care for him. Those small little gestures he did, those comforting words, the way he was always there for George no matter what, how he excitedly listened to his stories and interests. How he worried for him, and was ready to stand up for him whenever needed. Dream was a great friend, as good as they came, and George was so grateful for him. Out of all the people he’d met in his life, Dream was the one who’d made the most impact without leaving after. Someone who was by George’s side, asking for nothing but his friendship in return. George often wondered how he’d gotten this lucky.

All of his friends were amazing, he wouldn’t have traded them for anything in this world. Yet Dream had always stood out, had always been different in the most special of ways, wasn’t that the truest and most natural thing there was?

So really, George’s newfound feelings put him in a spot he didn’t want to be in. He loved loving Dream, as reluctant as he was to say it, he made up for it by showing him instead. He really hoped Dream saw it, paid attention to it.

Somehow, saying the words aloud had always bothered George. No matter how much he loved a person, he struggled with expressing it. With his family, it simply wasn’t a thing they did, they’d always shown it with gestures. And his ex-girlfriend? That had been much easier, but the words still tasted foreign on his tongue, so he wouldn’t go out of his way to say it as often as maybe other people did. But with Dream? Of course, it was slightly different again. With Dream, it felt like he wanted to say it to him, wanted to learn all about what the appeal was. He wanted Dream to know of his love, and he wanted to show him in every way he could. It was cheesy, and his thoughts alone were enough for George to quietly blush, but he found that he didn’t care all that much. Dream had always sparked the most unusual of ideas in his heart, this one was no different.

George wanted to hold him; show him how gentle he could be. He wanted Dream to see all of his love, and of course, he wanted Dream to show him all of his. Those small daydreams he had, imagining them taking little walks hand-in-hand, driving at night, singing until their throats were sore, their voices gone. Wanting to cuddle on the couch while a movie was playing in the background, long forgotten because each other’s eyes were so much more interesting. Bickering like they always did, and have their friends fondly roll their eyes at them, as all of them spent the days together. Watching the sunset at a beach, his head on Dream’s shoulder as there was no need for words. George felt a little ridiculous for thinking of all these, and more, but he knew that there was nothing he could have changed, this was simply something he had to deal with.

But reality wasn’t like his little daydreams, unfortunately. So much would have to happen, so much would have to change for them to get to that point, and George was afraid.

One of the things he tried not to think about too much, even when it naturally seeped into his dreamt-up scenarios, was rejection.

It was the most plausible scenario, though, wasn’t it? All things considered, all of his scenarios and daydreams aside, Dream was straight. There was no denying it.

His friend had told him, so why would he doubt him? It wasn’t like George had any reason to question Dream’s word, it wasn’t even his place to. Generally, the younger didn’t talk much about this topic, George only remembered that one time a few years ago when Dream had told him. And not to mention, the other had only ever dated girls, so to George, the reality of things was pretty clear.

It didn’t hurt as much as he thought it would, really. Sexuality was not something anyone was able to control or change, no one should be blamed for that. The possibility of Dream loving George back was out of his hands, and in this reality, not something that could happen. George found slight comfort in that thought; Dream didn’t love him, not because he didn’t want to, but because he was naturally wired not to. Sometimes, George would imagine a world where Dream wasn’t straight, and he thought that the chances of him being able to make his best friend fall for him were pretty good. He didn’t want to sound too cocky, he had his own insecurities anyways, but Dream and love were two things that went hand-in-hand, and he knew that the same thing applied to him for Dream. They’d be able to figure it out, in that little fantasy world of his, and that was good enough for him.

George thought that maybe it was a good idea to talk to somebody about it. It felt weird not being able to share this with Dream, he’d been sharing all of his thoughts with the latter for so long, it felt wrong knowing that this wasn’t as easy anymore, at least not right now. But over the years, he’d realized that he did seek the comfort of others, and being able to confide in them. So really, he should make a call, vent a little, get things off his chest. Maybe that would put some things into perspective, allow him to have a more clear and rational view of the situation.

In reality, George knew nothing. Even in a scenario where Dream reciprocated, he didn’t know if he’d even want a relationship, what he’d be ready to engage with. It was all too confusing, and no matter what he did, clarity seemed to be a thing of impossibility at the moment.

So, he decided that he’d call the one person he trusted with things like these most after Dream, and he hoped dearly that it would help.

But for now, he lied down in his bed after a long day of streaming, and closed his eyes, trying to fall asleep to the soft sounds of the classical music he’d put on.

George knew this was confusing and scary, but oh, above all, it was beautiful. He’d see what talking about this openly would change for him, and he hoped that whatever that was, he’d be able to tell Dream all about it.

The last thing he saw before falling asleep was his hand reaching out to someone standing in the shadow of a tall tree.

­­__­_

“George, what the hell?!”, Dream wheezed as he fell to his death.

George was giggling, feeling proud of himself. Finally, he’d managed to catch Dream off guard, he’d managed to push him down a ravine.

_Dream fell from a high place_

“GEEEEEEEEEEEEORGE!”, the younger yelled, amusement evident in his voice, and all George could reply with was more laughter.

It was one of those calm days, when none of them had any particular plans. On those days, they liked to simply play some games with each other, without the pressure of thousands of people watching. It was just them, and George loved those days the most.

Well, it was them and Sapnap.

“George?! How could you kill my buddy, my best pal?!”, Sapnap’s exaggerated voice tuned in.

George rolled his eyes, smiling to himself. “He deserved it; he’s pushed me off enough times.”

Sapnap snorted. “And? That’s not a reason to seek vengeance, George! You’re the oldest, you should know violence is not the answer!”

George hummed. “Yes, because it’s the solution. Now shut up and come here, where even are you?”

“I’m doing all the work, while you two lovebirds were busy killing each other, I actually gathered enough resources for our empire!”, he stated proudly, and George’s cheeks started to heat up.

“We’re not-“, but before he could finish, Dream let out the biggest war cry as he jumped and pushed George down the same ravine, the older had forgotten to step away from the edge.

“DREAM!”, George screamed as he fell, Dream’s manic laughter filling his ears.

Luckily, he had a water bucket, though.

He managed to MLG water, and he could practically hear Dream’s pout.

“Geooorge, you’re no fun!”, he said as he sneaked over the edge.

George chuckled as he picked up the stuff Dream had lost. “I am plenty fun! You should thank me, really, I went out of my way to bring you your stuff back!”

“Absolutely not, you’re literally the reason my stuff’s down there in the first place! Take accountability, idiot!”

“Whatever.”, George muttered, smile still ever-present.

By the time he’d come back up, Sapnap had joined them, enthusiastically explaining that he’d found the perfect place to build their house.

“What are we, 12? Why are you so keen on building a house?”, George teased, watching in amusement as Sapnap’s character turned around slowly and his pixel eyes stared deeply into his soul.

“You…you traitor! How dare you! You’re never too old to build a pretty cottage core house in Minecraft! With flowers and sheep! All cute and cosy and live there with your homies, platonically cohabiting!”, Sapnap said, voice monotone.

Dream wheezed, and George acted as if he was offended.

“I agree with him, George. There ain’t nothing wrong with being cottage core lesbians with the homies!”

And George sighed, because what was there to counter? He knew it was true.

“Whatever, you guys are stupid. Anyways, show us the place, it better be in a flower field.”

Sapnap gasped. “How did you know?! You hit the head on the nail, buddy!”

Dream wheezed. “That’s not how the saying goes, oh my God-”

George shook his head. “Drop it, Dream. He might throw his piece of iron chest plate your way if you don’t stop.”

Sapnap clicked his tongue. “Why am I friends with you guys? I’m clearly much cooler than you.”

George snorted. “No, I’m the cool friend out of us three, denial is a river in Egypt, Snapmap.”

And the next thing he knew was that he was being chased down by an angry Sapnap as Dream just watched, trying not to suffocate from laughter.

___

“Now that’s what I call a HOUSE!”, Sapnap stated proudly, looking over their small wooden cabin they’d spent way too much time on.

“Duh, what else would it be?”

“Shut up, George”

“It’s perfect, the villagers ain’t got nothing on us!”, Dream said.

George nodded. “Sure, it’s not too bad. If you would have let me build all of it though it would have looked so much better.”

“Narcissist much?”, Sapnap retorted, hitting him with his sword once.

“Stop it, Sapnap! You’re killing me!”, George whined while still on more than half of his hearts.

“sToP iT sApNap, YoU’Re kiLLinG mE!”, the youngest mocked, hitting George once more.

The latter let out a shocked gasp. “You’re killing me, Dream do something!”

Dream chuckled. “What am I supposed to do? Figure it out yourselves, idiots.”

“Yehees!”, Sapnap giggled as he started to chase a screaming George down.

Dream just watched them, soft smile on his lips.

_Idiots._

­___

“Sapnap, what the hell is this?”, Dream asked, as he looked at a hideous statue Sapnap had built…of him?

“It’s you, Dweamie! Do you like it?”, the youngest asked, George would bet ten pounds that he was batting his eyelashes at his monitor.

“It’s so…ugly.”, Dream answered.

Sapnap gasped audibly. “Dream, what the hell?! Here I am, being the best friend anyone could ever ask for, building you a STATUE of you in Minecraft, IMMORTALIZING you in this world, and what do I get in return? Nothing but DISRESPECT!”

“Sapnap, it’s the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen, and I see George’s face whenever he streams!”

“Why are you bringing me into this? What’s wrong with you?”, George chimed in, feigning offence.

He knew Dream didn’t mean it, he had plenty of proof that the other actually thought him to be quite handsome.

“George, shut up, this is between me and Dream. So, Dream, how does this feel, then?”, Sapnap replied, whipping out a flint and steel.

He sprinted toward the statue made out of lime green, black and white wool, and started setting it on fire. After he was satisfied with the destruction he’d caused, he fled back to Dream and George, joining them in watching the eyesore burn.

“How do you feel now, Dream?”, he said after a while, sounding proud.

“Quite relieved, actually.”, Dream answered, voice comically void of any emotion.

George snickered as he heard Sapnap gasp and try to chase Dream down, who calmly killed Sapnap after only a few hits.

“DREAM WHAT THE HELL?! DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT WILL TAKE ME TO RUN BACK?!”, their friend yelled, but it was mainly drowned out by Dream’s delightful laughter.

George smiled at his screen. No matter how idiotic, he loved his friends, so dearly. Sapnap may have been annoying at times, but he wouldn’t have traded him for anything in this world.

The more stupid things Sapnap kept saying, the more Dream kept laughing.

George loved the younger’s laugh; it was incredibly infectious. Dream could have been laughing about something he read on the back of a shampoo bottle, and George would have laughed with him as if it was the funniest thing he’d ever heard. Dream’s laugh was incredibly beautiful, and more often than not, George wished he’d be able to see Dream’s face as he laughed. He wanted to see that unfiltered happiness, that joy in his eyes. He wanted to see how Dream doubled over, holding his stomach, wheezes forcing their way out. George wanted to be the one Dream would lean against as he tried to calm down, he wanted to be the one to make Dream laugh even harder.

That one time they’d met in Brighton, George had been able to see Dream’s face as he’d laughed. It was a sight he wouldn’t be able to forget, ever, it had burned itself into his memory.

Dream was beautiful, in so many ways. When he was just relaxed, face calm and a slight smile always on his lips. Whenever he thought too hard, he’d scrunch up his nose a little, and to George that was the most endearing thing this world had to offer.

But most of all, Dream’s face as he laughed was George’s favourite, in the end. The pure happiness he’d seen the younger radiate still made his heart beat just a tad bit faster.

It was addicting; he wanted to see it every day. That one time had not been enough. And George hated how he only had a small variety of emotions Dream had displayed on his face in his memory. He wanted to know them all, wanted to see everything Dream would let him. George longed to see his best friend’s face in the morning, sleepy and cute. He longed to see his face as he was getting competitive, mind set on winning. He wanted to see his face as he was surprised, worried, confused, all of it. It was a little ridiculous, but George didn’t care. He wanted to see all there was to Dream, he longed to be by his side to witness it all.

He knew he could have that, at least part of it. Of course, they’d meet up again, eventually. And Dream would allow him to see, as always, because he trusted George.

George missed him every day, even when they were on a call for hours. There was always a distance they could not close, an entire ocean between their hearts. No matter how much George loved their calls, their little Minecraft dates, their streams and YouTube videos, their good night and wake up calls, Dream was not by his side. He couldn’t reach out and hug him, he couldn’t gently pet his hair. He was not able to playfully hit his shoulder when Dream teased him, or lean his head against the younger as they were done talking for the day. It hurt to know that there was no such possibility, and sometimes George wished he had the balls to just fly over to Florida, knock on Dream’s door and hug him, not caring about what the other would think of him.

Would Dream be weirded out? Would he stiffen as George hugged him; would he frown as his eyes would fall on George’s frame?

George knew, deep down, that Dream would be happy to see him. He’d immediately invite him in, pour him a glass of apple juice and they’d talk for hours on end. Dream wouldn’t even ask why George had flown all the way over there all of a sudden, he’d just be grateful for George’s company.

So truly, George thought a lot about that. He wanted to visit Dream, but something held him back. Was it the fear of being found out? Maybe. George knew that if he did end up flying over to Florida, he’d have to tell Dream. He wanted the younger to know, and he wanted to tell him in person. But would George ever be ready to take that step? Would he be ready to deal with Dream’s rejection?

Oh, how he loved his best friend. Even now, imagining the pain he’d be feeling at the rejection, he also felt so warm. George knew Dream would make him feel great, even after that, he’d reassure him and he’d hold him, telling George that it wasn’t his fault and everything would be okay. This alone gave George so much comfort, and so much courage.

There was no doubt in his mind; he’d have to confess, and he’d have to confess to him in person. How else would Dream be able to see the sincerity in his eyes?

But it wasn’t time yet, George still had to think everything through. He wanted to confide in someone, and plan how he’d even get to Florida.

One thing was for sure; Dream had to know. There was no way around it.

No matter how much he loved loving Dream, he hated the guilt that came with it. Because really, he felt so guilty at times. The things he imagined, the scenarios he desperately wanted to become reality. He felt guilt for seeing his friend in such a way, when the other was so sweet and saw him as a friend. Sometimes, George felt dirty. It almost felt forbidden; this love and this want he had for his best friend. Why was he feeling all this, wasn’t love supposed to be pure and weightless?

Before George could think about it any further, he shook his head. This was not the right moment to think about all that, he was spending time with his two best friends, and he didn’t want to ruin their little date with his ridiculous infatuation.

“George? Are you okay?”, Dream’s soft voice brought him back to reality.

“I-, yeah I’m good, thanks Dream”, George replied, tone ever so gentle.

There was a comfortable silence for a little while, even Sapnap stayed silent.

“You can talk to me, you know? If anything’s up?”, Dream started, his character’s head turning to face George.

The latter smiled. “I know.”

And that was the truth; Dream would always be by his side, no matter what.

All of those worries he had, in the end, they didn’t necessarily matter. Dream was his best friend above anything else, that that wouldn’t change.

They resumed playing as if nothing had happened, Sapnap came back and immediately tried to kill Dream again.

Laughter filled the silence again, and George’s chest felt light.

The atmosphere was calmer than before, and George watched his two best friends in amusement.

He was so happy to have them.

___

Well, this was awkward.

George scratched the back of his neck as he nervously looked away from his computer screen.

This had been his idea, of course, but somehow, he suddenly felt so unsure of himself, he got shy.

“George? You good?”, Minx asked, something akin to worry in her voice.

George’s head shot right back up, and he stared into her questioning blue eyes.

“Yeah, sorry, I just…I don’t know, this is weird.”, he managed.

Minx stayed silent for a second, before starting calmly. “George, you do know that you don’t have to do this, right? Just because I won your Love or Host doesn’t mean you have to actually talk to me or whatever.”

“Oh, no no! That’s not why- Okay, wait, give me a minute.”, George quickly answered, biting his lip.

Why was he sweating so much?

“Sure, take your time.”, Minx let out slowly, before looking back at her phone.

George took a deep breath; this had to be done. Even if they never really had any romantic tension, he felt like he at least owed her an explanation. George had kind of been avoiding this for a while; it felt weird. Maybe even out of place. Yet, against all odds, George actually really liked Minx, she obviously played up her character during streams a bit, she was much calmer privately. And probably one of the nicest people George had ever met, even with the constant excessive cursing. She was great, and George felt like she deserved to know his side of the story.

“So, um-“, he started again, coughing a little.

Minx smiled, not teasingly, but quite softly. “What, cat got your tongue, lover boy?”

George blushed. “No, no! I mean-, fuck this.”

Minx’s eyebrow shot up. “Didn’t take you for someone who curses, Georgie.”

George looked to his side, before turning to face her, expression serious.

“Okay, so; I know we don’t really, have any tension, if that makes sense? Wait, that sounds so weird-“, why was he messing up so bad?

Minx stayed silent, patiently waiting.

“Basically, I don’t think either of us want to, you know, date?”, George let out.

Minx barked out a laugh. “Oh George, this got you all nervous and cute? THIS?”

As she was laughing, George blushed a deeper crimson red. Sure, she was nice, but she loved to tease just as much.

“That’s adorable. But yes, George. At least from my side, there is nothing I want from you. Or, well, maybe I’d be able to see you as my clout boyfriend-”

“No, absolutely not.”

“-Never mind, then.”, Minx chuckled, before leaning a little forward, closer to the camera, face reassuring. “Don’t worry, George, I don’t have any feelings for you, and I know you have none for me. I don’t even think we’d work out, to be honest.”, she said, words gentle.

George smiled. “Yeah, thank you for understanding. You’re an amazing person, it’s just that-“

“I’m gonna have to cut you off right there, dude, don’t give me that cheesy shit.”, she said, tone teasing again.

George pouted. “I wasn’t trying to be cheesy, just honest. I think you’re great, I just don’t think I can afford a relationship with anyone right now, it’s kind of complicated.”

Minx hummed. “I understand. The Love or Host thing was just for shits and giggles, anyways, don’t worry about it. I enjoyed talking to you, but I probably liked our little Minecraft date after the most.”

George snorted. “Yeah, the one where you spat on me?”

Minx narrowed her eyes. “Yeah, the one where you took my bed!”

“Point taken.”

Minx smiled. “Really, George, on a more serious note; I appreciate this, you’re a really sweet dude. I like you a lot. Even if we won’t be grossly smooching behind a shed somewhere, care to be friends instead?”

George blinked. “I-, yeah sure, of course. Let’s be friends, Minx.”

“Perfect!”, she said, smile wide.

“Again, sorry about me being weird. This situation is just…odd.”

Minx shook her head. “No, I totally get it, dude, it’s fine. I’m just glad we can talk casually like this. To be honest, I never go on that show to really find anyone, don’t think it works, at least not for me.”

George hummed. “Yeah, it’s just awkward, I feel like it would work better in person.”

“True that. Anyways, I have a stream coming up in a few minutes, is it okay if I end the call?”

“Of course, sure. Talk to you later, I guess?”, George answered, cursor hovering over the ‘end call’ button.

“Of course, baby!”, and with that, her face disappeared from the screen.

Well, that went better than expected.

George really liked Minx; she was a fun person to be around. He was glad they’d cleared the air, now he didn’t have to worry about that anymore.

And hey, if anything, he’d gained a new friend.

And that alone was great in George’s book.

___

George was making himself something for dinner when his phone rang.

“Hello?”, he answered, not bothering to check who had called.

“George!”, Dream’s excited voice yelled into his ear and he flinched away, holding his phone away from his ear, nose scrunched up.

“Why are you screaming, Dream? You can talk to me normally.”

Dream ignored him. “Geeeeorge, guess what!”

“What?” Shit, was his bread about to burn?

“I taught Patches how to sit!”, Dream said, nothing but pure joy dripping from his tone.

“You, you what?”, George asked in disbelief.

“I taught my girl how to sit! Like a dog! I stand there, she’s in front of me, I’m holding a treat and I say ‘sit!’ and BOOM; she sits, just like that! Isn’t that amazing, George?! She’s such a good girl, I swear she’s the smartest cat there is!”

“I-, yes, of course, whatever you say, Dream”, George answered, grin making its way onto his lips.

“Hm, I didn’t hear immense pride and excitement radiate from your statement, I’m giving you another chance. Don’t blow this, George.”, Dream said, voice calm.

George really had to try his hardest not to laugh. “Dream, this is ridiculous. You do know that it’s not that great of an accomplishment, right?”

Oop, there it was. Pout™.

“George, you’re such a party pooper. Here I am, calling you right after I achieve my greatest accomplishment in life, and all I get in return is your snarky remarks! Even Sapnap would have had a better reaction than you!”

Now George couldn’t help but laugh.

“What are you laughing at, idiot? My misery? The pain I feel at your blatant betrayal?”

Maybe he was laughing a little too hard now, bread long forgotten.

“Dream, oh my God. You’re so stupid.”

“I’m no such thing! I’ll have you know I am a man of 900IQ, how dare you insult me?”, the younger retorted, not able to hide the smile in his voice.

“You’re ridiculous, wow. But yes, Dream, I am very proud of you, very happy for you! Patches is the greatest girl there is, and the smartest, juuust like her owner! A dream team, a sight for sore eyes!”, he finally managed to say between laughs.

Dream clicked his tongue. “Well, that’s got to be the fakest thing you’ve ever said.”

George giggled. “So what? Isn’t it what you wanted to hear?”

“I, yes! Of course! But I wanted you to mean it!”, Dream answered, clearly still pouting.

George smiled softly. “For real though, I’m happy Patches learned a new trick. I’m sure she appreciated the extra treats a lot.”

“Yes, she did! She’s running around happily, she’s in a great mood! Wait, I’ll send you a video, hold on-“, Dream said as he abruptly ended the call.

George stared at his phone for a second too long, with a smile a tad bit too fond, before he put in on the counter, quickly taking the bread out the oven. It was slightly burned; but nothing that would kill him. Hopefully.

He put it on the plate with his other food items, before heading to his bedroom, sitting down in front of the computer.

As he swayed side to side in his chair, he quietly chuckled as he received a new message from Dream.

Wow, Patches really did look happy.

George watched the video, and he heard Dream’s voice in the background, a couple of octaves higher than usual, and something in his heart clicked.

These, George thought, were the moments he loved the most with Dream. Calling each other excitedly because of the most ridiculous of things, it never failed to make George’s cheeks hurt from smiling so much. They were so small and seemingly insignificant, but they meant the world to George. He loved the thought of being the first person to come to Dream’s mind when something great happened to him, no matter how big or small. It made feel George feel incredibly special, and it made him feel glad, because Dream was also the first person he thought to call whenever something happened.

Dream called him again, and George picked up right away.

“Did you see it, George? Did you? She was so happy, wasn’t she, oh my God why is she so cute, did you see how-“, and he kept rambling, and George? George listened, smile never leaving his face.

They talked for hours; topics changing every minute. They never grew bored of each other.

As George listened to Dream talk about what he’d love to teach Patches next, he closed his eyes, allowing himself to fully appreciate the way his heart was beating in sync with Dream’s laughs.

Yes, he loved this, he loved them.

Nothing could ever change that.

___

George nervously turned his phone around in his hand.

It was pretty late, but it shouldn’t have been that late for him, he thought.

Biting his lip, George just decided to fuck it and clicked the call button.

“Hello?”, a soft voice answered.

“Hey, Bad.”, George said, looking out of his window thoughtfully.

“Oh, hi George! What brings you to me this late at night?”, Bad’s cheerful tone sounded from the other end of the line.

“Hi, um, do you have time to talk right now?”, George forced out, feeling his heart beat against his chest.

“Of course, George, I’ve always got time for you.”, the older confirmed gently.

Oh, how much George loved Bad.

“Thank you. So, ehh, this is, um, a little weird.”, he started, voice a little shaky.

“George, not matter what it is, you don’t have to be nervous, it’s just me. I’ll listen, yeah? Take your time.”, Bad’s reassuring tone calmed some of George’s worries right away.

“Yes, it’s just…I’ve never really talked about this to anyone before, and it’s kind of, I don’t know…it’s kind of scary, I know it shouldn’t be, but here I am, well, scared.”, George started, clearly stalling still.

Bad stayed silent. George appreciated it.

“Okay, I’ll just go ahead and say it; I like Dream”, George forced out, and there was an immediate weight lifted off his chest.

Bad kept quiet for a second. “I assume you mean this romantically?”

George swallowed. “I, yes. Yes, I do. I like Dream, no wait, I love Dream. That’s more accurate. I’m in love with him.”

Bad hummed. “Okay. How long have you known?”

George didn’t have to think. “A few weeks, I guess.”

“And do you think you have felt this way for just as long?”

George shook his head, even when Bad couldn’t see it. “No, it’s been longer than that. A lot, actually, I think. I don’t know, to be honest. I don’t remember when it started, so it must have been quite a while.”

He heard Bad breathe out softly. “George, are you okay with me asking a few questions? I don’t think I can help you, if, you know, I have no idea what’s going on.”

“Yes, of course, I trust you.”

There was definitely a smile when Bad spoke next. “Good, thank you for trusting me. So, you’ve known about this for a while, and have felt like this for even longer. But, how do you actually feel about this? Are you handling it well, or are these feelings an issue?”

George sighed. “It’s not that. I am fine with the way I feel, I understand why I do. And the whole ‘Dream’s a dude’ thing is also not an issue for me, not really. I guess I’m just, worried? I’m not sure how I should tell him.”

“So, you want to tell him?”

“Yeah, definitely. He deserves to know.”, George said.

“Alright, so; You’re in love with Dream and you are fine with it, correct?”

“Yep.”

“Got it. And you want to tell him, but you don’t know how to?”

“Exactly.”

“Okay, I think I understand it a little better.”, Bad said after a little while, something shuffling in the background.

“Is Rat with you?”, George chuckled.

“Of course! She also wants to help you, Rat say hi!”

A high-pitched bark was heard, and George rolled his eyes, smiling.

“Hi Rat, I appreciate it.”

Bad let out a breath. “To be honest, I feel like there’s not much more you can do, George. I’m sure you know that Dream wouldn’t judge you for this, so all there really is to do is, well, confess.”

George sighed. “I know. I guess I don’t know when to tell him? Or what to tell him in the first place? You know he’s straight, it’s not like this is about me trying to court him or something.”

Bad chuckled. “Wow, fancy words, George. I won’t say anything about Dream, I don’t know enough about that. But I’m sure you’ll find the right moment eventually.”

“I hope so, too.”, George replied, running his hand over his face.

“What if you try and think of everything you’d want him to know, and say it to me, first?”, Bad suggested carefully.

George thought about it for a while; did he want to expose himself like that, be this vulnerable for once?

The answer was easier than he thought it would be.

“Yes.”

“The stage is yours, George. Feel free to stop whenever you want.”

“Thank you, Bad, this means so much to me.”

“Of course, you muffin, now tell me. Tell me about Dream.”

George took a deep breath.

“He’s…he’s so stupid.”, George started, and why were there already tears trying to press against his closed eyelids? And yet, he was smiling.

“He’s literally the most ridiculous person this world has ever seen. He’s loud, he’s annoying, fuck, he’s such a pissbaby!”

Bad let the curse word slip, he knew better than to interrupt George right now.

“Sometimes he’s gross, and weird, and he sends me the shittiest memes! His jokes are so unfunny, he is so dumb! And his stupid hair is too fluffy, and I hate how bright his eyes are, even with the damn piss colour!”, George felt his mouth go dry.

“Fuck, he’s an idiot. But he’s my idiot. Well, not mine, not like that, but like…he is the most endearing person there is, you know? He always makes me feel like everything’s okay, there is so much comfort permanently attached to the sound of his voice. I love his laugh, I love it so fucking much, you understand, Bad? It makes me want to laugh with him, and that’s stupid. He’s stupid!”, a single tear ran down George’s reddened cheek.

“He’s always there for me, for everything, the good and the bad. He’s the best friend I could have ever asked for; he just knows me perfectly; he knows all there is to me. No matter what, he knows what to say, because he’s just great like that!”

“And sometimes I think; What would I have done without him? What would I be without him? He helped me with so much, he’s literally the reason why I am working the job I love the most right now, he’s the reason why I am so much better at talking to people.”

“He literally has been by my side, for so long, I don’t know what I’d do with myself it all this suddenly stopped! I know it’s irrational, I know he wouldn’t just leave like that…but what if? My brain keeps fucking me over, on one hand, there’s the truth, and on the other, there’s my greatest irrational fears!”

“I had a nightmare, a few days ago. Everything was the same, but he was so distant, you know? Dream was so cold to me, and I knew it was my fault. I could feel him slip through my fingers, and I was helpless, there was nothing I could have done to keep him in my life! It felt so horrible, it hurt so much, I swear I can sometimes feel the phantom of the pain still.”

“I know how he feels, Bad, I know. He is the best person, he’s my person, he loves me, I know. But not like that, not in the way I love him. I don’t want him to feel guilty about that, I’m so scared he might feel the same amount of guilt about not being able to love me as me not being able to stop loving him.”

“And the worst part is; I can’t blame him, and I can’t blame myself. This was bound to happen, sooner or later. I’m surprised how I didn’t figure shit out earlier. It’s been there, right in front of my face! I feel like everyone’s picked up on it before me, what if he already knows? What if Dream knows and he just doesn’t know how to tell me, what to tell me, what if he’s scared to hurt me?”

“I want to tell him, so fucking badly. I hate how this is the one thing I wasn’t able to tell him right away, I hate how he had to be the one person I am too afraid to confess to. I’ve never had an issue with this kind of thing, but now I do, of course, because I feel like this is so much bigger, so much scarier. What happens if it all goes wrong, I can’t handle knowing that it was my fault he left, that he was hurt!”

George was crying, he didn’t even feel it.

“And, you know, even if somehow, magically, he loves me back, I still have no idea of what to do? Would I want a relationship? Fuck, I want nothing more than that, but I’m terrified of it! What if it changes things too much, what if it all goes to shit? Bad, I am so done, I don’t know what to do anymore!”

“I can think up all the scenarios, all the ways I’m going to tell him. But really, when it comes down to it, will I have the balls to say even a half of it? Would I be able to say even a quarter of what I just told you to him? That’s the thing; I don’t know. No matter how much planning I put into this, the moment he so much as looks my way my mouth won’t fucking open! I’ve not had issues with expressing myself around him in so long, not since I started trusting people more, and now I do, and this makes me feel so much guilt. Would he be hurt if he knew how much I’m struggling with the thought of telling him? Would he feel bad, would he feel like he did something wrong to not make me trust him enough? Fuck, I don’t know, and I can’t know unless I tell him, but how do I do it? How?!”

“I want to tell him in person, I want him to see the sincerity in my eyes, but Bad, how should I do that? I can’t just hop on a plane and fly his way, stand before him and tell him how he’s probably the love of my pathetic life?”

“I am so sick of this; I’ve bottled this shit up long enough, I’ve vowed not to cry over him, but would you look at that, at me? Crying, no, sobbing! Alone in my apartment, with you on the line! I bet you have so many better things to do, but you’re here, you listen to me, because fuck, you’re just as much of an amazing person as Dream is. You know I love you, right? Even when I don’t say it? I really hope you know, please you have to know!”

Had he really kept all this in, for so long? Why? George had no idea.

“A-And, I love him, Bad. I am so, so in love with him, it hurts sometimes. But it also feels so amazing, it feels so right, why does it feel so right? It shouldn’t! He’s my best friend, my person, and he doesn’t see me like that, why would he? He can’t, and that’s okay, that’s reasonable, so why the fuck does it still hurt, why does my heart still refuse to see the truth?!”

“I am so tired of this, Bad. I need to tell him, if I don’t, I’ll fucking explode. I can’t keep this in, but I also don’t know how to let him know without anything coming off as wrong, without anything inevitably changing.”

“I have all these embarrassing daydreams with him, oh my God, you’d laugh at me if you knew! I laugh at myself, it’s pathetic! I am so far gone for him, he probably knows, too. Maybe he knows, and feels bad, what if he pities me? Fuck, I’d hate for him to pity me, Bad.”

“And really; what’s the point? He doesn’t need to know all this, doesn’t need to know how desperately I want to be held by him, how much I want to see his face first thing after waking up in the morning. But he needs to know I love him, that I’m in love with him, he deserves nothing but the truth.”

“And even if he left me after; I’d still run after him, like a fool. I’d beg him, on my knees, to stay, because if he were to leave, I’d lose all the dignity I might have had. And at the same time, I’d also let him go, because I can’t fault him for this, for wanting to have me gone. If he was happier without me, fuck, I’d walk out of his life, even if it fucking killed me, that’s how much I love him, Bad, isn’t it ridiculous!”

“I am so exhausted; I lose too much sleep over this. I’m scared this will start to affect our relationship, bit by bit. Shit, he needs to know, as soon as possible! I don’t want to accidentally ruin this; I don’t want us to grow apart.”

“He is prettiest when he laughs, you know? He laughs with his whole face, his mouth, his eyes, his nose. Even his eyebrows, and his cheeks! His face lights up, so prettily, and it makes me want to stop and stare, I can’t fucking breathe! Why is he this beautiful, why does his beauty hurt me? And you know, I want to make him laugh, all the time, because I know how beautiful he looks when he laughs, I want to make that expression appear, even when I’m not around to see it.”

“I- fuck, Bad, I love him so, so much!”, George ended, trying to breathe properly as sobs kept shaking his body.

They stayed silent for a long time after that. George stood up after two minutes and poured himself a glass of water, as he tried to calm his raging heartbeat. Even behind all the hurt, all the worries, he finally felt like he could breathe.

Bad eventually spoke up after five minutes of silence.

“I always knew there was something special about the two of you; the way you guys perfectly fit together. I basically watched you grow up; I saw so many stages of you guys’ friendship. How Dream slowly learned to control his anger, how you slowly came out of your shell, and how you both helped each other with those things, simultaneously. You complement each other so well, I hope you know that, George. If there’s such a thing as soulmates, I’m placing my bet on you two. I see the way you act around each other, there is a tension I myself can’t quite recognize. But really, it feels like you guys are two pieces of one soul.”

George listened, and he felt a new wave of tears fall from his eyes, softer this time.

“Dream loves you, George. He loves you so dearly, I sometimes wonder how he hasn’t simply moved country just to be by your side.”

George let out a small, watery giggle.

He could hear Bad smile in return.

“No matter what happens, George, we are all here for you, and for Dream, too. He loves you too much to leave you, and he knows you too much to assume and misjudge. You guys have an understanding of each other I cannot grasp, it’s like you’re able to communicate telepathically. That’s so special, I’ve never seen anyone have a bond quite like you guys have it.”

He loved Bad, so, so much.

“George? If I was you, I’d just do whatever my heart tells me to. Your heart tells you a lot, I’m sure what you told me today was merely a fraction of what you actually feel and think about every single day. You’ve been by each other’s side for years, you’ve quite literally seen the worst of yourselves, so this? This won’t even affect things in the slightest. As long as you guys are open about it, and talk it through, everything will be okay. You hear me, George? Everything is going to be okay. You guys value each other too much to allow something like this to come between you. Really, George, listen to what your heart tells you. There is not much else you can do, you’ll know when it’s time, there is not a single person in this world that can tell you that besides yourself, not even Dream. And no matter what happens, I’ll always be just one call away, and if it comes down to it, one plane ride away, as well. I love you George, and I love Dream, you guys are like family to me. I want to be able to support you as much as possible. So please, just take a walk outside, maybe visit the beach. Just sit there in silence, and think of scenarios, just like you already do. You’ll know once you stumble across one that feels right. And if not, you can always call me again, and we’ll figure it out together. This doesn’t mean the end of your friendship, George, this is just another obstacle you can overcome, together. Or, who knows, maybe it’s not even an obstacle in the first place. I believe in you guys.”

And George cried again, for a long time. Bad was there for every single tear, whispering words of reassurance to him whenever George needed it.

He was right; George and Dream had been through worse things together. He’d figure it out.

Back during Love or Host, Dream had told him to just follow his heart, and that was exactly what George was going to do.

As he fell asleep with Bad on the call, the latter sighed softly, petting Rat’s head gently.

“Those two muffins better get their shit together.”

___

George decided that it would be a waste of time to just sit around and wallow in self-pity.

Thus, he made sure to visit the beach the very next day.

It was late afternoon, and thankfully, there weren’t many people around. He could see a couple taking a walk a little further down, and he saw an old man sitting on a bench not too far from him. As George turned his head, he noticed that on the opposite side of him, there seemed to be no people at all, so he promptly turned around and walked that way.

The air felt so much lighter and fresher than in the city, even when the sea was literally right next to it. George took off his shoes and started walking along the shore. The water was icy, and it slightly hurt, but at the same time, the goosebumps George felt made him relax a lot more. The sea was very calm that day, the waves were as thin and delicate as spiderwebs with dew pearls threaded through them. It was a beautiful sight. George walked for a long time, he lost track of how long, but by the time he was far away from everyone, the sun was starting to set.

George sighed, leaving the water that now seemed to burn against the soles of his feet.

He walked a little upwards, and seated himself on a lonely wooden bench.

The sight before him was stunning; even when he couldn’t see the full spectrum of colours, sunsets always took his breath away. There was something so enchanting about them, George found that he was unable to look away.

He gazed as the sun painted the sky all kinds of colour variations, the bustle of the city quietly accompanying the show in the background.

George leaned back, looking up at the sky and closing his eyes.

The air was starting to get chilly, and he realized that the cold ceased to bother him for once.

His mind was empty; all he could think of was everything his senses were experiencing.

And then, Dream. Of course, George was surprised that wasn’t the first thing to cross his mind.

How had all of this happened, anyway? How had George gotten to this point, sitting in the cold at the beach, sun setting in the background, thinking about how he was going to face the very thing he dreaded the most?

The call with Bad had helped immensely; George was so grateful the other had taken hours of his time to be there for him, to reassure George and help him out.

In all honestly, George couldn’t wait until he’d be able to thank Bad in person.

But really; the other had been right. After George had let out all of his frustrations, fears and worries, he’d felt so, so much lighter. Lighter than he’d felt in years. And all that was left was the wish for all of this to finally be over; for Dream to finally know.

George had gone through various scenarios in his head; none of them seemed quite right. Sure, he could call Dream, like always, but he worried that something would get lost from his confession, because Dream wasn’t there with him, didn’t see how George felt. The latter had never been the best with words, he needed to show Dream, and he couldn’t do that over the phone. Even with a video call, there would be something that felt off. It felt distant, somewhat impersonal; George didn’t really know why.

If he’d been better with his words, as cheesy and old-fashioned as it was, he would have written Dream a letter. He had his address anyways; they’d often sent each other things back and forth. But the thought alone made George feel uneasy, he didn’t trust himself with being able to convey all that he felt on a piece of paper.

So, it came down to one thing; telling Dream in person. And that, out of all the scenarios, was definitely the hardest and least realistic. Could he just call Dream and all of a sudden announce that he was visiting him? Would that be weird? Dream hadn’t wanted to meet for a long time, George had asked in the past, of course. Not to mention, the one time they had met, it had been for a joke. George didn’t even bother with feeling slight hurt at the fact that Dream had so readily flown over to England for a pizza date with somebody he didn’t even know all too well, but had said no to his best friend asking in the past.

George shook his head; he had to concentrate, not drift off into thinking about things that weren’t as important at the moment.

Bad had told him that he’d figure it out, and if not, he could call the older. But George thought that there wasn’t really anything to figure out. He knew he had to see Dream in person for this, but that was the problem. He didn’t know how to bring it up. If there was one thing they’d been tiptoeing around in their friendship in the past, it was meeting in person. They had managed to meet, but this time would be different, it would be just the two of them, in America. There was no joke, no masquerade, it would be Dream and George and the latter’s feelings for the other. George knew that there wasn’t even any way for an excuse to slide, Dream would know that something had to majorly wrong for George to just fly across the ocean. It wasn’t like he wanted to see the sights, and who else would he meet in Florida, if not Dream?

George tiredly ran his hand over his face, lightly scratching the side of his head. He needed to think about this really well, he had to make some kind of plan, have something prepared to counter Dream’s confusion.

But for now, he had to head back, it was getting really dark and he still had some work to do.

Despite everything, George felt much better. He knew what he had to do, he just had to see how and when to do it.

He hoped that Dream would welcome him warmly.

___

“George? Can you stay on the call with me, please?”, Dream’s quiet voice sounded after they’d finished filming their new video together, attempting to beat Minecraft when everything was pitch black. Sapnap had already disconnected, and George was about to, but he stopped dead in his tracks.

“Sure, what’s up?”, he asked.

“Why don’t you tell me that?”, Dream asked, the emotion in his voice foreign.

George frowned. “What are you talking about?”

Dream sighed. “George, listen; it’s not like I think anything big is up or anything, you seem fine, but then there’s these…moments. Sometimes you just seem to space out randomly, and I feel like you don’t even hear me or Sapnap talking to you?”

George’s breath hitched slightly. “I mean, yeah, I sometimes get a little distracted, is all.”

Dream stayed silent for a while. “I’ve known you for years, George, I know when you’re not telling the whole truth. I’ve said this enough times, but I’ll say it again; you can talk to me, whatever it is, we can get through it together. You don’t have to keep secrets from me, you know?”

George couldn’t help but smile a little. “I know that, Dream, of course I do. It’s just…a little complicated, I guess.”

Dream spoke up immediately. “So, something is up!”

George nodded. “I guess so. But listen, I’ll tell you, Dream, eventually. Okay? It’s something I have to figure out myself first, but believe me, there’s nothing more I want than telling you. But it’s not time yet.”

Dream seemed unsure. “I can respect that. I guess I just don’t really understand why you’re keeping this, whatever it is, from me? You know I’d never judge you.”

“I know, and I will tell you. You know I trust you more than anyone, so of course you’ll get to hear this as soon as possible.”

“Thank you for trusting me, George. Whatever it is, I hope it’s not too bad. If it gets too much, you can also just call me. You don’t have to tell me anything, but I can distract you, if you want? Talk your ears off.”

George chuckled. “I’ll keep that in mind, thank you. It’s nothing insane, don’t worry. I just want to tell you when it feels right.”

“Sure, I can wait. I just hope you’re not suffering alone right now.”

George’s heart skipped a beat. “How can I suffer alone when you’re always by my side, Dream?”

And the other didn’t reply for a while.

George loved this; their silences were never awkward; they were quite the opposite; comfortable.

“I’m glad you know that, George.”, Dream said, voice impossibly soft.

“You’ve never given me any reason to doubt you.”, George replied just as softly, heart beating a tad bit faster.

“And I’ll keep it that way. Hang in there, George, and if you get too sad, you can just watch us being gay compilations on YouTube to cheer you up!”, Dream answered, back to teasing.

They always fell back into their rhythm so easily.

“You’re such an idiot.”, George giggled, covering his mouth with his hand, even when Dream couldn’t see him.

“Only for you, Georgie. But hey, I’m sure you’re tired, it’s bedtime for you already. Go drink some water and rest, we can talk tomorrow.”, Dream said, sighing softly right after.

George felt incredibly warm. “I will, you, too. Let’s talk tomorrow.”

Dream was definitely smiling. “Thanks, George. Good night, love you!”

“Good night, Dream.”

___

George hovered the cursor over the purchase button.

He bit his lip, unsure of himself.

This was a big step; was he ready to take it?

Part of him thought it was long overdue, the other believed it to be way too early.

George truly wished to have some sort of confidence, some sort of courage at the moment. He’d heard Dream the day prior; he’d sounded genuinely concerned. And George totally understood why; he was acting weird. For years, he’d had no issue telling Dream any of his worries, so he must have been so confused that George suddenly withheld something from him. And Dream, ever-so-kind, didn’t push him, didn’t demand any answers. He probably sensed George’s uneasiness; he was so thoughtful. Somehow, he’d managed to convince George that this was the best solution, in the end.

Because really; what else should he have done? It wasn’t like Dream was blissfully unaware, he knew that George was going through something he couldn’t help him with. George didn’t even want to imagine how confused Dream must have been, how worried. And George? He was hurting. Those last few weeks were some of the worst he’d had in terms of emotional well-being. He felt bad for not confiding in Dream, for the other’s sake, but also his own. Hiding something this big from Dream felt incredibly wrong, he felt like he was somehow going behind his friend’s back, especially considering that this ordeal actually involved him.

George had found a ticket that would bring him to Dream in two days’ time. It was a pretty small timeframe, and George wondered if it was too small. Already, he felt like he wouldn’t be able to sleep, the nerves were getting to him, and he hadn’t even bought the ticket yet. How could he, when he’d be face to face with Dream again, this time just the two of them, with an intent behind it that could change a lot in their course of friendship? A good amount of sleep was not an option.

For a short moment, he considered calling Dream again. And really, why not? The other had offered his support, so George was going to take just that.

“George?”

“Hi, Dream.”, George replied quietly.

“Something’s up? It’s pretty late.”

“Oh, sorry. I forgot it must be your bedtime already.”

Dream snorted. “I’m an adult, I don’t have a bedtime anymore. Doesn’t even matter, I’d break every rule for you, anyway. So, what’s up?”

George was not blushing. “Have you ever thought that you’re acting irrationally when you did something you’ve been planning to do for a long time?”

Dream thought about it. “No, I don’t think so. If you’ve been thinking about it carefully, how irrational can it really be?”

George shrugged. “That’s the thing, I don’t know. It seems pretty reasonable, but like, I somehow feel like it’s still irrational, in a way.”

Dream hummed. “Is it a big thing, then? Something really important?”

“Yeah, you could say that.”

“Got it. Well, unless you’re in some sort of delusional state about to execute your carefully constructed murder plan on your ex’s new fling, I don’t think it’s that big of a deal.”

How could he even say that in all seriousness?

“Dream! You know that’s not the kind of irrational I mean!”

The younger chuckled. “Of course, I do, idiot. No, but really; you’re a smart dude, George, if this has been on your mind for a while, and you’ve carefully evaluated it, like I know you definitely did, you and your overthinking everything issue-“

Dream ignored George’s protests.

“-as I was saying; you’ve got this. If it’s been a while and you still haven’t found a better solution, I trust that you have got the right one.”

“What if this is about me sending you cat poop?”

“I’d welcome that package happily into my home, Georgie, and put it riiight where your portrait is hanging on my wall, I’ll light some candles and put on a compilation of you screaming in the background while I quietly thank the Blood God for this kind gift.”

“You’re so weird.”

“Says the one who’s sending me cat poop.”

“I’m not fucking sending you cat poop, Dream, it was a joke!”

“And you think mine wasn’t? As if I’d pray to the Blood God-“

“What about the portrait?”

“None of your business, nimrod.”

“Rude.”

“Thanks. Anyways, for real, though; you got this, George, I’m sure you made the right decision.”

“Fuck, I hope that, too, a lot…”, George sighed, sitting down on his bed.

Dream hummed. “Is this about that issue you’re going through right now?”

George didn’t even hesitate. “Yeah. Don’t worry about it, I’ll tell you soon enough.”

Dream chuckled. “Don’t stress yourself, you must have a reason for not saying anything, I can respect that. Just don’t go around being all secretive now, I’d feel like I’m failing as a friend.”

“You’re not failing in any way; you’re actually excelling right now. Congrats, Mr. Dream, you’ve earned yourself a gold star!”

“A gold star? From GeorgeNotFound himself? Oh, what a jolly day.”

“Stop that, ew.”

“You love it.”

“I hate it.”

“Whatever, I have my gold star, I don’t need you anymore.”

“Sure, then don’t come crawling back to me when you start to miss me.”

“I’d never miss you, that’s weirdchamp.”

“Please stop talking.”

“Make me.”

George was absolutely blushing. “Shut up.”

“Awww, did I make our little Georgie flustered again? Oh, applaud my supremacy.”

“You’re so stupid.”

“You love me.”

“Whatever.”

“You dooooo! Come on, say it!”

“No.”

Dream was definitely pouting. “Oh, come on now! I know you love me, just say it!”

George licked his lips nervously. “…no.”

Dream sighed exaggeratedly. “I am so, so hurt, George, so hurt. My very own best friend, my very own Minecraft boyfriend-“

“I’m not your Minecraft boyfriend.”

“You, my friend, are a liar who lies.”

“Whatever floats your boat, Dream. I am done with this conversation.”

Why did Dream always find a way to make him so incredibly flustered?

“I am done with your denial, George. Just accept that you love me and I am absolutely your Minecraft boyfriend. For the time being, I’ll let you off the hook. You have been granted a few hours of time to think this through, I shall ring you when the time runs out.”

“Got it, now go to sleep. Don’t piss the bed again.”

“GEORGE-“

He hung up on him. George had a smug expression on his face.

1:0 for George.

Needless to say, George bought the ticket.

­­­___

George looked out the window, and all he saw was a sea of clouds.

The plane’s persistent buzzing was slowly starting to fade since George was getting more and more used to it.

The music in his ears was calming him down a bit, even after having flown a couple of times, George still got a little nervous on plane rides.

It had only been a couple of hours; he still had more than five to get through.

The movie selection seemed a little scarce, which lead to George just giving up on it and leaning his head against the back of the chair, closing his eyes. Maybe he’d be able to fall asleep. He’d been lucky enough to land a seat alone, no one else was sitting beside him. He enjoyed the calmness, and the people in front of him were very quiet, thankfully. Somewhere in the back of the plane, he could make out an infant crying, but it wasn’t too bad since his music was louder, anyway.

George sighed, trying to make himself fall asleep. As predicted, he’d struggled with that the past few days leading up to the flight. But really, could anyone have blamed him for it? He was on his way to meet his best friend, unannounced, and to top it all off, he was going to confess his endlessly profound love to said friend. If that wasn’t a valid reason to lose some sleep over.

His friends had noticed that something was off; even Sapnap had messaged him, asking if he was good.

He’d been a bit slower than usual, and a bit more fidgety. Thankfully, he hadn’t streamed during those two days, people would have had countless of questions about the dark circles under his eyes. Speaking of which; those definitely wouldn’t be getting better, because now he also had to deal with the jetlag. Really, he was on his way to meet Dream in person, all while he looked like death himself. Ridiculous.

George had talked to Dream a couple of times after he’d booked the ticket, the younger had absolutely picked up on the sudden mood shift.

George may have been tired, he may have been nervous and scared, but above all, he was incredibly happy. Finally, after months’ worth of longing, he’d be able to see Dream. That thought alone made George extremely giddy, he was excited.

For at least a few days, he’d be able to spend time with Dream, for real this time. And he’d get to meet Patches!

Not to mention, George had always been curious about Florida, he hoped that Dream would maybe show him around a little.

Before hopping on the plane, George had thought long and hard about how he’d handle just appearing in front of Dream’s doorstep. It felt rude; just barging in like that. George knew that he was always welcome in Dream’s house, as the younger was in his, but this still seemed like a boundary he was hesitant to cross.

So, George had booked himself a nice hotel. The only downside was that now, he had the perfect place to escape to. George worried that once he’d enter the hotel room, let everything settle in and have the weight of the matter crash on him, he’d be too scared to leave again. Would he be able to convince himself to go out, and knock on Dream’s door?

One thing was for sure; Dream didn’t have any visitors, at least not any that George knew of. He was glad about that, because he didn’t want to potentially intrude on Dream’s time with his family and friends. There might still have been some unpleasant surprises, but that was just the risk George would be taking.

It was too late, anyways; he was on his way. George would be landing in Florida soon enough, and he was both terrified and over-the-moon.

But before he could worry even further, he finally managed to fall asleep to the music sounding in his ears.

His sleep was dreamless, but soon, George wouldn’t be.

___

His hotel room was pretty plain; a king-sized bed and a few extra furniture. It was nice, though, George thought it was pretty cosy.

He’d landed only an hour ago, it had taken him a while to get to the hotel room in the first place. The traffic had been pretty bad, but George didn’t really mind, he loved looking outside the window and taking in all of the new impressions. Thus far, he really liked Florida; it gave him a good feeling, the atmosphere felt nice, even with the state’s infamous reputation.

George managed a tired smile as he put his suitcase next to the dresser. He had a pretty big window overlooking the city, but the curtains were drawn. George walked over and opened them, and was met with the stunning sight of thousands of lights blinking in the dark. Orlando was really pretty at night.

Already, George’s brain was a little tired and confused, the jetlag was starting to set in. He’d left from London in the early evening, so it must have been early morning by now. In Orlando, however, it was barely midnight, and George realized that this was going to cause him a lot of headaches.

Before he could even think any more, he quickly got ready for bed, and fell unconscious as soon as he hit the covers.

That night, George had the most rest he’d had in days.

___

George’s phone was buzzing loudly, and he grumpily picked it up, eyes still half closed and mind not quite awake.

Someone was calling him.

He groaned and put his phone back on the nightstand, turning around and trying to fall back asleep.

The phone started buzzing again.

George couldn’t bring himself to listen to the sound any longer, so he lazily turned around and picked up his phone, holding it against his ear.

“M’what?”, he asked, words slurred.

“George? Are you still sleeping?”, Dream’s cheerful voice cut in.

“Ye.”

“George, I knew your sleep schedule was pretty bad, but isn’t it like afternoon for you?”

“Dunno.”

“Wow, you really are half asleep, aren’t you? And here I was, trying to invite you to play some Among Us with Sapnap, Bad and I!”, Dream tried to tempt, and failed.

“M’tired.”

“I can hear that. Dude, what did you do yesterday? Did you party or something?”

“Nah.”

“You usually wake up earlier though, are you okay?”

“M’okay.”

“Come on, Georgie, work with me here!”, Dream tried, softer this time.

“Dreeeeeam, m’tired, let m’sleep.”, George slurred, mind slowly waking up.

“But the guys are waiting! And Sapnap bet $5 with me that you wouldn’t play with us because you’d be sleeping, come on, don’t make me lose $5!”

“Is’not m’problem.”

“Oh Geeeeorge.”, Dream started, voice smug.

Suddenly, George was a lot more awake.

“Wot.”

“C’mere, George!”, Dream said, louder this time.

“Don’t,” George warned, voice low, “not this early in the mornin’, Dream.”

“It’s not morning anymore, so get your ass up and come play with us. The guys are worried about you, and so am I, I feel like you need some distraction right now.”

George sighed. “Alright, alright. Gimme like, five minutes.”

“Got it. I’ll call then, if you’re not ready by that time, I’m hunting you down.”

“K.”

After they hung up, George got out of bed, and went straight into the bathroom. He looked exhausted; hair totally dishevelled, skin paler than usual and dark bags under his eyes. Wow, what a sight for sore eyes.

He got ready as quickly as he could, before sitting back onto his bed, pulling out his laptop and starting the game.

Dream, as promised, called again.

“Ready, George?”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“Perfect!”

Needless to say, Dream still hunted him down, but in Among Us, thankfully.

___

It had been three days.

George was starting to go mad in that hotel room; but he also couldn’t find it in himself to just leave.

Why was he such a coward? He trusted Dream more than anyone, and here he was, scared the other would be angry at him.

Thinking irrationally was George’s new brand.

It was the evening of his third day in Florida, and he still hadn’t been face-to-face with his best friend. And why? Because he wanted to bail last minute.

But he’d paid for an expensive ticket, had gathered the courage and had flown all the way over to America, had booked a hotel room that wasn’t cheap either, so all things considered, it would be absolutely stupid of him to just fly back without another word.

But most importantly, this wasn’t just about him. George knew Dream was worried about him, and the other deserved to know.

Not only that, but the guilt George felt immediately after Dream said something flirtatious to him and he ate it up, was too much to handle. Dream had to know, no matter what, even if George was to die from mortification.

George needed reassurance, which is why he whipped out his phone and called Bad right away.

“Hello, George! What a nice surprise.”, the other said.

“Hi, Bad. I, um, kind of have something to confess.”

“Oh dear, is this about Dream?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you tell him?”

“No, that’s the problem.”

“Why, what’s wrong?”

George took a deep breath. “I’m in Florida.”

Bad stayed silent for a while. “You what?”

“I’m in Florida, Bad, I’ve been here for like three days already.”

“You actually flew all the way over here?”

“Duh, you told me to follow my heart, and I quite literally did.”

“Yeah, no, I get that. It’s just…I guess I expected you to like, call him?”

George smiled sadly. “Wouldn’t have worked, you know I’m not the best with words. I’d probably say a lot of bullshit and hang up on him. No, not happening,”

Bad sighed. “I see, well, you’re here already, it’s not like you can change anything.”

“Mhm.”

“So, you’re with Dream right now?”

“No.”

“You’re confusing me, George.”

George looked down at his feet. “I’m confused myself, Bad. I’m too scared to actually meet him now.”

“But you guys have met before!”

“Yeah, but this is different. I guess I’m worried he’s not going to be happy to see me?”

George could practically hear Bad’s eyeroll. “For the love of-, okay, listen here, George; He won’t just be happy, he’ll be over the moon. How many times has he tried to fly you out to Florida? How many times has he hinted at wanting to meet you again? I’m telling you; he’ll probably cry happy tears and stare at a wall for a few minutes. There is literally no reason for you to be as nervous as you are. And George, you don’t have to confess right away, either. Do whatever feels right, just use this opportunity to spend some quality time with your best friend.”

George bit his lip. “You’re right, I guess I’m overthinking too much again. I don’t like showing up unannounced.”

“Then announce yourself!”

“Don’t wanna, that would ruin the surprise.”

Bad huffed. “You’re impossible. How about you hint at it, though?”

George thought about it.

“Good idea, thanks Bad!”

“No problem, you muffinhead.”

___

“Florida’s my favourite state to visit.”

“What?”

George internally face-palmed. So much for subtleness.

“I mean, um, Florida’s pretty cool.”

“I guess so. Wait, you’ve been to Florida before?!”

“Eh, noo?”

Dream frowned. “But you just said it’s your favourite state to visit!”

“Well, yeah, someday!”, George answered defensively.

Dream wheezed. “Awww, Georgie! It’s because of me, isn’t it? That’s so cute!”

George hadn’t planned that. “No, idiot, it’s because of Drew Gooden.”

“What does he have to do with this?”

“He’s funny.”

“You don’t even know him.”

“What if I do?”

Dream sighed. “I’ll just leave you to it, George, I have no idea what’s going on right now.”

“Nothing, can’t I appreciate a place?”

“You can, but why do you have to be so awkward about it?”

“I’m not awkward about it! You’re the one who’s making it awkward!”

“Sure, George. But yes, Florida’s a special place to visit. You should, sometime, we can wear our socks and have some fun!”

“Dream!”

“What?”, Dream wheezed.

“Stop being weird.”, George blushed.

“I’m just being honest. It’s you who has the dirty mind!”

“Whatever.”

Albeit unsuccessfully, he’d hinted at it.

Come to think of it, George visiting now would probably be even weirder.

Whatever.

___

There was no turning back now.

There he was, in front of Dream’s house. He’d seen the place a few times before; Dream had bombarded him with pictures when he’d first bought it. It was even prettier in person; George was glad that Dream had managed to buy himself such a nice house, especially at such a young age. He’d worked hard for his success, and he deserved every last bit of it.

It was late afternoon; the air was incredibly humid, and it was oddly warm for a day in November. But George couldn’t really focus much on that, anyway, not when his hands were slightly shaking due to nervousness.

This was it then, wasn’t it? Months’ worth of careful evaluation, of dreams and nightmares, of fears and worries, of joy and anticipation. He was about to look into Dream’s eyes again, but this time, there would be some many things going unspoken between them. For the time being, at least.

George took a deep breath, closing his eyes and trying to figure out how to make his voice not break.

He gently raised his hand, about to knock, when the door swung open, and he was suddenly face-to-face with Dream himself.

His eyes grew wide, and Dream mirrored his expression, albeit a lot more intensely.

George’s heart threatened to burst out of his chest, and his knees started to go a little weak.

They were standing there, oddly close to each other, the gentle bustle of the city and the quiet sound of cars passing by in the background.

George found that he couldn’t speak, his throat had closed off. He stared at his best friend, and Dream stared back, looking like a deer caught in headlights.

George didn’t know how long they stayed like that, holding their breaths and looking at each other in disbelief.

George went through a plethora of emotions before he saw Dream’s mouth open, almost comically and in slow-motion.

“George?”


	2. Late Night Emotions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW;
> 
> internalized homophobia (mainly the first flashback/text in italics)

_“In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.” -Jane Austen_

___

“So, what do you do for a living?”, she asked.

Dream sighed. “I do YouTube.”

Her eyebrows shot up. “YouTube? Really? What kind of videos?”

Was she really curious, or did she try her hardest to keep the shallow conversation going? Dream didn’t know, and he didn’t care all that much.

“I play video games, Minecraft, to be exact.”, he replied, looking back at the menu.

She hummed. “Oh, that’s quite cool, I guess. I’ve never played it before.”

“You should try, it’s fun.”

She smiled. “Maybe you can teach me how to play sometime?”

Dream looked at her. She was pretty; incredibly so. Long black hair, gentle features, strikingly dark eyes. She held herself with a certain elegance; maybe she was a dancer, Dream hadn’t bothered to ask. Her voice was very nice to listen to, and she was a great conversationalist. Not to mention; from what Dream picked up on, she was also incredibly intelligent, her educational history spoke for itself. She seemed to have many interests, and her personality seemed very engaging.

So really, she was great, Dream wondered how he’d even gotten to go on a date with her, she seemed like someone way out of his league.

And this? This was the perfect opportunity. She had basically just asked him out on a second date, one where they could bond over something he enjoyed. She seemed interested in what he did, in what he liked. And Dream? Despite everything, he couldn’t say the same.

“Maybe.”

Her smile faltered for the briefest of moments, and her eyes looked a little sad. “Got it.”

They spent the next few minutes in silence, deciding on what to eat.

Truthfully, Dream was just staring at the menu for the most part, he spaced out way too often, to pick out food seemed like a chore, for some odd reason. He tried to decide on something he’d already eaten, but all the meals seemed way too fancy, and he wondered if he could just ask for something simpler that wasn’t technically on the menu.

“These food combinations are quite…extraordinary.”, she said as she softly smiled at her menu.

Dream hummed in agreement. “True that, I don’t even know what ‘Sausage Ragù over Creamy Polenta’ is supposed to be.”

She chuckled. “Me, either. I don’t know most these fancy ingredients.”

“Yeah, all the cooking experience I have is making fast meals at home that would make a chef’s eyes bleed at the simplicity and sheer lack of skill or taste.”, Dream admitted, smiling softly to himself. Those meals were rubbish, but he loved them, regardless.

She giggled. “Oh well, I’m quite the chef myself, if I’m being honest. I really enjoy experimenting with food, and I especially love cooking for friends.”

“That’s nice, I bet they appreciate it.”

“They do, but I can never hear the end of them joking about how I’m basically their mom.”, she said with a fond look in her eyes.

Dream smiled. “I have a friend like that, too, he’s never cooked for us but he pretty much is our mother figure at this point.”

“That’s so sweet, every friend group needs a mom friend, and I am honoured to take on this role for mine.”

“Agreed.”

They ended up picking the simplest dish they could find. The conversation was a little bumpy, one party was clearly trying much harder than the other. Dream tried to change the topics sometimes, and she always readily complied, talking and asking him questions in return. As the evening went on, Dream found himself liking her more and more. Just not in the way he wanted to.

“Hey, can I ask you something?”, she spoke up after they had been served their dessert. Amedei Chocolate Mousse or something.

“Sure.”, he answered, looking into her eyes.

“Do you even want to be here?”, she asked, sounding soft rather than angry.

Dream’s eyes widened a little. “Why are you asking that?”

She played with the drink in her hand. “It’s just that, well, you’ve been distant all night. And I am usually good at reading people, but with you, I’m so confused. I can’t figure out whether you’re just incredibly socially awkward or you’d rather be anywhere else than here.”

Dream felt bad, really bad. He knew he hadn’t been the best date; scratch that, he’d been the worst. She’d clearly tried to open up to him all night, kind and forthcoming, and all he’d done was the bare minimum. He had his reasons, of course, but she didn’t know that, and if Dream was being honest with himself, even with all the things considered, she still didn’t deserve this treatment. She was incredible, and he was an asshole.

She sighed. “You know, I don’t want to force you do to anything. If you’re not interested, you can just be honest with me, I won’t be mad at you, I’d actually appreciate it. I really like you, Clay, but I don’t think you like me.”

Dream bit his lip. “You’re a great person, I like you. I just-“

She smiled sadly. “You just?”

Dream sighed. “I just don’t like you in the way you’d want me to. I’m sorry.”

She shook her head gently. “Don’t apologize, that’s what first dates are for, aren’t they? Getting to know each other and then determining if you are interested in the other or not?”

Dream nodded. “Yeah, but I still feel bad. I’m sorry, I just don’t think I can do this.”

She smiled. “You don’t have to, as disappointing as it is. I can’t blame you; sometimes things just don’t work out.”

Dream felt embarrassed. “I’m still a douchebag, though. I hope you don’t hate me too much.”

She laughed a little. “No, you’re too cute for me to hate you. And hey, I’ve been in your position before, who am I to judge?”

Dream smiled. “Thank you for being so kind, whoever ends up with you will be a lucky person.”

She hummed. “I’m just being honest. And thank you, Clay, that’s a very sweet thing to say. I feel like this is the most genuine I’ve seen you all evening.”

Dream looked at her sheepishly. “Yeah, I’m just-, forget it, it doesn’t matter. Let’s just enjoy this for the time being, and part on good terms?”

She laughed. “Count me in.”

And thus, the rest of the evening went smoothly. Dream really liked her, she was easy to get along with, not to mention incredibly understanding. After having talked about the elephant in the room, Dream felt like there was a weight lifted off his chest, and he could finally be himself, at least a little. She knew what was up, he didn’t have to pretend any longer.

Their date ended well, and they parted on good terms, as planned. He didn’t get her number; maybe it was better that way. Dream just hoped that the next person she’d go on a date with would treat her like a queen, just like she deserved, and do the absolute opposite of what he did.

He got into his car, the air outside was a lot more chilly than usual. He closed the door and sighed, looking straight ahead. Why did everything have to be this complicated?

Dream had tried to go on so many dates in the past; not a single one had ever led anywhere. And he knew exactly why; it was because of George.

Well, not George directly. It was rather Dream’s stupid feelings for his best friend preventing him from finding any interest in literally any other person.

It was starting to get old; every date ended the same, with the other person either leaving without another word, or storming off angrily. And it was all Dream’s fault.

He was lazy, disinterested and bored, of course everyone picked up on it. Some mentioned it right away, others stayed silent, but they gave him telling looks. Dream pretended to be oblivious to it all.

It was shitty; because he couldn’t stop. This was the only way for him to potentially get over himself, to maybe find someone who he’d want to be with.

But then again, every person he met he immediately compared to George. They were pretty? George was so much prettier. They were funny? George made him laugh a lot harder. They were sweet? George was the sweetest. They had an amazing personality? George had the best. They had a great body? George’s was shaped by the Gods. They shared interests with Dream? Well, so did George. The list went on and on, and Dream found himself thinking about George more than half of the time.

It was rude of him, he knew that. But it wasn’t like Dream was actively doing it, it was something that happened naturally, unconsciously.

And who could have blamed him? He’d only ever seen George for so many years, the only person possibly catching his attention would have to be some form of a George clone. It was sad, and Dream knew, he tried his best to get over his best friend, it just never worked out.

He went on dates with both girls and guys; but Dream found that the comparison issue would be at its worst when he tried to date guys. There was always something that reminded him of George when he looked at them, he never saw them for who they were, he looked for George in them, and no one else. Sometimes, their hair would remind Dream of George. Or their voice, their laugh, their eyes, literally their anything. And at the same time, whenever he found a similarity with George, he always brushed it off right away, because they weren’t as good as George, they could never be, they could never compare.

Sometimes, he went on dates with people who were seemingly going through the same issue as him. That one time, he’d gone a date with a girl who’d had her engagement broken off only a few months prior. He saw the hurt in her eyes whenever he looked, he saw the stiffness in her limbs and he felt the devastating atmosphere around her. That date was the one where Dream had probably been the most genuine and caring, it had ended with him comforting her for hours, rather than them getting to know each other. But he’d managed to make her smile, and that had made him happier than anything else. He hoped that she was okay, wherever she was, and that she’d end up finding happiness. He hoped that he would, too.

His dates had become a lot more frequent after George’s Love or Host, it was probably because that show had been somewhat of a wakeup call for him.

Dream had thought long and hard about what to do; he had thought about confessing to George. But there was one single, scary thing holding him back;

The fear of making George uncomfortable.

The older had always been weird with affection, he didn’t necessarily give it out to everyone, and also not all the time. When they’d met up, Dream had only gotten one hug from George, and after that, the other had refrained from any form of physical affection. And verbal? George had never been one to announce his love openly and freely.

Dream knew that George would be his friend, still, he knew that he’d be understanding. But the thought alone that George might be uncomfortable with the implications, might get weird whenever Dream would joke with him, hurt more than Dream cared to admit.

George wasn’t weak, and he didn’t need protection. But for some reason, Dream felt as if the older being uncomfortable with him was the worst-case scenario. That feeling was so odd; it felt weird and unpleasant, it wasn’t distinctly negative, but it was certainly not positive. It would be looming over their friendship; others would pick up on it. People would probably put pressure on George, would demand for him to talk about it. And that? That would make George feel even worse, and who was Dream to cause these chain reactions? No matter how he thought of it, in every single scenario George ended up in a situation that put pressure on him, burdened him, and that was the last thing Dream wanted the other to experience. So, Dream decided that he’d rather carry the burden himself, and he felt assured every single time George and him jokingly flirted, and he was the only one feeling heaviness in his heart. It was better that way; George didn’t deserve to feel all the things Dream did whenever something started to feel much too real.

Dream had decided, in the end, that he would confess under one condition; George finding love. If one day, George called him and told him that he’d met a nice girl and him and her were dating, Dream would start planning for the perfect moment to tell George. To Dream, confessing wasn’t a means to get what he wanted, rather, it was a way to find closure. He knew that people confessed in hopes of the other person reciprocating, but Dream had given up on that fantasy a long time ago. There was no need for him to confess, no urgency, since George would never love him the same way, anyway.

But Dream felt guilty; whenever he’d feel his heart beat faster, his cheeks grow pink, his breath hitch and his knees buckle. He felt guilty about the dreams he had with his best friend, and the nightmares, the scenarios he thought up in his head. He felt guilty for his reveries and his desire, he felt guilty for all the silent pleas he sent George’s way, without the other noticing. He felt guilty about how truthful he was being whenever he told George that he looked handsome, that he was great, that he loved him. It felt like he was imposing; like he was somehow taking advantage of George and his unawareness.

Dream was able to live with this, with these feelings, but he was only so strong. If George was to love someone, Dream would feel like the worst person wishing to be by George’s side instead of them. Even when Dream would never try to interfere with George’s happiness, his relationships, he’d still feel like he did, somehow, just by feeling everything he felt.

So, Dream made sure to promise to himself that once George found someone, he’d tell him. He would tell him, and he’d finally be able to move on in peace, hopefully.

George would be too happy and distracted to really understand the weight of Dream’s words, he’d just view this as Dream admitting to a small crush. Dream preferred it that way, there was really no need for George to truly know how deep his feelings actually went. Maybe the other would tease him a little, Dream would hate it, but he’d be glad about George’s light-heartedness, either way.

And George’s partner? Dream hoped that she’d understand that him confessing would be to end things, not start anything. He’d forever hate himself it he ever caused problems for George.

Because, God, Dream loved George. He’d been in love with him for literal years, it felt weird thinking about a reality where this wasn’t the case. They’d always been Dream and George, ever since they’d met back when they were teenagers. George was the shy, awkward kid that had a heart bigger than anyone could ever measure, and Dream was the loud clumsy kid that was helplessly in love with the other. They really were a cliché, in a way. They were the only cliché Dream adored.

No matter what, they’d stay friends, their lives were too intertwined, their souls too interlocked, and their future too interconnected for it all to just stop all of a sudden, and because of something as small as this.

So really, Dream was trying his hardest already. Maybe, just maybe, someday he’d go on a date with somebody that would sweep him right off his feet, and help him finally let go of George. Maybe, eventually, Dream would find his own happiness.

But for the time being, all those dates served as nothing but mockery. Dream would look at some of the most interesting people he’d ever met, and he’d look right past them, right through them.

Not to mention, in an odd way, these dates felt like cheating. Dream knew it was ridiculous, but he couldn’t help feeling horrible, it felt like he was somehow betraying George, he felt dirty. It was so irrational, him and George were friends, they were not in a relationship, there was not even a single possibility that Dream was cheating on him. But it felt like it, and it would always make Dream become even more distant, even more disinterested.

Why was it so hard to get over George? Dream was lonely, he wanted to have something special with someone, but his love for George kept him from opening his heart. Not that he had it, anyways, his heart had always been with George, anyway. You don’t choose who you fall in love with, you choose who you love. Did Dream just keep choosing George, over and over again, even when he tried not to? Did he not realize, or did he refuse to see?

Was he ever going to get over George, or would a part of him always love the other, even as he moved on? Dream had no idea, and he didn’t even want to know.

Dream realized all of a sudden, that he was still in the parking lot of the restaurant. But now, there were a lot less cars, it was empty except for his and two other vehicles.

Dream wondered if his date was already home safely, he’d offered to drive her home, but she’d said that she was there with her car, anyway.

Would he ever see her again? Dream doubted it. Under different circumstances, he would have loved for them to be friends. But he knew that it was selfish, he’d seen the interest she had in him, and even when she tried to mask it, he knew she’d been disappointed and hurt about the outcome of their date. Dream couldn’t fault her, but he also couldn’t find it in himself to truly care.

Sighing, he pulled out his phone, quickly dialling George’s number. He needed to hear him, he needed to know that the other was still there, happy and content, so Dream could sleep at night.

“Hello?”

“Hi, George.”, Dream said softly, closing his eyes and leaning his head against the car seat.

“Oh, hi Dream! What’s up?”, George sounded happy to hear him, Dream’s chest felt just a tad bit warmer.

“Oh, nothing much. I just wanted to kill some time.”, he answered.

“Pff, then why do you call me? Am I just a distraction to you? I am hurt, Dream, so hurt.”

Dream chuckled. “You know that’s not true, idiot, now stop pouting and entertain me.”

“I am not your jester.”

“Of course, you aren’t, but you’re my best friend and I honestly just need you to talk to me.”, he replied, and maybe he sounded way too genuine, way too vulnerable, because George immediately changed his tone.

“Are you okay? Did something happen?”

“Nah, it’s just been a long day, don’t worry.”

George seemed unsure. “I’ll just believe you, but you know you can talk to me, right?”

Dream smiled. “Of course, that’s literally what I’m doing right now.”

George seemed deep in thought for a while. “Wanna play some Minecraft together? Maybe that will help.”

Dream shook his head slightly. Why was he so tired all of a sudden? “I’m not home right now, maybe some other time?”

“Of course.”, George replied. “But is there anything else I can do for you?”

Dream thought about it. “Yeah, actually. Tell me about your day.”

George was probably frowning. “That’s it?”

Dream sighed. “Yep. I’d really appreciate it, George.”

“If you say so.”, the other replied, and started telling him about his day.

Dream listened, smile ever-present on his lips. George’s day seemed to have gone great, and as the other started to get invested in his own story, Dream brought his hand up to where his heart was beating, and gently placed it there, feeling it beat against his palm. He felt it pick up whenever George did something especially adorable, and he felt it calm whenever George would speak to him more softly, offering his comfort.

Dream felt a single tear escape his eye, and he let it happen. Sitting there, in his car in an almost empty parking lot at night, listening to his best friend rant about his day, Dream felt like there wasn’t an entire ocean between them, he felt like George was right there with him, right by his side. It felt like whatever was going to be thrown their way, they’d duck, and just continue on as if nothing ever happened. George was the embodiment of peace to Dream, there was no one or nothing else that could make him feel this calm and safe. Dream wished that George would talk forever, that the night would never end. He wanted to feel his heart beating for George with his palm, he wanted to smile a lot longer. This, he thought, would be a wonderful moment to be stuck in forever, at least for him. He knew it wasn’t the same for George, he didn’t want to lock the other in with him.

“Thank you, Georgie, you always make me feel better.”, Dream said quietly, watching as the last car left the parking lot.

“And I’ll keep doing that, Dream. Just give me a call whenever you feel bad?”, George answered just as quietly, just as gently.

George only ever spoke this softly to Dream, the latter had never heard the other use this tone with anyone else. Well, maybe he did in private, but Dream liked to think he was special, he liked to pretend.

“Of course, as if I’d be strong enough not to.”

George stayed silent, and Dream decided to leave it at that.

“I’ll have to hang up now, I need to get home.”, he said after a while.

“Where even are you? It must be so late for you, why are you some place alone at night?”, George sounded worried.

“Don’t worry about it, I just had some things to do, and it ended up being later than planned.”, why was he unable to just tell George that he’d been on a date? What was holding him back?

“I hope you are not doing stupid things.”, George said quietly.

Dream chuckled. “Who do you think I am, some bad boy? George, it’s literally me you’re talking about, I’m too anxious to walk alone at night.”

George chuckled, too, relieved. “I’ll quote you on that. But seriously, stay safe, I don’t want to get a call one day that you’ve become the head of a drug empire and need my help to outsmart the police chasing you.”

Dream wheezed. “You’re an idiot.”

George was definitely smiling. “Maybe I am, and what about it?”

Dream sighed contently, grabbing his car key to start the car. “Stay the way you are, dumbass, that’s the you I love the most.”

“You’re so cheesy.”

“Only for you.”

They laughed, said their goodbyes, and George hung up first, like he always did.

Dream stared at his phone, shaking his head lightly. What was he going to do with himself?

Starting the car, he quickly looked around, and began to drive away. Luckily, his house wasn’t too far away, and traffic seemed a lot less than usual.

Dream started to look forward to cuddling with Patches and ending the night with him watching something on his PC. No matter how tired he was, Dream thought that he wouldn’t be able to sleep too well tonight, his heart was still beating fast in his chest, and his mind was still filled with George’s gentle laugh.

Sometimes, he felt sad about his situation, maybe even pity. But above all, he was glad to have George in his life, in whatever way he could. He’d get over himself, he believed in it dearly.

George’s happiness had always been Dream’s number one priority, and he intended to keep it that way.

He just hoped he wouldn’t hurt too much because of it.

___

The room was pitch black. Curtains drawn, not even the smallest of lights flickering anywhere.

Dream had his eyes closed; his phone was playing some calm song; he’d already forgotten the name of it.

His day had been insanely stressful; a lot to plan and manage, so many ideas to discuss. He’d been cramped with work from morning until night, and finally, he could relax.

Nights were his favourite time of day; it was so quiet and peaceful, the world was asleep and no one could barge in, no one could disrupt him. For hours, there would be nothing but silence, and Dream felt like he was capable of anything and everything, the nightly atmosphere always allowed for his thoughts to flow freely, the constant stress of the day long gone, he was left with feeling like he had all the time in the world, and all the inspiration the universe was able to offer.

During nights like these, Dream would get his best ideas. About half of said ideas for his videos and for the SMP occurred to him in the middle of the night, hidden by the darkness of his room, away from anyone able to bring him back to reality.

And yet, not everything was positive. As much as his creativity flourished, the thoughts he was usually able to drown out would resurface, and in the dark, he’d have no way to silence them. They’d flow like everything else, and Dream knew there was nothing he could do about it.

Most of the time, those thoughts weren’t exactly thoughts, they were memories. Good and bad.

Dream had been thinking about George a lot more than he usually did; it felt like the other never left his mind in the first place.

Most of all, Dream remembered. The memories of their shared past surprised him at the most random of moments, and it would always be enough to make him halt for just a little.

Dream had known George for a long time; they’d been through a lot together. Sometimes, it was easy to forget how much the other actually knew about him, how well he could read him, and how there’d always be a special connection between them; be it if they separated or not.

Dream and George had grown up together; they’d seen each other at both their best and worst.

Dream still thanked fate every day that he’d been there, that day, on that server. He was still grateful that he’d found the courage to talk to that random boy, and keep in contact after.

George could have slipped through his fingers so easily; Dream tried not to think about that too much.

The memories he had with George were very dear to Dream’s heart, and he hoped that even after a lot of years, he’d be able to remember them as well as he could now.

But aside from memories together with George, he also had a lot associated with him.

Dream trusted Sapnap more than he trusted himself. He’d been friends with the other for almost an entire decade; he’d known him much longer than George or Bad.

Sapnap had been around for events of Dream’s life many people didn’t know about. They were childhood best friends; and Sapnap knew Dream on a level that no other did, not even George.

That was exactly the reason why Dream had trusted Sapnap with his biggest secret back then; and he was so glad that he had.

That memory was still very vivid in his mind; he knew exactly where he’d been, what he’d worn, hell, even what date that day had been.

The day Dream had confessed to Sapnap that he wasn’t straight.

It was interesting how many ridiculous details he could still remember, and how some more important things had been lost in the moment.

That feeling he’d felt back then, it still gave him goosebumps thinking about it. Dream was not an irrational person; that night, he had been.

The fear he’d felt was something Dream would never be able to forget, and he’d probably never feel it again.

It had felt like a life and death situation; when in reality, it had been an acceptance or rejection scenario.

Yet, somehow, Dream believed that the real version was much more terrifying.

It had been a night just like this one, a few years back.

_Dream opened the door to his room and quickly entered, shutting it quietly behind him._

_It was very late already; his mother had yelled at him for coming home that late, all of his siblings were already about to go to sleep. She’d been so worried, and Dream felt horrible about it._

_Putting his things neatly on the floor, he went to the bathroom, sighing as he looked into the mirror and saw his reflection staring right back at him._

_He looked dead._

_Shaking his head lightly, he turned away, removing his clothes to take a shower and brush his teeth._

_His room felt emptier than usual; Dream was freezing._

_He quickly turned off the lights and got into bed, wrapping himself tightly in his covers._

_He could hear cars passing by outside, and he could hear some rustling, probably his siblings in the rooms nearby._

_Dream was so hyper-aware of every little sound; the mere thought of sleep was impossible._

_That day had probably been the worst he’d had in all his life. Dream wanted to forget and fall asleep more than anything._

_But he couldn’t; he lied awake, his thoughts making his head hurt._

_And more importantly, the small throbbing of his heart jolted him awake whenever he as much as tried to close his eyes._

_Dream felt so alone._

_Why? Why had that happened? What had he done wrong, was there anything he could have done to save what they had?_

_Dream wanted to open his window and jump out, run to his place, and beg him on his knees to explain everything to him, to give him a better answer than the one he’d received earlier._

_Was he really this pathetic? This childish?_

_He’d told him all that he could, Dream knew that, but it somehow wasn’t enough. There were a million other things he wanted to know, wanted to ask about, there were not enough hours in the day for that._

_He hadn’t expected it to hurt this much. Why was it not going away?_

_Dream swallowed thickly, but it was no use._

_In the quiet of his room, he let the tears fall. There was no one around to witness, no one around to judge and point fingers._

_It was just Dream, his tears and the heaviness in his aching heart._

_And the worst part? There was no one who could have reached out to him, anyway. No one knew of this, Dream had kept this a secret so well, the only one who knew was not there, was busy, she wouldn’t pick up the phone, he didn’t want her to._

_Dream was damned to suffer alone; he hoped the other was not._

_The night went on, and Dream stayed awake. He didn’t know how long he’d cried, all he knew was that his whole face was puffy and stiff, and everything hurt, it felt sore._

_It felt like torture; wanting to fall asleep so badly because his entire body was aching, but being unable to, forced to feel every little thing._

_His mind was so tired; Dream was sick of feeling this way._

_There was nothing to be done, deep down he’d known that it would end that way. They weren’t living in a fantasy world, not everything had a happy ending._

_But Dream had wanted one so badly, he was willing to fight to his death._

_It was no use, it was over._

_Would they even see each other again, ever?_

_Dream doubted it. It hurt to know the truth._

_And a few hours in, he snapped._

_All rationality had left his mind as he grabbed his phone, dialling the number of the only person he thought might understand, might not stab him in his back._

_“Dream, what the hell? It’s like, way past midnight.”, Sapnap’s tired voice answered._

_Dream opened his mouth to reply, what came out instead was a choked sob._

_So, he did still have tears left to cry, after all._

_Suddenly, Sapnap sounded wide awake. “Dream? Are you okay?”_

_And truly, Dream tried his hardest to answer, but all he could do was try and calm his harsh breathing._

_Sapnap fell silent, and he just listened. He gave Dream his time, and Dream felt the smallest part of him calm down._

_It took him a while to stop the sobbing; but he managed. The peace didn’t last long, however, since it was immediately replaced by crippling dread._

_He had exposed himself. He’d showed his most vulnerable side to his best friend, and Dream felt like throwing up._

_He had to tell him the truth, Sapnap would know if he lied to him. Dream had called him on impulse, so now he had to deal with the consequences._

_“I’m sorry.”, he managed, voice barely audible._

_“Don’t apologize, Dream, it’s okay.”, Sapnap replied with the softest voice Dream had ever heard him use._

_“Thank you.”, Dream managed, inhaling shakily and staring up at his ceiling, trying to figure out what in the hell he was going to do._

_“Where are you right now?”, Sapnap asked, tone dripping with worry._

_“I’m home.”, Dream replied, intensely aware of his own heart hammering against his chest._

_Sapnap hummed softly. “Good. Is anyone home?”_

_Dream shook his head, not even blinking. “Yes.”_

_Sapnap hesitated a little. “Do you think that you can, uhm, maybe get your mom? Or something?”_

_“No, I don’t want them to know.”, Dream replied, gripping his bedsheets unconsciously._

_“Okay, uhm. I’m sorry, I’m so bad at this,” Sapnap said with an awkward laugh void of any joyful emotion, “Dream, do you want to, uhm, talk about it?”_

_Dream weighed the options; he might get this off his chest, finally be able to breathe a little. Or, he might lose a friend tonight. He couldn’t afford to lose someone else._

_“I don’t know.”, he answered earnestly, distantly aware of how his hands were shaking._

_Sapnap’s tone somehow got even more gentle. “And why’s that? Is it something very personal?”_

_Dream nodded again, even when the other was not able to see him. “It is.”_

_“You can trust me, you know?”, the younger said, sitting up in his own bed. “I’ve known you for years, Dream, there’s no way I’d judge you.”_

_“I’m scared,” Dream answered, feeling his eyes tear up again. “I’m so scared you’ll hate me.”_

_Sapnap sucked in his breath quietly. “Dream, what are you talking about? I’d never hate you.”_

_Dream felt his hands shake a little more. “You don’t know that; you don’t know what happened.”_

_Sapnap stayed silent before speaking up in a more collected manner. “Dream, listen here; I don’t know about you, but I trust you. I really do. I know that whatever this is, it’s nothing bad, because I know you, and I know you’re a good person. You don’t have to be scared to talk to me; I’ll stay on this call the entire night with you if that’s what you need.”_

_“How are you so sure?”, Dream asked, voice barely above a whisper._

_“Because you’re you. You’ve been my friend for so long, you were around to witness me hit puberty, man. I know you, so I am sure that whatever this is, it won’t change my view of you.”_

_Something in Sapnap’s tone sounded so confident, so strong that Dream knew he was saying the truth. He was being honest, and Dream found himself feeling a little braver._

_“Can you promise me something?”, he asked, biting his lip anxiously._

_“Yes.”, Sapnap replied right away, patiently waiting for Dream to come around._

_“Promise me you won’t hate me?”_

_“I promise.”_

_Dream took a deep breath, and he found the he had no idea what to say. He’d never even thought about telling anyone, how did one even start a conversation like this? Was there something specific he had to say, what would be the calmest way to drop the information, so Sapnap wouldn’t be scared off? Dream felt the anxiety in his stomach grow with each passing second, trying to ignore all the irrational thoughts clouding his mind._

_The kind of fear he felt was unlike anything he’d ever felt before; it felt like this was a huge turning point in his life._

_So, he just blurted out the naked truth._

_“My boyfriend broke up with me.”_

_Was Sapnap going to hate him now? Would he be disgusted, call him names like some people he knew, would he feel too uncomfortable to continue their friendship?_

_Dream had guarded that little secret of his so well; only his sister had known that Dream had a boyfriend. She’d been so supportive, by his side through it all, Dream would not have had the courage to accept the other boy asking him out if it hadn’t been for her. But she didn’t live with him anymore, she was in university, had a whole life of her own. Dream didn’t want to intrude._

_God, he’d loved his boyfriend so much. For the first time, he’d felt like he was finally himself, like he didn’t have to hide._

_Those thoughts constantly occupying his mind, he was so tired of them._

_He’d always known he wasn’t exactly like everyone else. When others would only look at certain people, he’d look at everyone. He never cared if someone was a girl or a boy, he just cared about them._

_But that was not normal. At least that’s what everyone made him feel._

_Dream loved to observe others; he loved to pick up on the smallest of details, build a picture of someone’s character based on the little actions they did. Words were misleading; actions told the truth. He’d often see people adored by everyone for their kindness, and quietly look away whenever he saw the huge cracks in their act. He was not one to expose them; not that anyone would listen, anyway._

_Dream spent most of his time alone when he was a kid. Contrary to what many believed, he used to be extremely shy before he slowly started to come out of his shell._

_Especially in primary school, Dream was known as a loner. The other kids never really talked to him, he spent most of his time somewhere to the side, thinking up stories in his head and imagining bringing them to paper one day._

_But on the rare occasions where he did talk to others, he’d notice the differences. He’d listen in on their conversations, most of the time they were about interests or hobbies, maybe some complaints. But some days, the kids would talk about crushes._

_Dream had never had a crush before. He didn’t really know anyone, anyway, so there was no use. The only parts he saw of others were their shallow appearance, and that alone was not enough to make Dream feel like they were any more special than literally every other person on the school property._

_But sometimes he’d be interested; sometimes someone would catch his attention._

_And that was precisely the problem; the people who caught his attention sometimes scared him._

_Not their actions, no, it was who they were._

_Because sometimes, Dream would not just look at girls. He’d look at boys, too._

_And that was not normal. How could it be? No one else around him seemed to have the same issue._

_Seeing a girl and feeling like he wanted to get to know her, it made Dream feel giddy. He often wondered if that girl would be the one, the one to make him fall in love with her. Those daydreams never lasted longer than a day; he pretty early on realized that in one way or another, something felt off about them. It didn’t change the light-heartedness in his mood, though, that stayed for days._

_Mostly because looking at a girl like that, it made Dream feel safe. Normal. Like there was nothing wrong with him._

_Noticing a boy, and feeling that little blossoming feeling of hope and admiration in his chest, made Dream feel scared._

_It felt weird, he’d immediately look away and try to distract himself. His heartbeat never failed to pick up pace, and he’d walk away with a red face._

_He was terrified that one day, a boy might look back. Might see Dream, and know. Dream didn’t know what he’d do if he was caught._

_Those thoughts sometimes seemed to physically hurt; Dream didn’t know where they came from. He tried to shut them out, heart racing in his chest. He was normal, he was like the other kids, so why were none of them going through the same thing?_

_He’d spend a day panicking, and the next he’d see a girl, and he’d so desperately want to fall in love with her._

_Just so he could feel like he was normal._

_He lived in a little rural area in Florida; there wasn’t much diversity. All Dream saw was what he already knew, and this? He’d never seen it anywhere._

_Was this something he could fix? Maybe, somehow, he’d heard something one day and this is why he was feeling like this, thinking this? Maybe it wasn’t his fault, maybe this was some sort of phase. Dream hoped that so badly._

_One of the main reasons why he never talked to anyone was because he felt like they’d see right through him; they’d know._

_Dream saw guys have girlfriends, and he saw girls have boyfriends. That was normal, that was what he should be aiming for._

_But no matter how desperately he wanted to be like the other kids; he feared to be in a relationship like that. What if she’d find out?_

_And worst of all; what would his parents think? Would they be disappointed?_

_Dream felt like that was something he shouldn’t be worrying about; he wanted it all to stop. He wanted to wake up one day, and not have to deal with that issue, ever again._

_But life was not fair, so he kept seeing them equally, he kept feeling a certain way towards boys, no matter how much he screamed at himself not to._

_It was no use; he was broken._

_Dream hoped to be normal, someday._

_And how could a kid have known that something like this wasn’t going to just go away? How could a kid have possibly understood what those feelings meant?_

_Dream never saw anyone like himself around, he never saw anyone like him on TV, in books, anywhere. He was alone; he needed fixing._

_Middle school was when it all went to hell._

_For the first time, Dream learned a new piece of information. It felt like he understood a little more. Somehow, he wished to have stayed oblivious._

_Gay._

_Is that what he was? Dream only knew a little; but he’d see people get called that. He’d see others walk up to a boy, and call him ‘gay’. Dream had never heard anyone spit a word with as much venom before._

_It was a slur, someone who was gay was bad._

_Was Dream gay?_

_The feeling he associated with the word ‘gay’ was confused fear. On one hand, he’d learned what the word meant by now, and he knew that it targeted him, even when no one had ever said it to his face. On the other hand, Dream was confused._

_He liked girls. He couldn’t be gay._

_But why did he look at guys, sometimes?_

_As much as Dream had wanted clarity, and as much he finally got some context, it left him with much more confusion than before._

_Because seemingly, he was even more broken than he thought. He was not normal, but he was also not gay. Neither good nor evil._

_What the fuck was he, then? Some sort of anomaly?_

_At that point, Dream would have much rather preferred being the bad guy, if only it meant he’d finally feel like he fit somewhere._

_Dream changed. Everyone around him noticed. He hoped that with this, he’d finally get rid of his flaws._

_He started asserting himself, made a name for himself._

_Gone was the shy, dreamy kid. In his place, came a young boy who was the perfect example of a delinquent._

_Dream meddled in business he shouldn’t have, he hung out with people who weren’t good for him._

_He earned a reputation; he was the cocky, outspoken kid that no one dared to approach, since no one knew what exactly he was capable of._

_It was all an act._

_Dream would come home, exhausted. He’d not talk to his family; it felt like his voice might break if he did._

_Carrying the reputation of a troublemaker was hard, especially since Dream was faking it._

_He learned early on that faking and latching onto things that seemed normal too quickly was a great coping mechanism. It made him feel like he was finally in control._

_No one would know, no one would ever find out the truth._

_Dream would put on a mask, and he’d hide this secret, he’d be normal, he’d be the person he wanted to be._

_The last thing he wanted was to be alone and scared again. He couldn’t be himself; not when there was so much to fix, still._

_They respected him; Dream felt like he was at the top of the world. No one as much as dared to turn his way, if they wanted to stay out of trouble._

_Dream got his first girlfriend; she was the prettiest and most popular girl at school._

_Deep down, he hated her._

_And he hated himself for that._

_It wasn’t like there was anything genuine, he didn’t know her true intentions, but he damn well knew his._

_He was popular, he was respected, he had a girlfriend. He was normal._

_That was all he needed, and he pushed down the guilt so far back in his heart that he forgot to feel it, sometimes._

_He needed her to maintain his image; he was dating a girl; he was not gay._

_He was not weak._

_And at the end of the day, nothing mattered. Dream made a name for himself, and he stopped flinching whenever he’d hear people get called gay._

_He stopped to cry himself to sleep after he’d witness someone be cornered and beaten, the only words leaving the attackers’ mouths being ‘fucking faggot’._

_If he turned a blind eye to it, it would disappear._

_But the fear in his heart never did._

_It only took the first year of high school for Dream to realize that he’d never be able to keep going like that._

_The turmoil of emotions in his heart, and his desperate attempt at trying to make them go away, took a bad toll on his mental health._

_His reputation stayed; people respected him. No one questioned why he turned quieter all of a sudden; they were too scared to ask._

_Dream stopped rebelling, but he was still a presence. People knew better than to challenge him._

_His fake persona was effective; it shielded him from others, allowed for vulnerability to stay hidden between layers of pretence._

_He was untouchable; nothing could ever hurt him._

_Deep down, Dream was falling apart. Was he loosing himself? Or was this what he’d been desperately wishing for years, turning normal, destroying his flaws?_

_He was at a crossroad; one road was new perspectives and things he’d learned; the other was his past._

_He didn’t know which one to trust._

_Dream had learned all about this; there were all kinds of people out there. He saw new views on this, he saw men dating men proudly, women kissing women without feeling like they were monsters._

_Dream didn’t know what all of that meant; was he part of it, or was he different?_

_Would it be okay for him to let those feelings out, to try and see what happened?_

_But how could he; hundreds of people were watching. They were judging, waiting, Dream was terrified._

_They’d hate him if they knew. They’d beat him down until he returned to the sheltered kid he used to be._

_Dream refused to feel helpless ever again._

_But he wished to understand himself so desperately; he wanted to know if maybe, he wasn’t bad, after all. Maybe it was his experience that was._

_So, he let himself look. He’d no longer flinch and turn around immediately; he allowed for it to happen._

_He felt lighter than he had in years._

_What was he, after all? Not gay, not straight. He was just Dream._

_He hoped that would be enough._

_When he first met his boyfriend, he knew that the other was different. Something about the way he held himself made Dream unable to look away; he was mesmerized._

_It felt different. This was no gentle admiration; it was a burning passion._

_Dream realized he was falling for the guy when they were sitting on his front porch, talking about the most embarrassing of childhood stories._

_Dream felt featherlight; he was almost floating._

_The other’s presence was so calming; Dream felt like he could drop his act._

_And he did; the other never commented on it. Dream would forever be thankful about that._

_For the first time, he felt normal. Their situation was so far from anything he’d considered normal for years; but in some ways, it felt liberating._

_Falling in love with him was easy._

_The hot Florida sun, the cold sea water, hour long conversations under the stars and quiet moments in each other’s presence lead to the most genuine, most natural and normal thing Dream had ever experienced._

_He felt brave, for once in his life; he told someone._

_His sister has always been the one person he looked up to the most, and he knew that if anyone, she was the one to go to._

_And he was right; she supported him like no one else. Dream believed that without her, he’d still live in his own shadow._

_He didn’t remember how he told her; all he could remember was the smell of her flower-scented shampoo as she’d hugged him tightly._

_So, he had said yes. He had agreed to start dating his boyfriend, and that marked one of the most influential days of his life._

_They continued on as usual; but now, Dream could reach out without his mind screaming at him to back off._

_Now, Dream could allow for that part of himself he’d hidden for years to come out and slowly start the journey to healing._

_The road was long and bumpy; but his boyfriend held his hand through it all._

_They didn’t tell anyone; Dream thought it was better that way._

_They couldn’t afford the strain that would take on their relationship, so they resorted to secretive glances, shy smiles and distant closeness._

_Dream was in love with him; his boyfriend was his first love._

_Everything he’d imagined as a kid was overshone; this was nothing like he’d thought it to be._

_Dream felt more like himself than he ever had; and some days, he’d dream about how one day, they’d come out to their friends, to the world._

_A few months in, he realized that they’d never get to that._

_Dream loved him, and vice versa. But sometimes, love was not enough._

_Having to constantly hide your true feelings, Dream knew better than anyone how toxic and destructive that could be._

_After all, they were just a pair of stupid kids; they didn’t know how to deal with something as intense as that._

_Dream believed that his boyfriend taught him more about life than anyone ever did, and thus he left an impact on his life, one Dream would never take for granted._

_They loved each other; but they were immature. They didn’t know how to deal with the gravity of their relationship, they didn’t know how to figure things out without losing themselves along the way._

_So, before they could part in hate, they parted in love._

_In the end, his boyfriend broke up with him. Dream knew why, he agreed with the other, but rationality never meant it was going to hurt less._

_Dream’s heart was bleeding, and somehow, it felt like years’ worth of suppression crashed on his head._

_He was sick and tired of the pain; after having felt what it was like to live as himself, he felt like he was going to choke to death if he ever returned to pretending again._

_Dream couldn’t keep the secret anymore; it was time to finally be himself._

_Sapnap took a deep breath. “I’m sorry to hear that, Dream.”_

_Dream held his breath as he waited for more to come. But Sapnap never said anything else._

_“Wait, what?”, he stuttered, tone laced with confusion._

_“What do you mean ‘what’? I’m sorry, Dream, I just don’t really know how to react to a break-up, I’ve never had anyone tell me about theirs. I don’t mean to come off as cold, I’m just a little lost.”, Sapnap replied, sounding worried._

_Dream felt like he was wide awake. “No, hold on. That’s all you have to say?”_

_Sapnap seemed a little hesitant. “Yeah? Look, man, I don’t know the context, so I can’t really comfort you much. I guess I hope you’ll get better? Did you guys part on good terms, or not?”_

_Dream was in disbelief. “You…you don’t think there’s something wrong with this?”_

_Sapnap seemed confused. “No? I mean, you’ve not told me anything so maybe he was an asshole, in that case; fuck him, you can do better than that.”_

_Dream didn’t really know if he was hearing things clearly. “I-, no! He’s not an asshole! No, wait, what the fuck.”_

_“No? Well, that’s good, I suppose. Is that why you’re so sad? Do you still love him?”, Sapnap asked carefully._

_Dream stood up from his bed and walked to his window, staring outside, forehead pressed against the cold glass. He was trying his best to calm his heart._

_“That’s not even the point! Sapnap, did you hear me correctly? I said my boyfriend broke up with me!”_

_Sapnap was too tired to be this confused. “Yeah, I got that part. What’s up with you?”_

_Dream was, too. “Boyfriend, Sapnap. Boy-friend!”_

_“Look, man, I don’t know what you’re trying to pull here; are you flexing or something? You know how unlucky I am with dating; you don’t have to rub it in that you got game.”_

_Dream gripped his shirt tightly. “Don’t you think I’m weird now?”_

_Sapnap scoffed. “What? Why would I?”_

_“I dated a boy.”_

_“So? I’ve never dated anyone.”_

_Dream felt like this was too good to be true. “Sapnap, I dated a boy! I’m a boy!”_

_Sapnap seemed to finally be getting where he was going with this. “Dream, do you think I’m homophobic?”_

_Dream was too stunned to answer._

_Sapnap continued. “If so, I must inform you that I am absolutely not. I don’t know what you think me to be, but I’ll say this; I don’t care about other people’s preferences, least of all yours. Just because you’re a boy dating a boy, doesn’t mean you’re weird. You’re just Dream, the good old you. I am guessing that this was what you were worried about, so Dream; I really don’t give a shit. I feel bad for you because someone broke up with you, and I hope you’ll be okay, but that’s as far as my care goes, so.”_

_Dream felt the small sensation of safety and happiness blossom in his chest, calming down his racing heart a little bit. He stayed silent for a while, just trying to process, before it all came crushing down on him._

_Dream didn’t even realize he’d started to have the smallest of smiles. “That means more than you think, Sapnap.”_

_“Well, it’s the truth. Anyway, what are you going to do with this?”_

_Sapnap moved over that so casually; he acted like it wasn’t a big deal. Dream was starting to realize that maybe, it really wasn’t._

_He paused for a while. “I guess I’ll distract myself, maybe get a new hobby. I don’t want to see him for a while.”_

_Sapnap hummed. “How about we play Minecraft tomorrow? I’m sure you’ll forget him when I threaten to kill you with my mad skill.”_

_Dream chuckled. “I’m sure of that. And yeah, let’s play tomorrow. I think I’ll go to sleep now.”_

_Sapnap yawned as if on cue. “Me, too. Sleep well, dude, we can talk more about this tomorrow, if you feel like it.”_

_Dream tilted his head a little, paying special focus to a certain star in the sky. “We’ll see. I feel like I shouldn’t be talking about him for a few days, at least.”_

_“Whatever feels right. I’ll be there to listen, yeah? I may be a noob at dating, but I am excellent in Dream-science, so I will be able to do the job of distracting you perfectly.”, Sapnap’s tone was full of care._

_Dream’s heart melted a little. “Thank you, Pandas. For everything.”_

_“Sure thing. Now go to bed, I don’t want you being late to our little online meet-up tomorrow. Sleep well, Dream, I love you.”_

_Dream closed his eyes and smiled. “I love you, too. Till tomorrow.”_

_Needless to say, falling asleep came easier than expected._

Sapnap probably didn’t know how much that conversation had actually changed Dream’s life back then.

He’d pulled himself together; taken his time to heal, and started walking with his head high.

Dream had spent many nights thinking; he wanted to decide what to do with himself. He knew he couldn’t keep going like he had before, something had to change.

He had to truly understand what it meant to be himself.

The journey was made easier by his sister and Sapnap; they knew what he had dreaded and tried to hide for years. He felt like at this point, he could tell them anything. They loved him for who he was, even when Dream still didn’t fully know who that person was.

But there was someone else who helped him immensely; George.

Dream found that he never had a moment where he felt like it was perfect to tell George. Somehow, it just never happened.

To some, coming out might not have been a big deal, but to Dream it was. No matter how much he worked on himself, there was always that little voice in the back of his mind, whispering words of fear into his ear, and Dream would back off.

He never could proudly announce his sexuality. Even when, toward the end of high school, he finally figured out that he was bisexual, he never found the courage to update his sister or Sapnap on his findings. They knew some details, but they didn’t know the whole story, Dream preferred it that way.

Sexuality was something insanely personal to him; he struggled for a long time to even just admit it to himself. So how could he go out and tell others?

He kept his sexuality ambiguous; aside from that one time he’d panicked and told George that he was straight.

Dream didn’t know what had gone through his mind, but he was back in middle school again, for just a moment, so he put his defences up and lied.

He never got to tell George the truth, it would have been weird to bring it up randomly.

The thing was; Dream wanted George to know.

The other had been with him through the worst of his times, he had met George when he’d just started high school. The older boy never knew about any of Dream’s struggles with sexuality; that was the one thing Dream just couldn’t bring himself to share.

Though, he was there for it all, even when he was unaware. George would comfort Dream after some of his nightmares; he never asked what they were about. George would let Dream vent about all of his pent-up feelings, yet he never asked why Dream was feeling this strongly about certain things.

George listened, and he barely ever asked questions. Dream had never felt as safe as he did with George.

George had seen it all; even when he never got to hear about the driving force behind it. He didn’t need to; all he seemed to care about was being there for Dream.

As the years passed by, Dream realized that he wanted George to know. Not because he felt like he was obligated to share, or because it was weird for him not to know. Dream was ready to tell George because he genuinely wanted to; there was no real reason behind it. Dream wanted George to be the first person he came out to openly, and proudly.

His sister had found out because he felt like he would have exploded if he hadn’t shared his secret with anyone. Sapnap had found out because Dream had been overly emotional and had let his guard down, feeling like sharing was the only way to get rid of the pain in his chest.

And George? George would find out because Dream wanted him to, because he felt comfortable and safe enough to make the choice himself.

Dream would still have nightmares, sometimes he’d find himself feeling things he hadn’t in years, and that was okay. The journey to healing was long and arduous; Dream was aware. He knew that pretending for years would leave scars, and things like internalized homophobia wouldn’t just magically go away.

It was insidious; Dream knew himself, and he knew that there was nothing wrong with not being straight. Yet, sometimes, he’d still get a racing heart whenever thought about a boy, and it wasn’t the good kind. It was a remnant of his past fears.

The wounds were still healing; it hadn’t been long since Dream had started getting better. Maybe, a few years down the line, he’d get to feel like there wasn’t a small weight on his heart whenever he thought certain thoughts. Maybe one day, he’d be able to loudly yell how proud he was to be himself, through and through.

Dream couldn’t wait for that day.

For now, though, he wanted to continue his journey of healing, and accept that he won’t just wake up one day, perfectly fine. Step by step, he’d get to his goal, and Dream knew he’d be able to reach it.

After all, he had his friends. He was safe.

And, he had George; the person he’d tell out of his own free will, no other emotionally charged intent behind it.

It may have not been huge to most people; but to Dream, it meant a step in the right direction.

Laying there, in the dark, Dream smiled to himself.

He was proud to be who he was.

There was a lot he still had to work on, but at the end of the day, he’d gotten so far, he needed some credit for that.

Dream fell asleep quickly after that, mind swimming in memories, both good and bad.

He was going to be okay; he was going to be openly proud.

Dream had never felt as sure of anything in his life before.

­___

“Hear me out on this one; no.”, George said, voice firm.

Sapnap feigned offence. “But it would be so much fun!”

Dream could practically hear George roll his eyes. “For you, maybe. For me? Absolutely not.”

Sapnap was definitely pouting, and Dream was wondering how they’d gotten to the point where Sapnap was practically begging George to buy a strawberry dress and wear it on stream.

“Gogy, c’mon! We both know you’d look amazing in it.”, Sapnap tried again, only to receive a groan in return.

“Sapnap, I won’t wear a fucking dress on stream! You’re being ridiculous.”

“I am being very reasonable; think about the views you’d get.”

George scoffed. “Blood money, all of it.”

Sapnap sighed exaggeratedly. “You’re dumb. Anyway, Dream?”

The latter piped up. “Yeah?”

Sapnap sounded mischievous. “Will you wear the strawberry dress?”

Dream thought about it. “I don’t stream with a face-cam, though.”

Sapnap seemed to consider this. “True. But what if you took a picture?”

Dream looked down at his hands. “I mean-“

George sucked in his breath. “Dream, are you being serious?”

“Yeah? I mean, why not. I bet it’s fun to wear a dress, all breezy.”

George hummed. “I see your point. What I mean is; are you actually allowing Sapnap to convince you to do something as, well, intense as this for clout? Don’t feed into his weird fetishes!”

Sapnap sounded offended. “Hey, I was just trying to bring in numbers! And you’re just envious, George, you wish you’d look as good as Dream in a strawberry dress!”

George’s voice went up a pitch. “Envious?! How do you even know what he looks like in a dress, huh?”

Sapnap was definitely teasing. “What if I do, huh? You don’t know what me and Dream are up to, Gogy. Are you jealooooous?”

George sounded pissed off. “Shut up!”

“You know,” Dream started, smiling softly, “while it may break Twitter to see me in a strawberry dress, I don’t think I’m that comfortable with revealing myself.”

Both Sapnap and George took a second to collect themselves.

Sapnap sighed. “All I wanted was one of you in a strawberry dress; all I got was pain.”

George laughed mockingly. “Go buy your own if you’re so into it.”

“However,” Dream started again, and his friends stopped talking, “I am not opposed to wearing it just for fun.”

There was a silence. Then Sapnap screamed.

“Yes, do it! Do it! Send me a picture!”

“Sapnap, you scare me sometimes.”, George uttered.

Sapnap scoffed. “It’s perfectly normal to want to see your best friend in a strawberry dress, George. You’re the one who scares me for not agreeing.”

And they started bickering again.

Dream loved to just listen; their dynamic never failed to make him chuckle. Even when they were at each other’s throats more often than not, Dream loved how protective and caring they actually were with each other, those idiots probably didn’t even notice. Dream was glad he’d introduced George to Sapnap.

“George, you have to admit; guys in dresses are just amazing.”, Sapnap said as a matter of fact.

George hummed. “Whilst I agree, I must say that that does not apply to close friends.”

“That ESPECIALLY applies to close friends, George.”, Sapnap answered.

“I’d rather not thirst over my friends and their choice in fashion.”, George said calmly.

Sapnap sounded defeated. “I get it, George. You’re just old, of course this is a little much for your century old brain. I am sorry, I should have been more considerate.”

George groaned. “Shut up, oh my God. I’m not old, you’re just a child.”

“Am not!”, Sapnap shot back.

“You guys are both dumb; there, I fixed it.”, Dream stated before returning his attention back to finishing writing down the idea they had come up with for the next video.

Neither Sapnap nor George paid him any mind and they continued insulting each other.

Dream was really happy with their new idea; he couldn’t wait to film the video. He knew that it would probably be a little challenging, but he was competitive, so he loved to chase the high.

“Dream? I actually have to go, I have a stream coming up in a few minutes and I need to prepare some things.”, George said after a while.

“Why just Dream? You are so rude, Gogy, so damn rude.”, Sapnap pouted.

Dream hummed. “Sure, good luck. I might join a little later, once I’m done with this.”

“Got it, bye!”, he said before disconnecting.

Now, it was only Dream and Sapnap.

For a while, the latter let him finish typing, before speaking up.

“Did I make you uncomfortable?”, he asked.

Dream furrowed his brows. “What? No.”

Sapnap seemed hesitant. “It’s just, you know, the whole deal with the dress, I’m sorry if I overstepped.”

“You didn’t, don’t worry. Things like those don’t really bother me, anyway.”

Sapnap was relieved. “I’m glad. Just tell me if I get too much?”

Dream chuckled. “You’re always too much.”

“You know what I mean!”

“I do,” Dream smiled, saving and closing the file, “The idea isn’t even that bad. Dresses are pretty neat.”

Sapnap snorted. “I get the feeling you’re not talking about yourself.”

“Why’s that?”, Dream replied slyly.

“We both know you’d love to see George in a dress.”

Dream acted offended. “Is that why you suggested it?”

Sapnap laughed. “No, but halfway in I realized the potential and I kept going.”

“You’re evil.”

“No, I’m just a genius. You’d owe me for life if I actually had gotten him to wear it.”, Sapnap stated.

“Some things cannot be denied. Your sentiment was appreciated, even though it’s stupid of you to think George would have agreed, especially since it was you asking!”, Dream said, chuckling when he heard Sapnap’s groan.

“So what? You think he’d have done it if you asked?”

Dream thought about it. “Nah, no chance. I guess George in a dress will forever be a thing of impossibility.”

Sapnap feigned heartbreak. “Oh, what a cruel world we live in.”

Dream smirked. “Karl, on the other hand-“

“Yes, we’re stopping here. There was actually something I wanted to ask you.”, Sapnap said quickly.

Dream let him off the hook. “What is it?”

Sapnap’s voice was back to gentle. “How have you been dealing with, you know?”

Dream sighed. “I’ve been dealing with it, I guess. No, really, it’s fine. I don’t think much has changed.”

“But you seem a little sadder recently; I am a bit worried, you know?”

Dream hummed. “I get it. But don’t worry, I’ve just not been coping well, is all.”

“You still think that it’s best not to tell him?”, Sapnap asked carefully.

Dream thought about it. “I don’t know anymore. I do want to tell him, but I don’t know how and when. I feel like it would be out of the blue, I don’t want to overrun him.”

Sapnap seemed to think his answer through. “I guess I get what you’re saying. You know, you may be the all high and mighty Dream, looking out for George’s supposed best interest, but you shouldn’t forget about yourself. How you feel is just as important as how George feels.”

Dream looked down at his feet. “I know that, Sapnap. I just…it’s complicated. You know that this is much more than just telling George that I’m in love with him.”

“I do,” Sapnap said gently, “I do know that, but my duty as a friend is to tell you all sides. And from what I can see right now, you’re not feeling well. You need to put yourself first, sometimes. I’m sure George will be fine; he doesn’t even know what’s going on.”

Dream exhaled deeply. “I know all of that, but George has been dealing with stuff himself, recently, I won’t come in and overwhelm him when he’s clearly not in his best shape.”

Sapnap sighed. “Fair enough. Just promise me you won’t play the part of a selfless fool? Both of you guys’ feelings are important; that means George is not the only one who should be considered.”

Dream chuckled. “Since when are you this wise, huh? All grown up now?”

Sapnap snorted. “What can I say; I’m one hell of a good boy.”

Dream’s face twisted with disgust. “Don’t ever say that again.”

Sapnap gasped. “What?! What’s wrong with that phrasing?”

“Forget it.”

“I won’t.”

“Ok.”

“Ok.”

Dream ran his hand over his phase. “This was your cue to hang up.”

Sapnap mocked his words. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t receive the script.”

“Just leave the call already.”

Sapnap scoffed. “Why don’t you hang up first?”

Dream sighed. “You know what, I will.”

“Wait-“

And he ended the call.

Dream yawned and stood up from his chair, walking over to his bed and laying down. It was only late afternoon; but he hadn’t gotten much sleep the previous night. His life was a little stressful at the moment, he had a lot of things on his plate, not to mention the way he was handling his mental health.

Dream was at a point in life where he was fine with his sexuality, at least to himself. He was comfortable, so much so that he even went on dates with guys openly.

But at the end of the day, no matter what he did; George was always on his mind.

George had been special from the moment they had met.

For one, Dream had tried to contact him first. But the other had never replied. Dream had ended up getting what he wanted, anyway, but something about not receiving a reply had struck some sort of nerve. Once they started working together, though, Dream realized that George wasn’t the prick he had thought him to be. He was actually very kind. Their friendship came naturally, after that. Dream felt differently about George than anyone else from the moment they had first talked.

Their friendship had a very calm feeling to it; like the sea with the smallest of waves, a soft sunset in the background, no noises but the wind and water.

Dream had struggled to trust others for a long time; George made him feel like he could say anything that came to his mind.

Even when he blocked himself sometimes, told himself to keep quiet, Dream always knew that he could trust George, and that George would understand.

It had been easy to realize how deeply in love he was with his best friend.

Dream didn’t remember when exactly it started, or how he found out, it just felt like it had been around for ages, it felt like it was the most normal and natural thing in existence.

They talked every day. George knew all of his most embarrassing stories, and Dream knew all of George’s. They had books worth of insiders, years’ worth of memories. They had gotten to a point where they knew each other’s habits inside and out, they could read each other’s moods like no one else could, the smallest of hints were only ever picked up by the both of them. They didn’t need to talk all the time, sometimes they’d be silent on call for minutes on end, but it never bothered either of them. It was a comfort.

Even though Dream couldn’t recall everything, he did know that his love for George was formed gradually.

Which was quite the opposite of how he fell in love with his boyfriend; that one had been quick, fast-paced and passionate. Dream had jumped in head first, not even thinking much about any potential consequences.

His love for George, on the other end? It took a little longer, at least in terms of realization. It felt a lot calmer, it was less intense, more slow and softly passionate. It made Dream feel a sensation of happiness he never had before.

His love for his boyfriend had been like a storm; his love for George like sunrise.

And because of that, Dream realized that he never had the same doubts about their bond as he had with his boyfriend. Dream trusted George, and he trusted his feelings, for once. There was no chance that they could fall apart the way Dream and his first love were doomed to, Dream didn’t know why he knew, but he did, and he was yet to be proven otherwise.

Dream would turn quieter as he observed George; he’d be a lot more like himself. He didn’t feel the need to look around all the time, he knew no one was watching, he felt safe. George would make him smile the softest of smiles; even his family picked up on it.

Because truly, they complimented each other well, they balanced out one another. Dream was turbulent, he was impulsive sometimes, overwhelming. George was calm, he was easy-going and reluctant. Together, they brought out the best in each other. Sometimes Dream wondered how they really were the perfect cheesy cliché.

Dream’s love for George was a lot stronger, because he had the foundation of a friendship, too. He knew George in and out, and he knew he could be trusted, so when he fell in love, he fell deeper than ever before. That was probably the reason why Dream couldn’t just get over George as easily; his love for the other was a part of him, at this point.

And the mere realization had hit him hard.

Not necessarily the realization of feelings, rather how Dream thought about it.

When Dream first realized he was in love with George, he was scared. After all, they were best friends; Dream had only been an adult for a while, he still felt like a kid. He would worry every night, wondering if George would be mad at him if he knew, if he found out.

And one time, randomly, when he was taking a walk around his hometown, it hit him.

Dream was worried about liking George, and why?

Because George was his best friend.

Not because George was a guy.

Dream still remembered how fast his heart had been beating, and how speechless he’d been. For so long, he’d been looking at people a certain way, worried whenever he found a guy cute. His first thought had always been ‘I can’t, he’s a guy’.

Somehow, George was different. Dream had been so overwhelmed with the realization of loving his friend, he’d completely forgotten the other was a guy.

Dream felt like crying; and he also felt ridiculous. It didn’t mean much, technically, but Dream still thought it was so special.

He hadn’t worried about the things that always ended up ruining everything for him; he had only worried about his best friend.

Because it didn’t matter who George was; Dream would have fallen in love with him all the same.

For the first time, Dream realized that he wasn’t worried about liking a guy.

It felt liberating; being able to feel so carefree and happy about his feelings. Dream got a taste of what it felt like to be at peace with himself; and he decided to chase that high ever since.

George may not know how he had indirectly impacted a big step of Dream’s journey to healing, but that didn’t matter, Dream would tell him one day.

Even when it hurt to yearn his best friend every day, feel the desperate desire to be close to him but not being able to, Dream was still glad he got to experience it. He learned a lot during the years he spent admiring George in silence, from afar. He learned a lot about how to handle his emotions, how to cope.

Dream was glad that he was able to pine after George like a fool, because in the end, it taught him more than it hurt him.

Dream was happy to have fallen in love with George; even when their love would never even begin in the first place.

At some point, that truth had stopped hurting.

Dream tried relationships with other people, he really did. Sometimes, he got close, but in the end, it never worked out. He was not emotionally ready to be with someone else when all he saw when he closed his eyes at night was George’s blinding smile.

Still, he held the hope, deep inside of his heart, that somehow, he’d be able to get over it, and see this as nothing more than him finding his true self with the help of the love for George.

Maybe, it would work someday. Maybe not. All Dream could do was try his best and hope for a day where he’d finally figure everything out.

As liberating and impactful as being in love with George was, Dream couldn’t deny how loving someone unrequitedly for years could take a toll on one’s mental health.

One day, Dream would tell George. He’d tell him everything he’d wanted to say for years.

Dream couldn’t wait for that day.

_____

_It was time to tell someone about it; who could have been a better pick than Sapnap._

_“Hey Dream, what’s up?”, the other answered, something rustling in the background. He was probably in his kitchen._

_Dream took a deep breath. “I have something to tell you.”_

_“Shoot.”, Sapnap said, finally turning his full attention onto his best friend._

_This felt so much easier than the phone call a few years back._

_“I’m in love with George.”_

_Sapnap coughed. “Yeah, I knew that.”_

_Dream frowned. “How could you have known?”_

_“You guys act like a couple enough for me to be highly suspicious.”, came the simple reply._

_Dream shook his head slightly. “That’s it, that’s your reaction?”_

_Sapnap was probably shrugging. “I mean, yeah. I’ve always noticed that there was something about you two, and you’re not exactly subtle.”_

_It was astonishing how chill Sapnap was about literally anything. Dream could have called him, screaming that his leg had been cut off, and all Sapnap would have to say would be ‘Sucks, man.’_

_Dream got worried. “I’m not subtle? Do you think George knows, then? Oh my God, please tell me he doesn’t-“_

_Sapnap interrupted him. “George is as dense as a brick, Dream, I’m sure he has no idea.”_

_Dream felt relieved. He stood up from his bed and walked over to Patches, gently petting her head. “I hope so. I don’t want him to know.”_

_“Why, though?”, Sapnap asked._

_Dream shrugged. “It would be too complicated, I’d rather not.”_

_Sapnap sighed. “Well, it’s your decision. How long have you liked him, anyway?”_

_Dream felt his face heat up a little. “A couple of years.”_

_Sapnap choked on air. “You what now?!”_

_Dream rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “Don’t act like it’s weird.”_

_Sapnap seemed a little woozy. “Dude, it’s not weird, it’s just…surprising. How come you’ve been into him for years and you’ve still not told him?”_

_Patches looked at him and he smiled at her sadly. “Sapnap, he’s straight. And I am not about to ruin whatever we have; I’d rather not risk it.”_

_Sapnap hummed. “But isn’t it eating you up from the inside? You clearly love him a lot, how do you deal with this?”_

_“I don’t,” Dream stated, “I just let it happen.”_

_Sapnap sounded genuinely worried. “Man, you’re clearly not okay. I’m glad you at least told me, how are you even able to bundle these feelings up inside all the time?”_

_Dream bit his lip. “I don’t know. I just…I guess I’m worried about upsetting George, and I also don’t feel like I’m ready to confess.”_

_Sapnap’s tone was sad. “When is anyone ever ready to confess, though?”_

_Dream didn’t know the answer, so he stayed silent._

_“Dream, George is your best friend, he won’t judge you. What you’re doing is unhealthy, unless you somehow get over him there is no way this will turn out well for you if you keep quiet.”, Sapnap said after a while._

_Dream sighed. “I know, I know. I’m trying to get over him.”_

_“I’m guessing it’s not working?”_

_“Would I be complaining to you over the phone if it was?”_

_Sapnap hummed. “Point taken. So, what’s the plan?”_

_Dream thought about it. “I try to fall out of love, and if it doesn’t work, I’ll confess once it feels safe to do so.”_

_“It’s always safe, though. Dream, you and me both know that George is not homophobic.”, Sapnap replied._

_Dream groaned. “I know that. It’s more about how uncomfortable he would get.”_

_Sapnap sighed. “And how uncomfortable is it to keep your feelings to yourself for years, huh?”_

_Dream pouted. “Don’t you try to rationalize with me.”_

_Sapnap scoffed. “If not me, then who? Dream, you’re a smart dude, I know that you know everything I might try to tell you. But I also know how stubborn you are, so all I can do is sit and watch, I guess.”_

_Dream groaned again. “Don’t make this seem so easy, it’s not.”_

_Sapnap chuckled. “It is easy, though. You talk to George, confess, and then you figure out what to do from then. If he as much as tries to be a dick to you, I’ll fly over to his house and spit all over his windows.”_

_“That’s oddly specific.”_

_“I have my reasons,” Sapnap stated as a matter of fact, “I will hang up now, unless you need to rant a little, so you can think about this in peace and hopefully make the right choice.”_

_Dream smiled. “Thank you, Sapnap. I can always count on you.”_

_Sapnap’s smile was audible. “Duh, now leave that YA novel reality and start thinking.”_

_Dream chuckled. “I will, once you stop being so rude.”_

_“NEVER!”, and he hung up._

_Dream stood there, a small smile on his face._

_Well, that went better than expected._

_Dream was going to be fine._

___

Dream patted his pockets, checking to see if he had his phone, wallet and keys. He had all three, so he contently picked up his own shopping bag, ready to head to his car so he could go grocery shopping.

The weather seemed to be nice, the sun was shining through his windows brightly.

It would be a great day.

Dream opened his front door and the entire world stopped spinning.

Blinking a few times, he realized that he was not, in fact, dreaming.

George was right there; in front of his God damn door.

He looked just as shocked as Dream, eyes wide and mouth slightly ajar.

Dream stared at him, refusing to believe that what he was seeing was not simply a hallucination.

He felt his body be completely frozen, and somehow, his brain was not able to catch up.

All he could mutter in disbelief was;

“George?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not me ending the second chapter on the same cliffhanger-
> 
> lol i'm very sorry about that, but i couldn't just leave dream without his own pov when george got 14k worth for himself haha, and the third chapter is the one meant to have both of them act in real life, so unfortunately it had to be done, i apologize
> 
> anyways, i hope you enjoyed this regardless! it was very important to me to kind of dicuss dream's experience with his sexuality, since i did imply a lot of things in the second oneshot. and i also just really wanted to project onto dream a little so-
> 
> p.s dream and sapnap friendship pog
> 
> i hope you guys had merry holidays, stay healthy and stay safe <3 and a happy new year!! see you in 2021 haha


	3. my idiot.

_“Doubt thou the stars are fire; Doubt that the sun doth move; Doubt truth to be a liar; But never doubt I love.” -William Shakespeare_

___

“Hi.”

George’s voice was uncharacteristically quiet; it sounded so soft and unsure, with a slight tremor to it, if Dream hadn’t been clinging onto every sound George made, he might have missed it.

The wind brushed gently through their hair, and as their gazes interlocked, Dream felt like he was set aflame.

He had dreamt about this so many times, he’d lost count. It was like every night before he fell asleep, he’d imagine George’s face in front of his, full of glee, cheeks pink and smile so bright he’d put the sun to shame. Dream always envisioned himself reaching out and touching George’s cheek, thumb gently caressing his pale skin with so much care, there was no way George wouldn’t know how he felt.

He had countless of these little reveries stored in a small but special place in his foolish heart, but Dream had never once thought of one that was like this. He had never realized how his dreams actually coming true could be terrifying, but oh, so relieving.

Looking down, Dream noticed that George’s hands were quivering slightly; his heart begged him to reach out and calm them.

But of course, he didn’t. That would have been weird. Every little fantasy, every little scenario he had so desperately clung to, evaporated as soon as the weight of reality crashed down on Dream’s head, and he accepted that he could never be as brave as he wanted to be.

It was as if the air had been forcefully punched out of his lungs; Dream couldn’t bring himself to say a single thing. No matter how hard he tried, every word he thought of sounded so wrong and out of place, he had no idea what to answer, his mind was still trying to process that George was, in fact, right in front of him.

And he seemed scared. Dream’s system immediately filled with guilt as he realized how self-conscious George looked, and how odd his silence must have been.

George was standing right there; Dream felt like he was about to wake up any second.

“Dream?”, George asked again, words laced with nothing but uncertainty. Dream had never liked and disliked the sound of his name more.

Snapping out of his state of pleasant shock, Dream’s eyes widened as it finally set in.

_George was here. George was right within reach. George had come to see him. Fuck, George was finally outside of the damn screen._

And with that, Dream surged forward and engulfed George in an incredibly tight hug.

His left arm wrapped around the others waist, and his right arm came up to hold the back of George’s head, tangling his hand in the other’s fluffy hair. Dream put his head in the space between George’s neck and shoulder while he drowned out all the nagging about this being a hug that was way too friendly for two people who were just friends as George hugged him back with just as much fierceness, wrapping his arms around his shoulders and standing on his toes to be even closer to the other.

Dream quietly breathed in George’s scent as he tried to savour this moment and save it in his memory for the rest of his life. This was the first time he’d been able to be this close to George, they’d never hugged like that before, not even back in Brighton. Dream felt lightheaded, but he never once loosened his hold on the other, too afraid the moment would shatter and he’d realize that his mind had cruelly thought all of this up, and George was still an entire ocean away from him, a distance they never seemed to be able to truly close.

Dream felt George giggle into the nape of his neck, and he hoped that the older didn’t notice the goosebumps overcoming his entire body. Dream felt like he was drunk when it started to settle in that George’s warm breath against his skin was more real than anything he had ever felt before, and that the slender body he so desperately held onto was not going to disappear as soon as he as much as thought of letting it go.

If it was up to Dream, he’d have chosen this very moment to live in forever. He forgot about everything; his job, his hobbies, his past, his present and his future. All that his mind was chanting like a mantra was _George_ , all that his senses could pick up was _George_ , and all that Dream ever wanted was _George._

“You’re here.”, Dream breathed in disbelief, his voice barely above a whisper, but he knew George had understood him when he felt the other’s lips stretch into a content smile.

“I am,” he said just as quietly, and Dream decided then and there that he’d never ever tire of George’s voice, “I hope that’s okay?”

Dream lifted his head a little, so did George, and they were so close their noses could have been touching. They both chose to ignore their mutual blush as they just started at each other, the intimacy of their situation making Dream’s mind run countless of miles an hour.

“Of course, oh fuck, you’re _here_!”, Dream exclaimed, letting out a laugh that held so much surprised happiness, he didn’t know if he’d ever sounded this joyful.

George’s smiled widened into a grin, and Dream felt his knees about to give out under him.

God, George was _stunning_. There was no word that could have ever fully described how beautiful he was, how his deeply pink cheeks looked like soft strokes of paint across a marvellous canvas, how his eyes sparkled with a light that could have lit up the entire night sky. Dream basked in the pure delight that felt almost like liquid sunlight at the other’s brilliant smile, he could have spent days tracing every little part of George’s face, and he’d never tire of being able to look at him this closely, this incredibly intimately.

There was nothing all around him; George was the centre of his universe. Dream, ever so selfishly, hoped for the moment to never stop.

But of course, reality and dreams could never exist as one, so George took a small step back, removing himself from Dream’s silently quivering body, and the latter felt his soul freeze in the warm light of the day.

“I’m sorry, this was a little, eh, unexpected,” George started, chuckling nervously, Dream summoned all the willpower he could possibly have to not blatantly stare at George’s pink lips, “I hope you’re not mad.”

“Mad?”, Dream asked in disbelief, his mind still hadn’t fully processed this situation so he hoped that whatever he was telling George was not gibberish, “Holy shit, George! I’m so happy to see you!”

“Really?”, George’s eyes somehow lit up even more and Dream had never loved being blinded as much as he did, now.

“You’re such an idiot, of course! God, I’ve missed you so much.”, Dream let out disbelievingly before he hugged George again, just because he could. He damned all of his overthinking until his mind was filled with nothing but everything that was George, and he banished every fear he had felt about being affectionate towards the older. Fuck, he’d combust if he didn’t hold George close to his body right now.

“I’ve missed you, too.”, came George’s reply, and Dream loved how he could hear his own racing heartbeat in his ears at that.

Yet, he knew that this moment couldn’t last forever, and Dream mourned the loss of George’s touch as soon as the other took a full step back, leaving them at a comfortable distance that Dream loathed more than he could possibly articulate.

He took one last second to stare at George, no filter in place, he had nothing but adoration in his eyes. Dream knew that he probably looked like a lovesick fool, but if he was being honest with himself, he absolutely was one, there was no need to pretend, not now, not in front of George. He’d worry about his actions later, when his body was further away from George, allowing him to function like a normal human being.

“Sorry, uhm, were you planning to head somewhere?”, George asked sheepishly as he eyed Dream curiously, and Dream took a second too long to process the other’s words.

“Huh?”, he asked dumbly and George chuckled, gesturing to the bag he had allowed to fall to the ground at some point during their encounter.

Dream felt his cheeks darken a little more in embarrassment; he had completely forgotten that he actually had things to do.

“Oh, I was just planning to buy some groceries.”, he replied, picking up the bag from the ground and patting it a little so the dust would come off.

George nodded. “Sorry to interrupt. Should I come back later?”

Dream should have been embarrassed at the urgency in his voice, and he was, but George’s giggle was so worth it. “NO! I mean, no, it’s fine, I can go another day.”

George shook his head, subtly peeking behind Dream and into his house. “Nope. I bet you don’t have anything in that fridge of yours, you better go buy some food.”

He paused a little, looking at Dream with a gaze that almost seemed…shy. “Maybe I could, uhm, tag along? Maybe you need a hand?”

Of course, Dream would have agreed either way, but something about torturing himself with the domesticity of this situation seemed a little too appealing. “Yes, I could really need some help. Get in the car.”

George wiggled a little and Dream thought he had died for a split second and come back to life because _fucking hell, why was George this fucking adorable?_

“Lead the way!”, George said excitedly before he started following a very flustered Dream.

Who knew all it took to make him go insane was one surprise visit from George and an awfully intimate hug?

George would be the death of him, and Dream made sure to enjoy the last breaths he took.

They both got into Dream’s car and all of a sudden Dream realized something.

“George? Where’s your luggage?”

George looked a little thoughtful for a second, and Dream wondered what it meant. “It’s in my hotel room.”

“Oh?”, Dream asked.

Somehow, he’d expected George to come to Florida and just…show up on his doorstep.

“Yeah, I’ve actually,” the other started, biting his lip slightly, “I’ve actually been in Florida for a few days now, my hotel’s not that far away from here.”

Dream furrowed his brows. “Wait, so you’ve already been here for a while and haven’t told me? George! I could have at least picked you up from the airport or something.”

George sighed. “I know, I know. But I didn’t want to bother you? My visit’s sudden as is, I didn’t want to give you even more stress.”

Dream reached across the armrest to put a reassuring hand on George’s. The other’s eyes immediately shot down to stare at Dream’s hand, and it took all of him not to retract it like it had been burned. Dream had to remind himself that George wasn’t someone who was big on physical affection; one of Dream’s biggest fears was to make George uncomfortable, so he reprimanded himself harshly before he said what he had to in order to make the removal of the hand less rushed and awkward.

“George,” he said gently, lifting his hand and putting it back on his own lap, George’s eyes followed it all the way there, “you never bother me, ever.”

George looked up at him, and Dream was glad to see relief in the other’s eyes. “I appreciate the sentiment, but it’s really no biggie. Are you planning to stay in the hotel?”

George looked unsure. “Yeah, I guess? Where else would I stay?”

Dream resisted the urge to snort. “Well, you could always stay at my place?”

George’s uncertainty seemed to deepen, and there was a lot of money Dream would have paid to find out what the other was thinking about so intensely. “Wouldn’t that be weird?”

“Weird?”, Dream asked with a surprised tone.

Of all the things he had expected George to say, this wasn’t one of them.

“Well,” George started, and he brought up his hand to rub the back of his neck, “I didn’t know if you’d be comfortable with me just barging into your home unannounced, so I booked a hotel. I know we’ve met before, and we’ve been friends for years, but I didn’t want to overstep a potential boundary.”

Dream smiled at his best friend softly, heart fluttering quietly at George’s thoughtfulness. “That’s really sweet of you, George, but I really don’t mind. I’d actually love to welcome you into my home for the duration of your stay, as long as you want to. If you would rather stay in the hotel, that’s also fine with me.”

George didn’t even take two seconds to reply.

“You can bet your ass I want to explore your house, Dream.”, he said and they both started laughing.

“Then it’s settled. We can get your stuff on our way back from the store.”, Dream replied, starting his car and backing out of his driveway.

When they were on the road, George suddenly spoke up.“Ew.”

Dream chuckled at the utter disgust in the other’s voice.

“This is so weird; you guys have the wheel on the wrong side of the car.”

“Aww, is Georgie getting car sick?”, Dream teased, purposefully driving a little harshly to the side when he saw that the next car was well out of reach.

George gripped onto the sides, turning his head to glare at Dream. Even when Dream could only see the other’s expression out of the corner of his eyes, he could still feel its burning intensity. “Don’t do that! And no, I’m not car sick, I am just confused, is all.”

“Sure, sure.”, Dream said smugly and George rolled his eyes, but Dream knew the older enough to see the fondness behind that action.

“I’m glad you’re here.”, he said after a while of them basking in comfortable silence, and Dream couldn’t help but feel his heart soar at the absolute easiness of this situation.

Him and George had always had such an easy dynamic; their balance couldn’t even be swayed the tiniest bit when they broke their barrier of virtuality and ventured into reality. Dream had always loved how his every action around George felt like the most natural thing in the world; like it was meant to be. God, he hoped it was.

George smiled at him, and Dream’s entire body froze when he sensed George’s gentle fingers touch his hair to remove a little fabric lint with so much care, Dream could feel the warmth radiating from George’s soft hand. The older let his hand linger in Dream’s hair just long enough for it to still seem unintentional, before he removed it and gently tossed the tiny thing behind them and into the backseats.

“Me, too.”, the brunette answered.

Dream hoped George could feel how much those words meant to him.

For the rest of the car ride, Dream put on some ridiculous song he found on Spotify, and George immediately started to scream, rather than sing, along. Dream, of course, the ever-soft simp, joined in and they sang until they reached the supermarket that Dream had absolutely not chosen intentionally as it was the one furthest away from his place but still not far enough away for George to wonder why it took them so long to get there.

They exited the car and as Dream watched George stretch his long limbs, he decided that there was no place he’d rather be.

___

When Dream opened the front door for George and the other entered, the lady of the house immediately came to inspect. Dream watched with gleeful eyes as two of his favourite beings finally met.

“Patches!”, George exclaimed in excitement, and the cat eyed him curiously.

Dream observed as George carefully stretched out his hand for her to sniff, and as soon as she did, she snuggled her head against the older’s fingers, a happy giggle shaking George’s shoulders at that before he gently scratched the space behind her ear and Patched purred approvingly.

Dream smiled contently. Thank God, George was Patches-Approved.

He went back outside to get the groceries, and he allowed for the two to bond while he carried everything inside. He doubted George even realized he had moved at all.

“Oh, you really are cuddly, the rumours are true.”, George said softly after she gave him a small lick, before turning her attention on the groceries Dream had just carried inside.

“She is, but not with everyone.”, Dream explained while he gave her a few scratches, too.

George looked so happy and so comfortable; Dream realized that living would be both easier and harder now.

George stood up and picked up one of the bags. “Here, let me help you.”

Dream nodded. “Thank you. The kitchen’s this way, follow me.”

George fake-gasped as they entered the room and Dream rolled his eyes at him. “Oh, the infamous kitchen!”

“The kitchen is anything but infamous.”, Dream stated and George shrugged.

“Twitter would say otherwise.”

“Who cares about Twitter, anyway?”, Dream asked.

“Tommy does.”

“True.”

George started helping out with unpacking the groceries, and Dream realized how much they’d actually bought.

“George, you really think you’ll be able to eat all of this?”, he asked, tone laced with suspicion.

George glared at him playfully. “Yeah? Don’t underestimate my hunger.”

Dream lifted his hands in defeat and George shook his head, the blonde didn’t fail to see the tiny smile playing on his lips.

George’s stay already felt so natural; Dream was beginning to worry him leaving would hurt more than he anticipated.

But it was worth it; seeing George act so comfortable in Dream’s presence, as if they did this every single day, as if they hadn’t spent years without knowing each other’s faces, without having met in person. Dream loved the fact that after only a couple of minutes, George already knew how to navigate his kitchen, and was lecturing him on how uselessly complicated his system of storing plates was. He loved how George would so casually pet Patches who walked up to him without much hesitation, and he loved how George started to talk about his plans for the next days, all of them involving Dream. 

Dream loved how George felt the same outside as inside the screen.

Dream loved that George belonged.

___

George was soundly snoring next to Dream, his head on the younger’s shoulder as it had dropped further and further the deeper he had fallen into slumber. Dream felt his body oddly tense at the presence of the other, and he wasn’t sure if he could move much. George was a very heavy sleeper, but somehow Dream was worried to wake the other up nonetheless.

So, instead Dream chose to study George’s features. His hair was tussled and messy, sticking out from all sides because of the way he’d shifted before falling asleep. His expression was so peaceful, his eyebrows only occasionally twitching slightly. His lips were pouty and his breaths were slow and steady.

They had both agreed on a movie night, each got to pick a movie. Dream had insisted on watching ‘Princess and the Frog’, while George had sworn to leave America the very next day if Dream refused to watch ‘Legally Blonde’ with him. In the end, those two movies were the only ones they managed to watch because George fell asleep quicker than it took Dream to finish looking through his DVD-collection.

The TV had been turned off, the lights dimmed, and Dream hadn’t been able to resist lowering himself next to George, whipping out his phone to check his social medias before he could convince himself that he should just leave George and go to bed.

But his phone had quickly become irrelevant after his own traitorous eyes kept drifting over to George’s lean body. In the end, he gave in, because Dream was a weak man when it came to anything George-related.

George was the sweetest temptation Dream had ever come across, and he had stupidly let himself be swayed and brought to the brunette’s side where he couldn’t escape from, not even if he tried.

Dream didn’t dare to look for too long, he didn’t want to feel like a creep. Seeing George like that, so utterly calm and vulnerable, made something within Dream tell him that he wasn’t supposed to witness this.

George was really here, by his side, like Dream had yearned after for so long. It was hard to imagine that he wasn’t dreaming, that this wasn’t wishful thinking.

Dream listened to George’s breathing and it was the most beautiful, complex symphony in his ears. His body, as tense as it was, also felt amazing. Dream felt safer around George than he did around anyone else; he could let go, he could let his guard down and loosen his tongue. There was no need to worry, not with George, not ever.

The brunette had an understanding of others like no one else Dream had ever met. He sensed when someone wasn’t feeling well, way before anyone else did. He had a way with words that could calm the most turbulent person, and he was able to make anyone feel at home if he tried.

Dream could not think about a single moment in time when he had felt awkward around George, the other’s people-skills were working their magic. Dream believed it was because of years’ worth of observing others and studying them in silence that George could read anyone and everyone so well.

And yet, he didn’t seem to be able to read Dream. The blonde often wondered if George knew, secretly. He wondered if the other picked up on his pathetic attempts at flirting, and his shy silences whenever he felt like he had overstepped. He contemplated if George had caught onto the tone of Dream’s voice, the underlying implications of his carefully chosen words. He tried to figure out whether George knew or whether he didn’t, or whether he chose not to try because he trusted Dream to show him, instead.

The older shifted a little, and to Dream’s surprise, he felt himself relax rather than stiffen when George cuddled up to his side a little closer.

Dream brought up his hand and carefully put it in George’s hair, unsure of himself.

 _This is fine, this isn’t weird,_ he told himself as he started to gently run his fingers through George’s hair like he had dreamt of doing for so long, and he softly begun massaging the other’s scalp. Dream could both hear and feel George sigh in his sleep contently, his head growing a little heavier on the blonde’s shoulder.

Dream leaned his own head back, staring up at the ceiling.

George’s body was so warm by his side; Dream felt like he’d freeze to death if he moved away any further.

He felt so safe, so comfortable, he could have cried. His heart was beating gently, quicker than George’s, but their rhythms still complimented each other. Something about having the other so close made Dream all too aware of his entire body, and the way George made both excitement and content pulse through his veins. He felt positively light.

Dream closed his eyes, allowing for his body to get rid of all the tension there still could have been. George’s body felt heavier to his side, but Dream loved the feeling of the other being this close. He loved how he could feel George’s chest rise and fall, how his warm breath would hit his shoulder and neck.

In all the months Dream had lived in this house, he had never felt quite at home like he did now.

George belonged. He belonged the same way Dream and Patches did. The way his furniture did, his setup and his things. He belonged the way his family did whenever they visited, when his friends came over. He belonged like everything Dream ever loved, and so much more. It was painful to imagine a reality where one day, Dream would wake up and not find George in his house. The thought alone made his body shudder with a sudden brush of cold.

But it would happen, God, Dream knew. George came to visit, so he would leave, eventually. As much as Dream longed for him to stay, he could never ask something like that of the other. George had an entire life back in Britain; family, friends, pets, a home, a job, responsibilities. Dream was one of the only things tying him to America. It was never enough to make George stay, and Dream was fine with that.

All Dream hoped was that George would stay for a while, that he wouldn’t wake up the next day without the other near him. Dream wanted to allow himself to have this, this little illusion, for as long as he could. Selfish, he was selfish, but he couldn’t help himself, not when he had years to dream of a scenario like this without ever imagining it turning into reality.

How long did Dream have before George would slip through his fingers again?

George had come to see him; was this the irrational decision he had been talking about?

Dream lay there, wondering. Something was going on with his best friend, he knew that much. As exciting as his visit was, as many moments of fluttering hearts and shy smiles there were, Dream could never shake the feeling that something was _off_.

For just the briefest of moments, something in George’s eyes would change, something in his smile would shift. For only a few seconds, Dream could see something within George he didn’t understand, and something about that terrified him.

He knew pretty much most of what he could know about George. They told each other everything, and some things were just a given.

And yet, George had acted off for a while. Dream wasn’t quite sure when it had started, but at some point, George had begun to act weird. He’d sometimes zone out, there would be odd and misplaced silences in-between their usual banter. He’d stare into space, or his expression would morph into something Dream couldn’t quite interpret.

The blonde couldn’t put a finger on what was going on, he had hoped for George to come along, but it didn’t seem like the other would.

Dream didn’t want to intrude, he didn’t want to bother the other, but he was also worried. Whatever was going on with his best friend must have been important, since George hadn’t acted this off since, well, a few years, actually. Maybe ever. Dream wasn’t sure anymore.

He wanted to give him time, he wanted to let the other tell him at his own pace, but he was starting to wonder if George was too scared to tell him. Dream was worried that it was something that pained the other and he simply didn’t know how to talk about it, how to bring it up. Dream wanted to be there for George, but the other had assured him it was fine.

Maybe George would tell Dream, now that he was here.

Maybe he was here precisely for that reason.

Dream’s tired mind started to black out occasionally, and before he knew it, he had fallen asleep, hand still tangled with George’s hair and his body pressed against the other’s, fitting together like two pieces of a puzzle.

___

“Oh c’mon, you have to tell me!”, George demanded with an underlying playful urgency as he sighed, looking out of the window instead of facing Dream.

The latter smiled. “But that would ruin the surprise!”

George seemed to pout a little. “I don’t care about surprises! I hate the fact that you’re taking me somewhere I don’t know.”

Dream clicked his tongue. “Dude, you don’t know any place in Florida! Just let me have this, yeah? I want this to be a surprise for you, I actually put quite some work into this.”

“Fine.”, George agreed begrudgingly.

Dream sighed contently, staring at the road.

The sun would be setting soon, but they had enough time before that.

Dream felt nervous and he didn’t fully understand why. He knew everything was organized, he knew he could trust his friends to set everything up, but the atmosphere and implications of the situation made him feel woozy.

Because really, in Dream’s eyes, this was something it wasn’t.

Under the pretence of showing George around Florida, Dream could find a plethora of excuses to spend time with the other in a way that anyone else would have taken a second glance at.

It was one of those things he had always dreamed of doing as a way to cope, and Dream didn’t even find it within himself to feel guilty about it.

George had agreed to hang out with Dream, and that would be exactly what they’d be doing.

And yet, Dream’s foolish heart couldn’t help but beat faster as he anticipated George’s reaction. He wanted to see the way his friend’s face would light up, he wanted to hear his laughter echo across the clearing until the stars would sing along.

Because in Dream’s heart, hushed and silenced brutally by his mind, was the little hope that this was more than a friendly hangout. A ridiculous part of Dream hoped for nothing more than George to know that to him, this was different.

That this was a date.

In no reality could Dream have ever had the actual courage to ask George, to straight up walk towards him and offer his hand with promises of endless adventures.

Dream just couldn’t, the words he ached to say alone were enough to make his mouth go dry and his heart beat haywire.

He felt horrible about it, but he reasoned with himself that this was for the better. Above everything, he wanted George to have a nice time, so he made sure to remind himself not to be in the way of that.

They left the car after only a few minutes and Dream nervously checked his phone. They only had to walk a few feet to get to the destination, and with each new step, Dream felt both more nervous and excited. After all, he was incredibly proud of what he had arranged, and he hoped George would love it just as much as he did.

And truth be told, he probably loved it more.

“No way…”, George uttered as if he was starstruck and his eyes roamed the little picknick area with unabashed wonder.

Dream felt himself sigh quietly in relief as he followed George’s eyes, noting that his friends had managed to outdo themselves with the setup; it looked even better than what Dream had asked of them.

Out there, in a small remote clearing a little outside the city, was a very beautiful weeping willow, hidden away by the miniature forest surrounding it. Under the tree’s mighty branches, Dream had kindly asked his friends to deliver and set up a nice picknick; with a blanket, decorative lights and a basket full of goods.

Dream couldn’t wait to see what it would look like once the sun actually set, but for now he was more than happy since George seemed to ooze with admiration.

“Holy shit, this is actually so pretty! Did you do all of this?”, he asked, walking a few steps forward and going around the tree, taking in the scenery.

Dream nodded. “Kind of. I organized and bought everything, but some of my friends set it up since I had to drive you here.”

“Wow…”, George murmured, looking back at Dream and flashing him a brilliant smile. “Twitter would have a field day if they knew about this.”

Dream groaned as George giggled mercilessly, and the blonde hoped that George didn’t actually realise that he’d hit a little too close to home with his innocent implication.

“But come on, let’s sit down.”, Dream announced and took the initiative to make himself comfortable on the fluffy blanket, George quickly following suit.

The ground was hard underneath them, but Dream still thought it was very cosy due to the blanket’s thickness.

They both just sat there in silence for a few moments, breathing in the slightly chilly evening air. Dream closed his eyes and smiled, not believing his luck.

He’d planned this for months. Sometimes, he lay awake and imagined organizing a picknick in this specific spot, for his and George’s eyes only. He dreamt about the decorations, where he’d place things, the foods he’d bring, everything.

Whenever Dream wasn’t able to fall asleep, he’d envision this exact scenario, and it never failed to help him fall asleep like a gentle lullaby.

“So, what’s the plan?”, George eventually asked and Dream opened his eyes to turn his head towards his best friend.

The blonde let out a thoughtful sound. “I guess we just sit and talk? Oh, and eat, of course!”

George chuckled and scooted over to be closer to the basket, taking a peek inside and letting out a yelp of surprise. “You brought so much!”

“Well, you’re always starving.”, Dream replied and George rolled his eyes, taking out the first thing he saw. Kind of basic, but Dream had tried his hardest to make the sandwiches look fancy.

George handed him his share of the food and Dream thanked him, carefully unwrapping the bread.

George took a bite and hummed contently. “You sure know how to make a good sandwich. I didn’t know you were a cook.”

Dream snorted. “I cooked you breakfast this morning!”

“Whatever. This tastes fancier than plain pancakes.”, George noted and took another bite while Dream tried to supress a happy giggle.

“Don’t you dare insult my pancakes! And this is nothing fancy, it’s just a sandwich, George.”, he said but noted that they had indeed turned out oddly good. Maybe Alyssa had sprinkled something in to save it.

After they were done, George looked up at Dream. “Should we go for a walk? The sun’s still out and I want to explore this area.”

Dream shrugged. “Sure, but there’s really nothing special around here.”

“You’ve been here often?”, George asked as he stood up and waited for Dream to do so, as well.

Dream nodded. “Yeah. I used to come here all the time, actually, especially when I was a teen.”

George let out a sound of acknowledgement and they both started walking, Dream’s eyes wandering over to George without him being able to change anything about it.

The sun hung very low in the sky already; the clouds were coloured with so many different shades of orange and pink, Dream noted that the sky seemed especially bright tonight. It looked like a painting; if Dream focused hard enough, he could see the gentle strokes of a brush dancing across a canvas. He wondered if, for George, this looked just as magical.

The first mistake he made that night was turn his gaze away from the sky and immediately to George.

Somehow, not for the first time, the other managed to knock out the air of Dream’s oh so vulnerable chest.

The strands of George’s hair had a slight orange glow to them, fluffy and rustled due to the wind. His face was positively glowing; not only did he look the calmest and most comfortable Dream had probably ever seen him, but his usually pale skin seemed to be covered in golden particles, making it seem like he was emitting a soft warmth from his flushed cheeks.

Dream stared, because fuck, what else could he do? George was the most beautiful human he had ever seen, and his beauty was so intoxicatingly captivating, Dream’s eyes remained trained on his friend’s charming face, unable to breathe.

_Alluring, enchanting, ethereal._

Dream couldn’t help but gaze in desperation at the object of his boundless admiration.

The air around them was oddly icy; a warm scarf wrapped around the brunette’s neck covered parts of his face in a way that made him look much gentler, much more vulnerable.

All Dream wanted to do was reach out when his longing gaze fell onto George’s small hands, partly covered by the hoodie’s sweater paws he was wearing underneath his jacket.

Dream’s face flushed; the hoodie’s sleeves seemed all too familiar.

_“George, what are you doing in my room?”, Dream asked as he entered and threw a confused look his friend’s way._

_The brunette turned around confidently as if he hadn’t just been caught going through Dream’s closet._

_“I’m cold.”, was all he said._

_Dream frowned. “It’s like, so warm outside.”_

_“For you, maybe,” George replied while he turned around as if this was the most natural thing he’d ever done, “but I am always cold, and I didn’t bring any clothes that are warm enough. So, yours will have to do.”_

_Dream snorted. “You could have just asked, you know? Instead of breaking into my room and going through my closet like a freak?”_

_George only sighed in return. “Well, lesson learned. Anyways, which hoodie can I take?”_

_Dream felt his cheeks warm a little. “Uhm, just choose one, I don’t mind.”_

_George nodded and reached for Dream’s favourite hoodie. Of course._

_“Is this one fine?”, George asked as he turned around and Dream just nodded to distract his thoughts._

_“More than fine.”_

_George looked at him for a second too long before his eyes lit up. “Thanks!”_

_The older immediately raised the hoodie and put it on, looking at Dream with a smug expression. “Very comfy, thanks again, Dream!”_

_Dream murmured a_ you’re welcome _as he watched George walk out the room as if nothing had happened._

_But, oh well, all that was on Dream’s mind for the entire rest of the day was how adorable George looked, nearly drowning in a hoodie that was his and would soon smell of George, instead._

“I like this.”, George spoke up, consequently causing Dream’s eyes to dart back up to his face.

“What?”, he asked.

George smiled. “I like this area, it’s very calm. As much as I love living in a city, I’d go insane if I didn’t visit nature every once in a while.”

Dream reciprocated the other’s content expression. “Yeah, that’s why I loved coming here. Most of the time I’d bike over.”

George’s eyebrows rose. “You came here by bicycle? That’s such a long way!”

“It was worth it.”, Dream answered and George nodded with understanding.

It really was worth it; this was the place Dream would go to and hide whenever he felt like his feelings got too much for him to handle. The area always did wonders to his inner turmoil.

He came here after his first breakup, and his last. He came here after he’d kept failing at an important coding project, and whenever a fight with his family had turned too intense. This was his safe space, and he had brought George here.

Why? Because George was his safe haven, too.

As a kid, he’d always wondered what it would be like to bring someone he loved here. To Dream, the place was like a little secret; none of his friends and family truly knew where he’d disappear for hours, but they trusted him to be safe.

And safe, he was, always. No one else ever came around here, there were so many prettier places, so many other remote areas where people could go to. They never came to this clearing, and Dream loved it.

And George seemed to love it, too.

The brunette smiled. “I’m sure it was.”

Dream looked ahead, and the way George had said those words with so much affection lingered on his skin like the warmth of a fireplace in the middle of a harsh winter.

“I think we should head back.”, Dream suggested after a while.

The sun had officially set and the darkness had enveloped them, the only source of light being the moon and the very distant lights of the picknick place.

Dream looked at George and tried not to make his gaze linger.

“You’re right.”, and so they did.

The way the little chain lights made it seem like the tree was full of fireflies made Dream’s chest erupt with sparks. It looked so beautiful; Dream felt like tearing up. In all the years he’d come here, he had never bothered to decorate the place. Never, until today.

George was talking animatedly about something he’d recently discussed with Sapnap and Dream sat there, with his tea warm between his hands, listening carefully and occasionally adding a few comments here and there.

Carefree, God, he hadn’t felt this carefree in such a long time.

“But I told him that it wasn’t a good idea, you know? I just think it’s objectively bad.”, George finished and took a sip of his own drink.

Dream nodded. “Yeah, from what you’ve told me, it really does sound horrible. I sometimes wonder where the dude has his head.”

“High up in the clouds,” George gestured and Dream wheezed, “so high up he can’t even see the ground anymore.”

And as the moon rose higher in the sky, they kept talking, and something within Dream clicking in place.

“Can I ask you something?”, Dream said after a while.

George just nodded from where he had lay down to rest his back, peeking out with one eye between the arm he had covered his face with. “Sure.”

“Why did you come here?”

For whatever reason, Dream felt the air around them shift. George averted his gaze and covered his eyes again, much to the blonde’s dismay.

Even after all the conversations they’d had, Dream realized that he had never actually asked George why he had come here. The other had told him that his stay was pretty much unlimited, since he hadn’t booked a ticket back just yet, but the older had never mentioned any particular reason as to why he was in America in the first place.

And Dream? He was a very curious person, and something within him felt an odd sense of confusion at certain things George did.

He had noticed it early on; sometimes, George seemed to stare at him. But whenever Dream asked what was wrong, the brunette would brush him off and not offer him any explanation. There were also times when Dream would notice how George seemed to react oddly to certain things he did, most notably the whole deal with the hoodie.

_Dream walked into the living room, only to find George half asleep on the couch, Patches on his lap and Dream’s hoodie on his frame._

_The blonde stared at him and tried to calm down, because really; George wearing his hoodie wasn’t that big of a deal, right?_

_Who was he kidding? It was._

_So, before he could turn into a stuttering mess, Dream chose to resort to teasing, instead._

_“You really like that hoodie, don’t you?”_

_George seemed wide awake all of a sudden, jolting up and startling Patches so much she angrily jumped off and waltzed out of the room._

_“Whatd’you mean?”, he asked, voice more quiet than usual._

_Dream smiled slyly. “You sure seem to wear that hoodie a lot, aren’t you a lot warmer by now?”_

_“Oh, shut up.”, George bit back and leaned against the couch again, his expression indicating that he was very much displeased with Dream’s jokes on his expense._

_“C’mon, Georgie, it’s okay. I know you love me so much; you’d do anything to be closer to me.”, Dream let out and wondered immediately after why coping with teasing was so much easier than facing things head-on._

_“That’s not-, oh my God, just shut up.”, George replied and turned his face away from Dream._

_“Look at us; sharing clothes like boyfriends! Aren’t we adorable?”, Dream was starting to wonder if he was a masochist._

_George stayed silent for too long, if it wasn’t for his irregular breathing Dream might have believed the other had fallen asleep._

_The blonde was going to say something else but he stopped himself when he noticed that George actually seemed a little upset. Why was that now?_

_“George?”, he tried, slowly walking towards the couch._

_No response._

_“George, c’mon, what’s wrong?”, he was beginning to worry a little._

_“Nothing, I’m just tired and cold.”, George answered and Dream’s frown deepened._

_This was incredibly odd behaviour for George._

_“Are you sure? Are you maybe getting sick? I have some medicine that could help.”, Dream suggested carefully, walking closer towards George who had now fully turned his back to him._

_He seemed somewhat nervous, shy._

_The brunette let out a sigh, and Dream immediately got the message. “Yeah, I’m sure. Just drop it, Dream.”_

_Without saying another word, he turned around and left George to deal with…whatever he was dealing with._

_It was so weird, and Dream was confused; sometimes George seemed to be on high-alert._

_They’d be hanging out and bickering like they always did, but in one moment Dream would say something cheesy or teasing, and George would grow a little, well, distant._

_This normally wouldn’t have worried Dream, since he knew George could sometimes get awkward, especially with affection, but this situation in combination with George’s odd behaviour the past few months only piled more worries onto the mountain of concern Dream was harbouring for George within his heart._

_Had he overstepped? Had he done the one thing he swore he wouldn’t?_

_But George had never minded his teasing before, they’d said things that were much more intense than this. All Dream did just now was tease George about wearing his hoodie for the entire day, when the brunette clearly knew Dream was more than fine with it!_

_It really wasn’t a big deal, friends shared clothes sometimes, especially when one of them was lacking some garment that the other had in store readily._

_So why did George act like being called out for wearing Dream’s hoodie, with his permission, was enough to get all upset about?_

_Dream didn’t know, and he spent a long time debating everything in his head, seated at the kitchen table. It was getting late so he stood up and walked to the living room, only to find George sound asleep on the couch._

_For a brief moment, he debated carrying the other to bed, but he snapped out of it before he would make George feel even more conflicted. Instead, he brought the warmest blanket he owned and covered the brunette with it, making sure that George had all the pillows he needed in case he woke up at night and felt stiff._

_The next morning, George sat with him and ate breakfast like nothing had ever happened, and he was still wearing Dream’s hoodie, he would be for the rest of the day._

_Dream wondered what was going on inside of George’s head._

So, ever since George had come to America, he had moments where he was seemingly zoning out.

Dream was worried because he knew George was dealing with something in private, and all he wanted was for the other to reach out and allow Dream in so he could offer him comfort, offer him reassurance.

“I don’t,” George started, Dream could see that he bit his lip, “I don’t know.”

Dream looked away from him. “I don’t believe that.”

George sighed. “Me, either.”

Dream looked back to George; the other’s eyes were already on him.

“I guess I just…wanted to see you?”, the brunette said so carefully Dream wondered what the underlying meaning of that statement was.

“And you came to America on a whim just for that?”, Dream asked with suspicion.

George sighed. “I guess you can say that. Can you fault me for missing my best friend?”

“Well, no. It’s just not really _you_ to up and abandon your life at home to come to a foreign country, just because you felt like it?”, Dream replied just as carefully.

“Maybe I was feeling adventurous.”

“I don’t believe that, either.”

George sighed more deeply and sat up, looking straight ahead instead of facing Dream. “Look, Dream,”

“I don’t know, okay? I just…there is a reason, but I can’t tell you right now, I don’t think I can. You’ve been the best host these past few days, and I appreciate you so much for just welcoming me into your home with open arms. You know that there’s something I’m dealing with right now, so it’s been a bit, well, turbulent.”

Dream looked at George and wondered why he had changed his behaviour so much all of a sudden. They’d not had issues with talking about feelings for years now, what huge thing must have been going on for George to just stay silent?

“Why don’t you talk to me, Georgie?”, Dream asked and he hoped that his friend could hear the countless questions he chose not to voice.

George looked at him with a look so guilty the blonde felt like it was a tiny punch in the gut. “I want to. It’s complicated, Dream.”

And really, Dream wanted to argue. Well, not argue, per se, but he wanted to understand why George had suddenly turned this secretive, what was oh so important and confusing that it couldn’t be shared with him.

George had told him some of his most personal problems, so whatever this was, it must have a reason why Dream was not told. And as hard as it was, no matter how worried Dream was, he had to trust George. He had to trust him that if there was anything the blonde could do to help, the other would tell him right away.

George hadn’t had to deal with something alone in so long, Dream hoped he wasn’t hurting.

“I’ll tell you, eventually.”, George said and Dream remained silent, unable to come up with an adequate response.

They sat there, looking at the stars, when George said something that would haunt Dream for a while.

“I really am sorry, Dream. I can’t tell you just yet, because,” he seemed nervous all of a sudden, Dream wanted to reach out and soothe his trembling hand, “Because it involves you.”

And really, it was funny how quickly Dream’s life seemed to turn upside down.

Him? Whatever George had going on had to do with Dream?

Thousands, no, millions of thoughts hit Dream’s head like a brick and he felt his heart tighten.

What had he done? Had he made George uncomfortable, after all? Had it been something he’d said, or implied?

Oh God, _did George know?_

Dream felt his entire body go cold as if someone had dumped a bucket of water on him while he was standing outside during an icy night.

What else could it be? Dream couldn’t think of anything. George must have found out, somehow, he must know.

Oh, what a way to end the day.

If Dream had been alone, he might have cried. The shame he felt was crushing his soul, and he couldn’t help but fault himself for not concealing his feelings well enough, for not being careful enough.

George probably knew, and it was a burden to him. Or the blonde had done something even worse to hurt George.

Dream had fucked up.

The second mistake he made that night was not ask what George meant by that.

“Okay.”, was all he replied.

He felt George’s head turn to face him, but Dream didn’t take his eyes off of the brightest star he could see.

_“Are you sure this is a good idea?”, George asked as he giggled between every word._

_They had just gotten back from their little walk and Dream was trying to convince George to climb the tree with him._

_“I’m positive! I’ve done this countless times, George, don’t worry!”_

_The brunette sighed. “If you’re sure.”_

_And after a few minor accidents, both of them were sat atop a wide branch._

_The moon was shining ardently between the brightly coloured leaves of the weeping willow. Dream saw George stretch out his hand in front of him, looking at the moonlight shining through his fingers with a fascinated gaze._

_The words_ You’re beautiful _were burning on Dream’s tongue pleasantly, but he refused to let them out. This moment was magical; he didn’t want to ruin it._

_“You know,” George started all of a sudden, the gentle sound of the wind making the falling leaves rustle soundly, filling their ears with the quiet melody tenderly, “You fascinate me, Dream.”_

_“Oh?”, he asked, fingers shaking slightly from where he was burying them deeply into the pockets of his jacket._

_“Yeah.”, George breathed, and Dream felt like this moment held a special significance he couldn’t quite understand, but he didn’t dare move in fear of shattering whatever moment they were having, whatever emotion was colouring George’s voice as he spoke next;_

_“Sometimes I feel like the entire world is rushing by me, and you’re the only one that slows down.”_

_Dream’s eyes met his, and the blonde knew that if he hadn’t had years’ worth of practice, he’d have broken down and kissed George right then and there, on the weeping willow he’d cried under countless times as a teen._

_He felt like he understood what George meant, but at the same time, he didn’t. George was looking at him with something swimming in his eyes that Dream was too scared to name, he was too terrified to allow something as traitorous and destructive as hope to settle and bloom in his chest._

_So, Dream took his hand out of his pocket and offered it to George, not hiding anything and allowing his emotions to show in his eyes as clear as day. All George had to do was look._

_But, he didn’t. Instead, his gaze fell on Dream’s soft hand and with a gentle smile, George took it._

_Dream wrapped his hand around George’s smaller one and let it warm his entire body from the inside out. It was so soft; so smooth and careful and tender, so_ George _. Dream loved it, he was aching quietly, but oh, the touch burned him so pleasantly._

_Whatever it was that George was offering him, Dream was willing to take it. He would take anything as long as it meant having George around._

_He wished George had spent a little longer looking into his eyes._

They carried on as if nothing had been said at all, but Dream’s heart was beating painfully loudly in his chest.

George wasn’t doing well, and it was his fault.

Was he here to tell him that?

Worse yet, had George come to say goodbye?

Dream felt his entire perception of reality shatter and he decidedly ignored the quiet voice in his head that sounded suspiciously a lot like Sapnap telling him that he shouldn’t be jumping to conclusions like that.

But it was too late, and Dream felt like he had done everything wrong.

He hoped dearly that George didn’t resent him.

“We should head back.”, he said and stood up, George did the same.

They packed up everything in silence; Dream had never felt this cold around George.

He’d have to ask, eventually. He’d have to ask what George was going to do.

But for now, Dream did what he could do best; pretend.

They drove home in silence, too, and George fell asleep halfway there.

When they got to Dream’s house, the blonde stayed in the car for a very long time, just staring straight ahead, too scared to exit the vehicle in fear of having the weight of the situation crush him once he did.

He waited patiently until George seemed to stir in his sleep, before gently waking the other up.

They parted ways as they headed to their respective rooms, and for the first time, Dream felt like he didn’t belong in his own house.

___

George hadn’t left his room in a few hours. Dream knew he was awake.

It wasn’t that big of a deal; Dream had only opened his own door to go feed Patches and return right back to the room whose walls now seemed suffocating.

What the hell was going on?

As much as Dream tried to make sense of the situation, it just never seemed to work out the way he wanted it to.

Their picknick had begun so wonderfully; why had it ended the way it did?

Dream thought back on what they did, on what they said, and all there really was that stood out negatively was the point where George confessed that Dream was part of whatever dilemma he was experiencing.

He didn’t even elaborate. He said it was complicated. He said he couldn’t tell Dream just yet. Why did he sound so hurt when he told him those things?

Dream wanted to ask him, but he was too scared to push George too far. The last thing he wanted was for the brunette to close himself off completely.

What in the world had he done?

Dream knew that this was destructive; the longer he sat in his room and moped, the more his overthinking mind would be conjuring up all these scenarios full of draining doubts.

He didn’t go to knock on George’s door at first. He was avoiding him.

Why was running away from his problems always more compelling to Dream than just facing them head on?

He hated that it the thought of talking to George about all of this felt more dreadful than relieving.

Dream realized that he needed to talk to the other, and he needed to talk to him as fast as he could.

George was asleep when he knocked on his door later that day.

___

Dream gripped his phone tightly.

George had already gone to sleep and the house was quiet, the only sound that echoed across his room was the soft rainfall coming from his open window.

His room was dark; he had turned off all the lights and was just lying in bed, staring up at his plain ceiling, a feeling of déja-vu slowly spreading through his mind.

His phone lay heavy in his right hand, but there wasn’t really much to contemplate since he had already made up his mind.

Whenever Dream felt like the stones life threw his way got too much to bear, he always had three people he could rely on the most; George, Sapnap and Bad.

And yet, this situation was unique. Dream couldn’t talk to George about it, since it was about him and the blonde already felt like he had given the other enough burdens to deal with. He also couldn’t quite get himself to talk to Bad, even though the older male was the one whose judgment and advice Dream probably trusted the most, all because Bad didn’t know anything about Dream’s pathetic feelings for his best friend. The only person he could fully trust with that at the moment was Sapnap and he knew that no matter what, the other would always have time for him.

And right now, Dream needed nothing more than someone to talk to.

So, he dialled Sapnap’s number. Not Discord, not any other application. It felt oddly symbolic and nostalgic to just call him on his phone.

“Dream?”

The blonde sighed and closed his eyes, preparing himself. “Hey, Sapnap.”

“Man, you sound defeated, is everything alright?”, Sapnap asked and Dream could have laughed at the understatement.

“No, nothing’s alright. I feel like I have to deal with issue after issue.”, he replied honestly.

Sapnap hummed. “I see. Is this about George?”

Dream snorted. “I am pathetic, aren’t I? There are so many problems out there and here I am complaining about _that_.”

“Don’t say that,” Sapnap interrupted before Dream could go on, “just because there are bigger problems out there doesn’t mean yours is insignificant, and it doesn’t mean it’s not taking a toll on your mental health.”

“I guess.”, Dream admitted and didn’t dare say anything else.

“So, what’s going on, huh? Are you sick of our Georgie already?”, Sapnap tried to joke light-heartedly and Dream managed a half-hearted smile.

“No, it’s the other way around, probably.”

Sapnap’s tone dropped a little. “What? Is that what this is about?”

“Kind of.”, Dream murmured and sighed, sitting up in his bed and placing his feet back on the floor, leaning forward.

Sapnap’s tone was practically dripping with worry. “What happened? Did you guys have a fight?”

Dream propped his chin on the palm of his hand. “Not really. He just told me something.”

“What?”

“Remember how he used to act all weird a while ago?”, Dream asked.

Sapnap let out a sound of acknowledgement. “When he began to space out randomly and stuff?”

“Yeah, that,” Dream answered, “He told me what it’s about. Well, kind of.”

“Don’t tell me if it’s personal.”, Sapnap rushed and Dream let out a genuine chuckle.

“Don’t worry; if this was literally anything else, I’d not be telling you right now.”

Sapnap hummed. “Just making sure. So, what’s going on?”

“He,” Dream begun, his heart squeezing painfully at the memory, “He didn’t tell me any details, he still refuses to talk about it. But he…he did tell me one thing.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah,” Dream swallowed thickly, “He told me it has to do with me.”

Sapnap stayed silent for a while, thinking. Dream couldn’t blame him.

“Are you sure?”, Sapnap asked carefully.

Dream frowned. “He told me, and I quote, ‘I can’t tell you just yet because it involves you’.”

Sapnap clicked his tongue quietly. “Ouch. Did he elaborate on that?”

“No, that’s all he said.”, Dream let out, worry starting to capture his heart yet again. “I’m scared that he knows.”

“You think that’s it?”, Sapnap asked and Dream nodded to himself.

“What else could it be? I haven’t done anything that could have provoked a reaction like that, I’ve treated him the same way I always have. But this is obviously a big deal to him, he came here because of it.”

“Really?”, came Sapnap’s surprised question.

“Mhm,” Dream hummed and sighed right after, “He was acting all weird, then he randomly came to America, and then he told me the issue has to do with me. Not only that; he’s also been acting off here, too”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”, Dream was, too.

They stayed silent on the call for a while and Dream felt that with each passing second, the pit in his stomach kept growing larger and larger.

“I’m just,” the blonde tried, blinking away the tears trying to make it to the surface, “I’m just so scared to lose him, Sap.”

He could almost feel Sapnap’s gentle hand on his shoulder through his phone, and he wanted nothing more than to have his best friend right there with him so he could cry with his head on the other’s comforting shoulder. “You won’t, Dream.”

“How do you know that?”, his voice took on a defeated sound, and Dream felt very tired all of a sudden.

“I know George,” he replied somewhat sternly, Dream snapped a little out of it, “I know George enough to be sure that he’d never stop being friends with you because of something like feelings. C’mon, Dream, you know that, too. Don’t you remember the time when George’s friend told him she was in love with him? He didn’t love her back but they’re still friends to this day. And you, my friend, are his best friend; do you really, in all honestly, think he’d just give you up? George is not like that, and you know it.”

It was hard to argue with Sapnap’s points, but it was also hard to ignore his endless doubts. “Why does he sometimes look so uncomfortable, though? He keeps having those weird moments and I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.”

Sapnap sighed. “I can’t tell you that, Dream. Only George can. Why are you talking to me when you could be talking to him, instead? I don’t have the answers you need.”

“Because I trust you, Sapnap.”, Dream said, voice slightly tremulous. “You’re the one that’s known about my feelings for George from the beginning; of course, I’d talk to you!”

Sapnap’s gentle voice did wonders to the blonde’s harshly beating heart. “I know that, Dream, and I understand. But this isn’t just about your feelings; it’s about George’s, too.”

“I just don’t know what to do.”

“Talk to George.”, Sapnap deadpanned.

Dream groaned. “I can’t! He won’t fucking talk to me! Don’t you think I’ve tried? I’ve been asking him for _months_ , Sapnap, and he never gave me anything more than a horribly vague answer! I don’t want to push him, but I also don’t want to just leave it, I’m scared that if I do nothing, he’ll just disappear one day. I’ll wake up and suddenly he’ll have blocked me on all accounts and I will never hear from him again!”

“Are you listening to yourself?”, Sapnap interrupted a bit harshly and Dream shut up.

“Do you even trust George at all?”

Dumb question. “Of course, I do!”

“Doesn’t sound like it to me. Listen, Dream, I get it; this is scary for you. I know how big of a deal this entire situation is. But please, take a step back and hear yourself out; George is your best friend and I know you trust him more than anyone, but right now you’re creating all of these useless trust issues because of your own insecurities. I doubt that whatever George has going on will destroy your friendship, but this? This very well could, in the long run. Talk to him, Dream, tell him how worried you are about you guys’ friendship and how you’re starting to have doubts. You don’t even have to tell him that you’re in love with him if you don’t want to, even though I think it’s dumb to keep this a secret, but God, just tell him that this situation is starting to worry you!”, Sapnap demanded and Dream felt one single tear run down his cheek and fall on his lap.

It had never fully occurred to Dream how keeping a secret in a friendship otherwise so open could wear him down until he was an emotionally confused wreck that was slowly self-sabotaging the best thing he’d ever had.

“I’m the worst friend.”

Sapnap groaned, but it wasn’t malicious. “You know that’s not true, Dream. You’re just not thinking straight. Maybe go somewhere and clear your mind? Think about how to approach this?”

“I have to talk to him,” Dream stated absentmindedly, biting his lip, “I have to talk to him and I have to tell him that this situation is starting to get to me.”

“Exactly.”, Sapnap encouraged softly.

He knew all of this, of course he did. Maybe Dream just needed someone to hammer it into his head.

He was all too aware of how the constant repression of his feelings had sneakily followed him until he was cornered, and the only way to escape was running past George.

As much as Dream loved the blossoming feeling of warmth and content whenever he saw George’s infectious smile, he also loathed it. He loathed it, because after all the years he’d spent harbouring them, they were starting to wear him down. The more time went on, the stronger they got, the heavier they felt to carry since he couldn’t unload them anywhere, he had to carry them all by himself and he had arrived at a breaking point where the weight had gotten too much to bear.

Dream had tried everything; throw hints, joke, tease. He had made it a point to tell George he loved him as much as he could, even when the other never caught onto the actual meaning behind his carefully chosen words. He had tried to see other people; he had gone on dates. He had written poetry, he had made art, he had ranted to Sapnap. He had confessed to a stranger. He had done pretty much everything but confess his feelings to George.

Dream felt so very tired, no, exhausted. He wanted to avoid confrontation like the plague because despite it all, despite all the progress he’d made the past few years, the nagging insecurities still got the better of him, sometimes.

He feared rejection like he feared death; he knew it was inevitable and it always loomed over his head, there was nothing he could do but wait.

And yet, Dream wanted to be happy, too. He wanted to have someone by his side that he could love ever so openly and ardently, he wanted to bask in the freedom of being able to express himself with someone next to him loving him through it all.

What did he have to do to get over George? What in the world had to be strong enough to help Dream get rid of those inconvenient feelings?

But his idiotic heart didn’t want them gone. As much as Dream was hurting with the inevitability of George’s gentle rejection, he knew that there was no one he could ever love like he loved George.

George was Dream’s best friend; he trusted him, he loved him, he wanted the other by his side for the rest of his life, in whatever way George would have him. They always grew together, never apart, and that was a rare gift Dream didn’t share with most people.

Deep down in his heart Dream knew that if not George, who else? Who else could make him feel like his entire body was on fire, but the flames never burned, instead they gently embraced him and made him feel so very complete?

If just given the chance, Dream knew that him and George could make it work. They could, because their friendship alone was the perfect example of how well they fit together.

All that would change if Dream was to love George openly would be the relief of not having to carry the burden of years’ worth of pent-up feelings on his back in secret.

Dream ached to have the relief, and he felt like it was about time to try and seek it out.

“You know he can never love me back, right?”, Dream asked quietly and he already knew everything that Sapnap would be thinking.

Dream knew the other wanted to argue. He knew Sapnap wanted to groan, to tell the blonde that he was being oblivious and ridiculous, but both of them knew what George had said in the past. And both of them knew that they had to trust their friend’s word, as much as it may have hurt and disappointed.

“You should tell him, still. You need that, Dream.”, Sapnap responded and Dream smiled.

“Yeah, yeah I know I have to. I don’t think I’ll be able to get over him otherwise.”

Something in Sapnap’s tone sounded heavy; Dream wondered what the other was feeling. “Be careful, yeah? I’m only one call away.”

“I know.”

Dream stood up and walked towards his window, taking a deep breath at the iciness of the cold night air hitting his warm skin. “I have a date later today.”

Sapnap shifted on the other end of the line. “Will you go?”

Dream stared at the distant lights of a passing car. “Yeah. It’s my second date with the guy, I feel like I owe him an explanation.”

“Second one?”, Sapnap uttered in surprise.

Dream smiled sadly. “He’s a great guy, I guess I didn’t want to lose him just yet.”

“Do you think you’ll…?”, Sapnap asked carefully.

“No, no. I think I really like him and I’d love to have him in my life as a friend, if he’ll have me.”, Dream explained.

Sapnap hummed. “I see. So, there’s no chance he could help you, you know?”

Dream chuckled dejectedly. “No, at least not now. I don’t want to leave him dangling on the hook, he doesn’t deserve that. I am not ready for anyone that isn’t George right now, and there is no way he’d even wait for me that long.”

“Whatever you say, Dream. If you need me, just call me, yeah?”, Sapnap offered and the blonde nodded to himself.

“I will. I think that will be the last date for now. I’ll need time to heal after I tell George, and all that these dates have taught me is that trying to distract myself with others doesn’t work for me.”

“You know yourself best, Dream. Will you tell George afterwards?”, Sapnap questioned.

Dream closed his eyes and felt the gentle humidity of the rain hit his eyelids. “I believe so. I don’t think there’s any reason to wait now, anyway. The air in the house is tense because of our last conversation and honestly, if George gets uncomfortable, he can leave America the very next day. I won’t hold him back.”

“Good luck, man.”, Sapnap said and Dream couldn’t help but smile genuinely.

“Thank you. But hey, let’s look at this positively; you finally won’t have to deal with me rambling about my feelings for George anymore.”, Dream offered casually and chuckled lightly right after.

Sapnap’s tone sounded almost mournful. “You know it’s never been a bother to me, right? I’ll always listen to your every word if you need me to.”

“You’re a great friend, Sapnap,” Dream stated, feeling himself getting emotional again, “I’m so glad I have you in my life.”

Sapnap was clearly smiling when he spoke next. “The same goes for you, man. I love you; I hope this works out well.”

“I love you, too, Pandas, let’s hope that. Good night.”

“Good night, Dream.”

___

Dream grabbed his keys and wallet, slipping them into the pockets of his pants and heading straight to the front door. Patches ran up to him to say her goodbyes, but before the blonde could open the door, he heard a timid voice behind him speak up.

Dream turned around and was faced with the brunette for the first time in two days; the older male looked a lot more tired than he usually did.

“Where are you going?”

Dream felt worry settle in his heart when he noticed how much more quiet George’s voice seemed to sound; was he nervous?

“Why are you asking?”

George bit his lip while looking very conflicted. “I just want to know. You haven’t really talked to me.”

Dream didn’t know what to reply to that. After all, hadn’t George implied that he had done something that had upset the other? Hadn’t he basically told Dream that he had caused him pain?

Wasn’t it George who hadn’t even tried to knock on Dream’s door?

The blonde’s initial reaction to upsetting someone was always giving them space; George knew that. Had the other just not realized what he had told Dream two days ago?

Something within Dream told him that George’s behaviour was odd; he had to ask him what was wrong.

Dream had assumed that giving George a little bit of space might have helped, but it didn’t seem like that was the case. The blonde knew that a selfish part of him had avoided George for his own reasons; he couldn’t bear the tension around them; he couldn’t stomach moving around George when their usually calm and safe atmosphere had seemingly shattered and dissolved.

Dream could see the questioning look in his best friend’s eyes; he knew George seemed to want to ask more questions.

But Dream didn’t have time right now. He had somewhere to be.

“Listen, George; let’s talk about this later, yeah? I’ve got to go.”

George frowned. “What’s so important that you have to hurry away like that? I think there has been a misunderstanding or something, Dream. You’ve been acting weird around me and I feel like it’s my fault, I don’t want us to dance around each other. Can’t that thing wait?”

So, George did want to talk. Dream wondered if it hadn’t been for his conversation with Sapnap yesterday, would he have dropped all of his plans just to finally feel the relief of being able to tell George everything he felt?

“I’m sorry, Georgie, we can talk once I get back, okay?”, Dream offered more softly and began to wonder why the air around them had a touch of urgency.

George’s eyes darkened. “I’m tired of this, Dream.”

Dream wanted to stay; this was all he had wanted. And yet, the other hadn’t tried to talk to him at all the previous day, this wasn’t just Dream’s fault.

George finally seemed willing to open up. But Dream needed to do this; he needed to go on that date. He needed that final closure to move on. He wanted to leave that bad coping mechanism behind him so facing George would be easier. He hoped the other would understand.

“I know that, George, and I want to talk to you, too. I just can’t make my date wait even longer, I’m already running late.”, Dream explained quickly and turned around before he could see George’s reaction.

If he had waited a little to turn around, he might have seen the utter, unfiltered heartbreak in his best friend’s eyes.

“Oh.”

Dream failed to hear the fragility of George’s tone.

“I won’t be gone for too long, I hope. Just watch a movie or something, we can talk once I’m back.”, Dream said as he swung open his front door and ran towards his car.

He was too stressed to even take in what he had just promised George, and what that would mean for him.

Dream would deal with all of that later.

For now, he hopped into his car and checked the time, only to find that he’d be at least ten minutes late.

He felt the burning gaze of a pair of eyes follow him as he backed out of his drive-way.

___

Dream hopped out of his car and hurried toward their agreed-upon meeting spot. He felt himself let out a sigh of relief when he saw his date standing there, looking a little distressed but otherwise completely fine. And present, which was surprising. Maybe Dream had expected him to leave immediately after discovering he wasn’t there.

“Hey!”, Dream called out and the guy turned his head, breaking into a kind smile upon seeing the blonde.

“Hello.”

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I know I’m late, something came up, please forgive me.”, Dream quickly apologized and his date just chuckled.

“No worries, man. I got here a little late myself, we’re both guilty.”

Dream smiled gratefully and looked his date up and down.

Handsome; he was very handsome. A tall, attractive guy with light brown hair and the subtle hint of a beard, captivating brown eyes and a charming smile. Dream had found him quite intriguing from the beginning.

“I’m glad, then. So, shall we go?”, Dream asked and the guy nodded contently.

They started walking and Dream initiated a casual conversation.

He’d picked the date spot himself; a nice park where they could go on a walk and do nothing but talk.

Well, not quite. Maybe Dream had chosen this place because it seemed less like a date, but more like a friendly hang-out. And if his date decided to storm off after the inevitable rejection, it wouldn’t be as awkward as it would be in a restaurant, for instance.

“So, how have you been?”, the guy asked and Dream sighed.

“I won’t lie to you; not that great.”, the blonde replied honestly and felt bad at seeing the genuine concern in the other’s eyes.

“Why’s that? Care to share?”

Dream bit his lip. “Maybe later. Let’s just walk around for a bit, yeah?”

“Sure thing.”

They walked, and walked, and walked. Dream didn’t even realize how much time had passed.

He felt horrible; the guy he was with was the only person he felt remote interest for when he looked back on all the dates he’d gone on.

His personality was amazing and Dream found that he felt very comfortable around the other. He’d been the first guy Dream had believed to have a chance at getting over George with.

But he couldn’t do that to the other; he couldn’t promise him things Dream simply didn’t know he’d be able to keep.

That was probably why Dream felt so weird about the thought of straight up rejecting the other to his face.

The thing was; Dream had confessed that he had troubles with his dating life to Fundy the very first time they’d met, and the other had been nothing but understanding and kind.

That was probably why Dream had asked to go on a second date; he didn’t want to lose him, he wanted Fundy in his life.

As a friend. Would the other understand?

“You know, Clay, as much as I’m enjoying this, I do feel like there’s something up. Is this about George?”, Fundy asked and Dream swallowed, nodding guiltily.

Fundy even remembered George’s name.

_“Something’s burdening you.”, his date said and furrowed his brows, looking directly into Dream’s eyes._

_The latter didn’t have the strength to find an excuse. “Yeah, I’m sorry.”_

_Fundy waved his hand dismissively. “Don’t apologize. Personal struggles?”_

_“You could say that.”, Dream replied and decided then and there that he didn’t want to accidentally lead the guy on._

_“I’m kind of, eh, into someone else.”, he stated and immediately cringed at his own forwardness._

_Fundy, however, only tilted his head in confusion. “Oh? So, why are you here, then?”_

_“It’s complicated.”, Dream reasoned._

_“I have a right to know, don’t you think?”, Fundy asked and sighed. “I don’t want to waste my time here, either.”_

_“You’re right.”, Dream admitted defeatedly._

_Really, what did he have to lose?_

_“I’m in love with my best friend and there’s no way it could ever work out so I go on dates in hopes of getting over him but it doesn’t work and it just makes me feel worse.”_

_Fundy let out a low whistle. “Woah, that’s a lot to take in. First of all, what’s your friend’s name, if I may ask?”_

_Dream felt an odd sense of relief about mentioning George. It felt like admitting a secret. “George.”_

_“Oh, you’re long gone.”, Fundy said and chuckled which prompted Dream to startle._

_“What?”_

_Fundy smiled, but there was no pity in his expression, the blonde couldn’t help but feel relief at that. “You even say his name with so much affection. Man, this must suck for you.”_

_Oh, he was very forward._

_“Well, yeah.”, Dream admitted and felt his cheeks grow a little hot in embarrassment._

_“No need to get flustered, I get it. How about we ditch this date and go hang out somewhere else, instead? Get your mind off of things?”, Fundy suggested and Dream agreed gratefully._

_They ended up going to a bar nearby and Fundy bought him a drink. Dream remembered the night vividly; he finally felt lighter than he had in weeks, Fundy’s casual presence was a great distraction. The blonde found that the other was an incredibly interesting person, and he realized that out of all the people he had met on his dating-spree, Fundy was the only one worth remembering._

_“Thank you.”, Dream said after they left the bar and the fresh night air hit their flushed faces._

_Fundy smiled. “No need to thank me, dude, it’s no big deal. I’m glad to see you let loose a little.”_

_Dream felt a tiny bit of dread at the thought of Fundy leaving and the blonde never seeing him again, but he didn’t know if it was appropriate to ask the other to stay in contact with him when Dream had outright admitted that he was not interested in the brunette romantically._

_He asked, anyway, because there was at least one situation where he could voice his feelings without the fear of abandonment eating away at him._

_“Care to do this again?”_

_Fundy looked at him for a while, inspecting every part of Dream’s face. The latter felt like he had been put under thousands of bright lights all at once._

_“You’re asking me out on a second date?”_

_Dream might have panicked a little. He didn’t have enough time to come up with a good way to explain that he wasn’t really asking the other out on a date, rather a friendly hang-out. “Yeah?”_

_Fundy barked out a laugh and he continued laughing all the way until they reached the bus stop. “Of course, man. I’ll go on a second date with you, if you know what I mean.”_

_Dream hoped that both of them were on the same page._

_“Then it’s settled. I’ll text you?”_

_Fundy typed his number into Dream’s phone and gave the device back to him, shooting him another amused smile. “Sure thing. Take the bus home, get your car tomorrow. You’ve had a drink or two.”_

_Dream returned his smile. “Thanks. See you next time.”_

_“See you next time, lover boy.”_

“Of course, it’s about George.”, Dream agreed with an exaggerated deep exhale and Fundy shot him a compassionate smile.

“Listen, man; I know we treat this like a date as a joke, but we both know it isn’t. You rejected me, like, half an hour into our actual date.”

Dream cringed and Fundy only giggled.

“Why did you ask me?”

Dream looked at Fundy; the evening had arrived and the dim street lights of the park made the other’s expression look all the more questioning.

“What do you mean?”

Fundy turned his gaze away. “You know; you could have just asked me to hang out with you.”

“I felt bad for rejecting you like that a few weeks ago. Plus, I didn’t have enough time to come up with a way to tell you I wanted to be your friend.”, Dream confessed and Fundy just shook his head.

“I don’t care. I had a great time afterwards, and I’d love to have you as a friend, man.”

Dream’s eyes lit up. “You would?”

Fundy looked at him as if he was the most clueless man alive. He probably was. “Sure! I like you, and I don’t mind that we’re not doing this with romantic context.”

Dream felt relieved. “You’re the only person I’ve gone on a second date with.”

Fundy grinned. “This hardly counts as a date, but I am flattered, nonetheless.”

“You should be,” Dream said confidently which earned him a slight slap from Fundy, “it’s not an everyday occurrence that you get to go on a date with someone as good looking and interesting as me.”

Fundy snorted. “Oh, lucky me.”

Dream looked at his friend with gratitude. “But seriously; thank you for being this understanding. I just wanted to let you know formally that I can’t go on anymore dates.”

Fundy hummed. “I appreciate the sentiment, but telling your date that you’re into someone else is a pretty solid form of rejection, if you ask me. I got the message, but I won’t complain about this little hangout since it’s been a lot of fun. Now, tell me why you’re here and not with George?”

“I might have, uhm,” Dream said as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, “I might have left him at home.”

Fundy’s eyes narrowed. “You’re a dumbass.”

“We had this planned already! I wasn’t going to cancel just because of George.”

Fundy nodded in acknowledgement. “That’s sweet of you, but you should go back home. You seem distressed and if there’s something up with you and George, you should figure that out first before going on ‘dates’. We can meet up whenever, George is more important right now.”

“I know.”, Dream admitted and checked the time, realizing that he’d already been gone for around three hours.

“I guess this is my cue to leave. Will I see you again?”

Fundy rolled his eyes in amusement. “Yes, bring George next time.”

Dream smiled. “Will do.”

They said their goodbyes and Dream started walking towards his car with a light feeling in his chest. He’d be okay.

He could hear Fundy call for him a few feet away.

“Go get your mans!”

“Oh, shut up!”

___

Dream opened his front door with a determination he didn’t know he had.

The hallway was dark; however, from where Dream was standing, he could make out the scarce light of a TV illuminating the entrance of his living room.

The blonde took off his jacket and shoes and took a deep breath, looking at himself in the mirror.

_You can do this; it’s been long enough._

Dream was tired. He was tired of worrying, being afraid, being unable to express his affections.

He had tried his hardest to step away, to not focus on his feelings for George’s sake; he wanted his best friend to feel comfortable, he wanted him to enjoy this trip.

But Dream had a feeling that by doing that, he’d only gone and made things worse.

George deserved honesty; he deserved it just as much as Dream did.

The guilt of all the secrets he’d hidden from his best friend made the blonde feel sick to his stomach, and he disliked how it took him this long to come to his senses.

Seriously, he would have to send Sapnap a bouquet of flowers or something.

Nervously, he took uncertain steps forward, trying to calm his rapidly beating heart.

Dream had never felt this worried about confessing; his relationships with his girlfriends had been very easy, and his boyfriend had confessed first.

Come to think of it, Dream realized that this was the first time he’d be confessing his love to a friend of his.

George at that. He really had to go all out, huh?

But despite his concerns, Dream rationalized with himself that this was the only sensible thing he could do to try and improve the situation.

Somewhere along the line Dream had realized for himself that admitting to not being straight to George was the least of his worries. He still felt an old anxious feeling somewhere deep inside of him, but the blonde chose to ignore it. He was sick and tired of letting his past insecurities dictate his present life.

George would understand. Why had Dream stalled for so long?

Looking back, his reasonings for keeping his feelings secret felt a lot more insignificant. Dream had worried so much about making George feel uncomfortable and pressured that he’d completely subtracted himself from the equation. And Dream was uncomfortable, he was so damn uncomfortable with the tension between him and George at the present moment.

In the end, Dream wanted George to be happy. And he wanted to be happy, too. Them drifting apart because of something harmless left unsaid was not an option in his book, now that he’d seen what hoarding secrets could do to their balance, their rhythm.

George would accept him. George would love and appreciate him for who he was. George was the kindest, most understanding person Dream knew, he trusted his best friend to react kindly to the news he was about to break.

Dream decided that it was best to explain everything to George before he’d say the words that had burned his tongue more times than he could count, begging to be said but being silenced by Dream’s own irrationality.

“George? I’m home.”, he called out as he approached the living room, ready to take a peek inside.

No response.

Dream wasn’t necessarily alarmed by that; they’d not been communicating well, after all.

George was probably still mad that he had left the way he had.

“Hey, man, I’m sorry for leaving like that. I’m here now, though.”, Dream began cautiously and walked into the living room.

The TV was silent; some random channel was playing on mute.

The blonde saw George right away; he was sitting on the floor, his back against the couch, his hand tenderly brushing through Patches’ soft fur.

Dream felt his heart soften immediately, but the gentle atmosphere didn’t last long.

The blonde walked around the couch to talk to George, only to have his eyes widen in shock.

George had been crying.

He had been crying _a lot_ , by the looks of it.

His blank stare was stubbornly trained on the TV screen, but Dream could clearly see the slight shimmer of tear stains travelling down his cheeks, not to mention the redness and puffiness of his face. George’s eyes seemed red, even in the darkness of the room, and Dream’s heart broke.

Had he really upset the other this much? Or worse, had something else happened that elicited such a drastic reaction from George?

“Georgie? What’s wrong?”, Dream said carefully as he walked up to his best friend, heart hurting more and more with each step he took. “Did something happen?”

Dream tried to put a reassuring hand on George’s shoulder, but the other just pushed it away weakly. Dream retrieved his hand as if it had been burned, and he felt his body freeze when George turned his head to look at him, gaze so scarily void of any emotion Dream wasn’t sure if it was his best friend in front of him or just a vacuous shell.

“You.”

Dream furrowed his brows in confusion, not finding the words to ask George what he meant by that.

Turns out, he didn’t have to, because the other just smiled sarcastically and shook his head a tiny bit. “It’s you, Dream. You happened.”

Dream’s worries grew with each passing second, and for the first time in his life, he wasn’t able to understand George. “What? What are you talking about?”

George started at the TV; eyes unmoving. Dream noticed that the brunette’s skin was much paler than he remembered. “Did you have fun on your date?”

In all the years they’d spent by each other’s side, not once had Dream been this clueless about George’s behaviour.

Clearly, the other was emotionally conflicted. As empty as his gaze looked, Dream saw behind the curtain of pretence and directly into a look so pain-stricken it almost made him take a step back.

Dream spoke with a slight hint of desperation after the brunette didn’t make any move to reply to him. “George, what the hell is going on? What happened to you?”

“Didn’t I tell you already? Now, answer my question.”

Dream’s frown deepened. “George, are you even in your right mind? Please tell me what’s wrong so I can try to fix it!”

“You can’t _fix_ this,” George said, finger quoting the word _fix_.

“At least tell me what happened! You’re scaring me.”, Dream said with all the worry he could muster up.

George sighed. “Listen, Dream; I’m not in the mood for this. Just go to your room and leave me alone.”

Dream felt anger boil within him. What the hell was going on? Even with the weird air around the house, him and George hadn’t actually fought, per se. They’d just been weird around each other because of something that had been said. It wasn’t a big deal, at least not to Dream. However, George’s behaviour indicated that there was definitely something else, and Dream was sick and tired of George not telling him, instead choosing to allow the situation to escalate. He didn’t want George to make the same mistake he did.

“No, I won’t. We’ll sit here, and we’ll talk about this, if you want to or not, George.”, Dream said sternly, eying the other with a determined gaze he knew the brunette could see from the corner of his eyes. “I won’t tolerate our friendship taking hits because of something stupid like this.”

“Stupid?”, George asked and Dream swallowed down the urge to groan.

“Yes, stupid! George, you’ve not told me anything, all you said was that I did something wrong and now you’re acting weirder than you’ve ever done before! Don’t you see that this is taking a toll on me, too? For God’s sake, George, tell me what I did to upset you!”, Dream let out in frustration and he felt a weight lift off his chest.

Finally, at least he’d said it.

Now, it was George’s turn.

“When did I ever say you did something wrong?”, George asked and Dream picked up on both the hint of anger and confusion.

Dream grabbed his own hand in an attempt to stay calm. “At the picknick! You’ve been dealing with something, you told me weeks ago, and then when I asked, all you said was that it had to do with me! What else was I supposed to think, huh?”

George finally looked at him, expression laced with many different kinds of emotions Dream couldn’t pick up on in time. “Oh my God, that’s not even what I meant! Don’t act like you know everything!”

“Then tell me, for fuck’s sake!”, Dream said, lowering his voice after he realized he’d said it a tad bit louder than he had intended to. “You go on and on about how complicated it is, and that it involves me, but you never bother to explain it to me! George, you’ve been acting off for so long, don’t you think it’s normal for me to assume that there’s something going on that upsets you?”

“It doesn’t matter.”, George said and Dream wondered why he sounded so defeated.

Dream was tired, but above all, he was scared. “It does! Jesus, what’s up with you? I don’t want to fight with you, George, but this isn’t just about you. I don’t know what kind of emotional conflict you’re going through right now, and if you don’t tell me what I did wrong, I can’t improve!”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, that’s the problem here!”, George cried out and Dream shut up briefly.

“You did nothing wrong, Dream, this is not your fault, okay? I’m sorry I made you feel like it was, but, God, just forget it!”, George explained, his tone quieting down with each word he said.

Dream felt tears threaten to fall but he blinked them back, trying his hardest to stay strong for at least a little while longer. “George, are you hearing yourself? I won’t forget this, why the fuck would I? You’re hurting, I’m not blind, if there’s anything _at all_ that I can do, please, just tell me already! I hate to see you like this.”

George sighed. “Don’t. Just don’t. I’m fine, whatever you think is going on is fine. Shit, I shouldn’t have come here.”

Dream felt his heart shatter at the other’s words. “What?”

“It was so naïve of me; I should have thought more about this. Of course, I should have known I’d never be brave enough.”, George mumbled, more to himself rather than Dream.

“What on Earth are you saying? George, please, you know you can tell me anything, right?”, Dream admitted in defeat as his shoulders sacked and he threatened to sit down on the floor himself, just to feel more grounded.

George looked at him, and Dream hated that he saw fresh tears in the other’s eyes. “I do, I’m sorry. Fuck, why is this so damn complicated?!”

“Then tell me! Tell me so we can figure this out together!”, Dream said more urgently now and he felt the tears more than ever when George only shook his head.

“It doesn’t really matter that much anymore, now, does it? Dream, I’m sorry. I think I’ll go back home.”, George breathed and Dream felt like the entire world had taken a wrong turn.

“Is that really what will help you?”, Dream asked as he tried to keep his composure, feeling his entire body ache with the thought of George leaving.

Why did it feel so final? He was overthinking, he was definitely being irrational again. Dream would have none of that anymore.

“Do you think you’ll be okay, George? I won’t keep you here, I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable around me.”, Dream explained and he saw George’s mouth twitch, “Are you a hundred percent sure? Is there nothing I can do?”

“I’ll be fine, Dream, don’t worry. And hey, you’ll have your date to keep you company.”

All of a sudden, Dream felt like it was enough.

Enough with the secrecy, enough with the sleepless nights due to worry and dread. Enough with the misunderstandings, the carefully avoidant words, enough with everything that was eating away at their bond of trust.

Dream had enough.

“His company is great, but you’re my best friend, God fucking damn it, George!”

Time stopped. Dream held his breath.

Because he didn’t expect George to react the way he did.

The brunette’s eyes widened, comically, even, and Dream’s eyes followed a single tear that rolled down George’s cheek with a painfully slow pace.

George didn’t say a single word; his mouth was slightly ajar and Dream felt his own heart seize with pain as he stared into the absolutely devastated look in George’s eyes.

The brunette stood up abruptly, causing Dream to sway back a little, and as the blonde noticed more and more tears running down his best friend’s cheeks, George walked past him and to his room wordlessly, leaving Dream to stand in the living room all alone, speechless, worried and absolutely confused.

Dream tried to make sense of the situation; he really did. He knew this was nothing like George; the older had never before acted this way. George wasn’t an irrational person, but Dream knew that this time, he had been, for whatever reason.

If it hadn’t been for the terrible pain George’s eyes reflected, Dream might have thought this was the brunette throwing some kind of fit, or being unreasonable.

And well, he was being unreasonable, but Dream sensed that there was much more behind the way he’d acted, for months now.

And it hurt. Of course, it hurt a lot. Dream had been scared to tell people all his life, so having his best friend walk away from him after such a subtle confession made Dream dangle close to the edge of a bottomless pit full of old self-doubt and fears.

But Dream knew better than this. And, he knew George.

Something was up. Something had been brewing for a long time. Dream knew because for him, that was the case, too.

Instead of allowing himself to let a misunderstanding eat away at his self-awareness, Dream decided that he wouldn’t let George off the hook this easily.

They had to talk. They had to speak about whatever this was, before the other left Dream all alone in the vast lands of Florida, only to return to Britain and play down the situation’s severeness even more.

Dream turned around, ready to walk towards George’s door and knock, when he noticed something that held a significance so enormous Dream felt his confidence return slowly but surely.

George hadn’t closed his door. He’d left it a tad bit open.

This was all the invitation Dream needed.

Sure in his steps, the blonde walked up to the door, turning and sitting down softly, back pressed against the wall right next to it.

He could make out quiet sniffs from the other side of the wall, but Dream chose not to comment on it. And he also chose not to walk in.

No, Dream had enough.

The next time he’d see George, he’d face him with eyes that no longer held secrets behind them.

“I grew up in a homophobic neighbourhood.”, Dream started gently, leaning his head against the cold wall, too, his gaze directed at the grey ceiling of his living room.

“It was pretty hard, not gonna lie. To be honest, it left a few scars that I’m still trying to heal right now.”, Dream gulped, gathering all the courage he could summon to get through this without tripping over his own feet.

“Point is; I’ve struggled with my sexuality for a long time, George. I know I haven’t been truthful to you, and believe me, I am incredibly sorry about that.”, Dream admitted and decided that if he was going to be honest, he’d tell George the entire truth.

“Remember that one time when we were teens? You’d just broken up with your girlfriend and well, I was harbouring feelings for someone. We had that long talk about relationships, and you asked me if there was a girl I liked. I was too scared back then, nobody knew at that point that the person I was into was a guy, but oh well, I panicked. I regret that I did. I hesitated for too long, and your kind hearted self asked me if there was a boy I liked, instead. I wish I’d been braver back then, Georgie, but I wasn’t. I lied to you, I told you I was straight, because I was terrified and I acted irrationally in the moment. Looking back, I wish I had told you right then and there. You even offered me such an easy opportunity, but I was young and insecure, George, I regret not telling you more than you can imagine.”

“There was never another opportunity that felt right after that day. I don’t know why, but I guess it never came up in conversations anymore, and I was still too insecure to just reach out to you and tell you myself. I hate that this was the one thing I was never able to share with you.”

“And really, it only kept getting more complicated. Of course, I just couldn’t have an easy journey, no. The more my confidence in my sexuality grew, the more those feelings did, too. You helped me so much, George, even when you never knew. At least I assume you didn’t.”

“I think I know the moment when I first realized I was in love with you. We’d been in a Discord call, years ago, watching a movie. You’d joked around because I wasn’t feeling well that day. You picked up on something I said and stopped the movie just for that, because you knew me better than anyone else. You comforted me, you made me forget about whatever was bothering me for the entire time we spent together that day, and I still remember how warm my chest had felt, how desperately I wanted to ask you to turn on the camera so I could see you smile and forget anything and everything in this world that wasn’t you, George. I still remember the blush I noticed on my cheeks when I went to the bathroom after our call, and I also remember the crushing feeling of realizing that I couldn’t just reach out to you like I wanted to, because there was an entire ocean between us. I think I was in love with you before that, too, but that was the moment I think I finally caught on.”

Dream had never felt this free. He’d never felt like he could just float weightlessly in the air because of all the heavy words he’d finally let escape his body. It was an amazing feeling, and it gave him hope that no matter what George’s reaction would be, he’d not falter. This was worth more than any weight a rejection could put on his shoulders.

“I know that’s a lot to take it, George, I wouldn’t blame you for avoiding me until you leave for Britain. But I just couldn’t keep this in anymore. I noticed how me not being entirely truthful was starting to weigh down us both, and my insecurities were starting to attack my trust in you. I completely misdirected my feelings, and I am so, so sorry about that. I promise you that from now on, I’ll talk to you first before letting the situation get out of hand like that.”

“I’m sorry, Georgie. I never meant to create a situation like this for you. Believe me, if I could choose, I’d not be in love with you. It would be easier. But I can’t control that, and no matter what I do, who I try to date, you just don’t leave my mind. I am so damn sorry, George, I’m sorry that I love you in this way. Don’t feel pressured to reply, I’ll take anything as long as we can just keep going like we did before this mess.”

Dream felt the need to continue rambling, but his mouth fell shut when he heard rustling in the room next to him, and as he turned his head, he saw the door open wider and George walk out with timid steps, tears in his eyes and bottom lip red from biting down on it for too long.

Dream stared at him, because fuck, what else was he supposed to do? He’d poured his entire heart out to George, he’d told him literally everything he’d been too afraid to voice for a long time, yet the gentle liberating sensation inside of his chest only grew when he looked into the other’s eyes.

George’s eyes were glistening with understanding. Dream could have cried in relief.

In the living room that was only lit up by the silent TV playing in the background, Dream stared up at George who was looking down on him, lip between his teeth but his posture nothing but soft.

And then, George moved.

Right into Dream’s arms.

The blonde felt the air be quite literally knocked out of his lungs as George fell into his arms, sitting down on Dream’s lap and desperately clinging onto his shoulders. The brunette’s grip tightened with every small sob that shook his body, and Dream immediately wrapped his own arms around the other protectively, resting his head on George’s trembling one.

His head and heart were filled with nothing but relief and gratitude.

He knew George. Of course, he’d never have judged Dream the way the blonde’s nightmares loved to tell him.

If it was up to Dream, he could have taken on the entire world in that moment.

Dream didn’t know how long they sat on the floor, but eventually, George’s shoulders stopped shaking and he lifted his head as Dream followed suit, only to rest their foreheads together.

Dream stared at George with wide eyes, their proximity making his veins pulse with electricity.

George let out one single, watery giggle. “You idiot. You absolute, stupid idiot. Why am I so in love with you, huh?”

Dream stared at him wordlessly, before he broke out into tears, too.

He had so many questions he wanted to ask George. So many things he wanted to know. Everything that had been going through George’s head, everything that he was currently thinking about. Dream wanted George to explain it all to him, start to finish, so his mind could at least begin to understand a fraction of what George had just implied. No, confessed.

Dream had confessed his love. George had, too.

_It was so, so hard to be in love with someone who could never love you back._

It was even harder to realize that you might have been wrong about that.

“You’re such an idiot, oh my God, you’re my idiot.”, George chuckled breathlessly and Dream found himself starting to chuckle along, his vision blurring more and more with fresh tears that George just kept gently wiping away with his thumb.

Sitting on the cold, wooden floor, holding the man he loved the most in his arms, Dream finally let all of his guards down and decided that he was willing to do anything to protect what they had.

They still had to talk; Dream knew that. The blissful euphoria he felt at George’s words coated his heart with so much positivity and delight. Dream felt strong enough to fight for this. He wanted to do his best to keep this new blossom they’d grown between them alive. But there was so much he still didn’t know, and he was sure George felt the same way. He trusted his best friend; he knew George would explain everything to him. Dream felt his lips stretch into the brightest smile he’d worn in what felt like far too long, because they had time. Now, they had all the time and patience in the world. The blonde felt positive that they’d survive every storm coming their way.

George closed his eyes, and so did Dream.

All the years of longing were nothing compared to the feeling of finally coming home as their lips connected, and Dream swore he’d never tasted anything better.

___

Dream held George tightly by his side, their bodies pressed against each other with so much warmth and comfort.

The brunette’s head lay lazily on his shoulder, and Dream’s arm had wrapped itself around the other’s body protectively.

The gentle sound of waves rang in their ears as all that mattered in the moment were each other’s soft breaths and the wind enveloping them in a somewhat cold but comforting embrace.

Dream started into the distance, studying the way waves would gently approach the coast and disappear before getting too close to them, basking in the feeling of George playing with his fingers absentmindedly and shifting closer to him every once in a while.

The sun hung low in the sky, ready to disappear behind the horizon any second. She left a trail of diamond-like shimmer on top of the deeply blue water, almost like a blinding path to her endless warmth.

Dream had all the warmth he could have ever needed, right by his side.

Blissful and serene, the blonde had never felt this free.

“God, Dream, I thought I was too late, you know? For months, I had worried about confessing because I thought you could never love me back, and then Sapnap had mentioned your dating spree and it made me feel even more hopeless. I never expected you to reciprocate my feelings, I came to America in the hopes of confessing to you so I’d be able to move on, but I soon realized I just couldn’t bring myself to. And then, you said you’d be going on another date, and then you implied your date was a guy.”, Dream turned his eyes away from the sunset and gently placed a kiss on George’s forehead, burying his nose in the other’s hair which seemed to calm George down. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt as many conflicting emotions as I did that day. The moment I found out I actually could have had a chance, I realized that I was probably too late, already. I was so angry with myself because of that, I’m so sorry you had to witness that. I-“

Dream took George’s chin in his hands gently and turned his head so the other would be looking at him. He started softly caressing the brunette’s jaw with his thumb. “We don’t have to talk about this now.”

George leaned into his touch. “I know.” He lifted his hand to gently wrap it around Dream’s wrist, returning the other’s soft gesture. “I just had to say this because you deserve to know. Fuck, I thought my entire world was falling apart.”

Dream pressed a tender kiss on George’s red nose. “Don’t worry about it now, let’s talk when we get back home, deal?”

George smiled, eyes glistening with the golden light of the sunset and the reflection of Dream’s brilliantly green eyes. “Deal.”

The brunette rested his head on Dream’s shoulder again, holding onto his hand above the blonde’s gently beating heart.

Dream sighed deeply, returning his gaze to the now dazzlingly colourful sky.

Time didn’t matter, they had enough at their hands.

Dream felt more confident than ever before.

They’d talk and they’d figure out everything there was to understand.

After all, George was Dream’s best friend.

He had loved him long before he fell in love with him.

“I love you, Georgie.”

“I love you, too, Dream.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tadaa !!
> 
> we have arrived at the end (kind of). thank you all so much for your kind support, it means the world to me !! this story was a ride, and certainly a challenge for me, not gonna lie, i re-did this chapter a couple of times before i decided on this version haha. i hope you enjoyed <3
> 
> p.s; for those interested, i uploaded a little epilogue, too !! with that oneshot, the series is officially over.
> 
> (and yes, because of fanfiction magic, fundy now lives in the us. take it or leave it.)
> 
> if you wanna talk to me, you can find me as @acumirklis_ on twt ;)
> 
> have a great day, take care <3

**Author's Note:**

> BOOM  
> Finally, these doofuses met up irl lol  
> I hope you liked it!! <3
> 
> Just to clear up some potential confusion: At the time I'd written the first two oneshots, the vlog was still believed to have happened haha, so I decided to just leave it at that, since I'd have to change things otherwise. Also, for the sake of simplicity, corona as we know it doesn't exist in this timeline, since George going to Florida safely would otherwise be harder to execute. This is fiction, anyway, so hopefully it's not too bothersome.
> 
> Have a great day, take care and love yourself <3


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